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franknfurter
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09 Jan 2015, 4:18 pm

I am happy to be diagnosed, I wanted to know for ages and now I do.


but I now feel a lot more awkward with people and I just feel more unhappy and I don't want to be with people as much.

I am thinking that my knowledge that I have Asperger's, is making me self conscious, more aware or I am thinking that I am less capable than I actually am.

did anyone go through this phase, I was only diagnosed about a month ago.



Raleigh
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09 Jan 2015, 4:22 pm

I'm newly diagnosed and I've never been so depressed in my life.


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franknfurter
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09 Jan 2015, 4:30 pm

did you have suspicions beforehand? its quite complicated, I thought it would make me happy to realise that this is why I have problems, but I find the confirmation upsetting, I don't know why.



Raleigh
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09 Jan 2015, 4:38 pm

It's complicated for me. I have other disorders as well. I'm possibly more depressed about those than the ASD diagnosis. It's upsetting because a chapter of my life is closed and I'm not sure where to go from here. Yes, I suspected for years.


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franknfurter
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09 Jan 2015, 4:46 pm

yeah I know what you mean, I spend a year and a half suspecting Asperger's, and I somehow thought knowing would help me in a practical way, in terms of getting a job etc. instead I still feel as if I can't do things, but now that's gotten worse.

I was so sure I had it and so sure that knowing would do something

i don't know about you but i have fallen into a rut since leaving education



Raleigh
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09 Jan 2015, 4:48 pm

I'm very thankful to have a diagnosis. The processing of the diagnosis is wearing me out.


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Raleigh
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09 Jan 2015, 4:52 pm

If you could do things before, nothing has changed except for you thinking you now can't do things. If you've done them before the diagnosis, you can do them again.


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Eloa
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09 Jan 2015, 4:57 pm

I had no suspicion of being autistic before being diagnosed, diagnosis was proposed by other people because they saw me struggeling a lot and being out of synch with many aspects of "normal life", but I was too much into myself to even realize it.
Sometimes I regret the gained consciousness about autism a bit,
before I was just me and now I can read up on symptoms and I know the technical terms and everything, especially as autism became a special interest for a period of about 3 years, interacting with my former special interest which I had for more than 20 years I am glad has changed back.
On the good side I now have a lot of accommodation, but sometimes I would want to go back to the time before the diagnosis, where the way I am is not a myriad of symptoms that I can look up.
Before diagnosis I have thought of myself that I did not really "have fully come down to earth yet", that I would need more time than others to fully incoporate, I always wrote down "Time has forgotten me" and I thought once it was done, and once time will wait a bit for me I would be able to archieve things others do,
but after diagnosis I realized that this is what it is, the symptoms will never disappear, and some affect me severely.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Jan 2015, 4:58 pm

Your cats definitely don't know that you're autistic :wink:

They think you're the cat's meow :D



franknfurter
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09 Jan 2015, 4:58 pm

I know, my thoughts are my worst enemy, I don't consciously think things but I know that's the reason, I am trying to just forget I was diagnosed, I know logically it make no difference, people don't magically change because of a label.

I am just lacking overall confidence, university fell through and since then I have lost confidence, its so easy to get into a state of inactivity in all areas, I suppose I am probably depressed as well, I find it difficult to tell.



franknfurter
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09 Jan 2015, 5:02 pm

Eloa wrote:
I had no suspicion of being autistic before being diagnosed, diagnosis was proposed by other people because they saw me struggeling a lot and being out of synch with many aspects of "normal life", but I was too much into myself to even realize it.
Sometimes I regret the gained consciousness about autism a bit,
before I was just me and now I can read up on symptoms and I know the technical terms and everything, especially as autism became a special interest for a period of about 3 years, interacting with my former special interest which I had for more than 20 years I am glad has changed back.
On the good side I now have a lot of accommodation, but sometimes I would want to go back to the time before the diagnosis, where the way I am is not a myriad of symptoms that I can look up.
Before diagnosis I have thought of myself that I did not really "have fully come down to earth yet", that I would need more time than others to fully incoporate, I always wrote down "Time has forgotten me" and I thought once it was done, and once time will wait a bit for me I would be able to archieve things others do,
but after diagnosis I realized that this is what it is, the symptoms will never disappear, and some affect me severely.


yeah, very good way of putting it, it won't go away and they cannot be changed easily, I just can't see myself having a job and being independent, that feeling was compounded by a diagnosis I think. I love that line time has forgotten me, it certainly feels that way sometimes, especially when others have adult lives and you don't.



Eloa
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09 Jan 2015, 5:12 pm

franknfurter wrote:
I love that line time has forgotten me, it certainly feels that way sometimes, especially when others have adult lives and you don't.


I call it the "adult milestones", that I did not reach.


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Eloa
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09 Jan 2015, 5:15 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Your cats definitely don't know that you're autistic :wink:

They think you're the cat's meow :D


I meow together with my cats.
One is very talkative.
He does not have Aspergers.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Jan 2015, 5:21 pm

I've had four adult cats in my life.

1. A proper Victorian lady named Whitey.

2. A street strumpet named Tootsie.

3. A ladies man named Floyd.

4. A spoiled Persian named Zum Zum (She had Aspergian traits; she didn't liked to be brushed because of the sensory issues involved).

I apologize for going off topic.

I think you have to not let your diagnosis rule you. You could be "diagnosed" with a cold. Do you go around saying you're a "cold person?"



Last edited by kraftiekortie on 09 Jan 2015, 5:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Raleigh
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09 Jan 2015, 5:30 pm

Give yourself a new label. Make it whatever you want it to be. I've always advocated for self-diagnosis.

I diagnose myself unstoppable with shiploads of inner strength and resilience.
I am persistent beyond measure.
I delight in my own company.
I am a master of regeneration (I am regenerating atm).
I am what I believe myself to be.


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