I was diagnosed with HFA/Aspergers when I was 12

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pdbq
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11 Feb 2015, 3:41 pm

When I was 12 I was diagnosed with HFA/Aspergers after several tests, the year after that I was put on a medication called risperdal which gave me a disorder called derealization. I was taken off of it for a while, the disorder went away but then the next year (2011) I was put back on it after my violent outbursts-- the derealization has came back and have had it since then. Only now have the symptoms of derealization slowly began fading.

I never always had trouble socializing until I was 14, before that I was "normal." It wasn't until I took this medication when I started having speech impediment issues, trouble thinking clearly and started having violent outbursts. I believe my diagnosis was false because I do not exhibit most of the symptoms typical of people with autism/Aspergers. I do not have sensory overload, I am aware of how to socialize properly it's just that my speech impediment and thinking is holding me back.

My thoughts seem like they're hidden behind clouds when I try to speak, when I can construct a sentence I always get words mixed up or forget what I was going to say.

Sometimes I have violent outbursts towards my parents and other family members, not because I have a "sensory overload", but because they piss me off and I do not care for them. I usually think about killing other people, or attacking them severely, sometimes I just don't think about doing it-- I get actual physical urges to strangle someone or smash their head in the wall. I do not know why I have become this way since I took this medication, but it has made me socially withdrawn.

I have been diagnosed with many other disorders in the past, I was diagnosed with AD/HD when I was 5 and panic disorder when I was 8 (which I actually know I have although I do not get them much anymore).

Is there any one out there who can provide any helpful information with the situation I'm in? I honestly believe this medication I took knocked my chemical balance way off wack which is the cause of all of these issues I am having, and I don't seem to be the only one who has gotten issues after taking this drug called "risperdal."



GoldTails95
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11 Feb 2015, 4:13 pm

I am officially diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome as well at the age of 6. I still carry the diagnostic label now. The doctors and my parents proubably and most likely assume that all high functioning people om the spectrum have Aspergers. But however, since I had a speech delay (detour/regression that is), that diagnosis is wrong (The Golden Rule of an Aspergers Diagnosis is no speech delay/detour). In fact, actually I had what is called Regressive Autism, which occurs in a quarter of cases with an ASD, because I had just about normal NT development from birth and even spoke babbly early at age 1. I also what was once considered by my family, a happy sweet, social toddler. Then, when I was 15 months old, that all changed. I lost all the social skills and speech that I had before. In addtion to that at the same time, I was doing repetitive, bizzare behaviors like jumping and flapping and running around holsing toys, which I am supposed to play with, near my ear. I did not speak again until I was 4 years old. Despite my toddlerhood regression, my psycharagist diagnosed me as Asperger's Syndrome since I was very high functioning thanks to restless immediate early intervention by my parents.
Because of the regression I had when i was a toddler, I decided to look up what I actually am. From sources, i had thoughts that I most likely actually have the official diagnosis, "Autistic Disorder" or more informally, level based "High Functioning Autism". But since I did not want to really gamble with the dangers of self diagnosis, I was self-diagnosed with "PDD(NOS)" at age 19. To me that is the label I currently have until my next appointment with the same psycharagist that diagnosed me as Aspergers. This is because though I look like more if I have "High Functioning Autism", which I most likely actually have, I not only did not want to waste time and knowledge on diagnosing myself on what I REALLY have, but since I am not a doctor and even if I myself is one, self-diagnosis is considered dangerous. So to get a better idea of what I really have while playing it safe on self diagnosis at the same time, I chose to diagnose myself as "PDD(NOS)", which is a "catch-all" umbrella phase for people like me who really show symptons of autism but don't really know what symptons I actually have unless I go to that same psycharacgist that diagnosed me as Aspergers.


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alomoes
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11 Feb 2015, 4:19 pm

You are learning. Eventually, you'll be like Tesla. I think. Or you'll be insane. Well, Tesla was both.


Or you'll be Einstein. I don't know. But ignore the labeling theory. <--- This is a use of the labeling theory.



Jacoby
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11 Feb 2015, 4:29 pm

Risperdal is a terrible zombie drug with awful sometimes permanent side effects that should only be perscribed to the truly psychotic, it was perscriped tito me as well but I never considered taking it after reading about it and my mother who worked in the mental health field agreed with my assessment. I think its pretty crazy how they'll give this drug out and SSRIs like nothing but won't give me actual useful drugs because of their potential for "abuse".



GoldTails95
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11 Feb 2015, 4:59 pm

I was tested for ADHD last year. Thankfully, the results were NEGATIVE. I never took any medicine in regards to my autism in my life, NEVER. Yet, I function pretty well. I function as good if not better than many people with Aspergers Syndrome. I am a straight A student now in College and majoring in Mairne Biology. I am one lucky guy.
I have good social tendancies but I kind of have the same problem of knowing what to say. To make matters wrose, a lot of times crazy or stupid thoughts are in my head and I don't do well in Conversations, fearing I would speak out the crazy or stupid thoughts as words.


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em_tsuj
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21 Feb 2015, 5:52 pm

I don't enough about your situation to offer any advice other than getting a second opinion.



ASS-P
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21 Feb 2015, 6:49 pm

...Well.........



ASS-P
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21 Feb 2015, 6:57 pm

...Well.........