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YippySkippy
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24 Feb 2015, 3:33 pm

Judging by the posts on WP, I'd say it's much more often the case that Aspie men hate Aspie women. At any given time, there are likely to be at least 3 or 4 severely misogynistic threads running, often many pages long and filled with vitriol and offensive memes and videos. Granted, the posters don't usually differentiate between NT and Aspie women, but that only leads me to believe they hate all women equally.



Biemi
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08 Mar 2015, 12:14 am

TBH i think that's a broad generalisation to say that about ASD guys, all of which would be really different. I mean, if you've met one ASD guy, you've met one ASD guy. I think socially, it's more ok for girls to have issues (socially/mentally/whatever) than guys? Like, guys are supposed to internalise everything and be strong and masculine. In that vein, ASD girls would be kind of cute/awkward/eccentric but guys would be pathetic/loners/emasculated, which would just encourage them to take up more radical views. I'd imagine some ASD guys would be susceptible to believing in quite misogynistic ideas if they were really isolated and weren't that great romantically. There's already a school of thought about that whole alpha-male BS/'Men's Rights Activism', and it attracts guys who have social issues and shifts the blame onto the people who are rejecting them, because if you do ___, women will date/have sex with you. That being said, ASD girls still have a lot of social difficulties, and it's not like it's easier for girls.

However, *generally speaking*, when ASD is factored into a relationship, it can be more difficult. E.g., my dad has it. He is painfully romantic and very moral/respectful, but has as much empathy as a brick wall and can't look after himself. I know it's very hard for mum to be constantly managing/organising him, especially with his communication issues and remarkable ability to offend/upset her in the most romantic and well-intentioned method possible. What I have observed in any ASD/NT pairing, is that the relationship will be a bit more challenging, especially if the ASD individual isn't looking after their own mental health or doesn't recognise that they have issues. I know that I have a lot of difficulties in terms of communication, black & white thinking and routine, and it would drive me nuts if I had a relationship with another version of me.

I also think it's hard to take examples from the internet, because people say things they wouldn't say in real life, and it also attracts radical thinkers or whatever.



YippySkippy
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09 Mar 2015, 9:35 am

Quote:
I think socially, it's more ok for girls to have issues (socially/mentally/whatever) than guys?


I think, romantically, an NT guy may be less likely to notice his gf's aspie traits than an NT woman would be to notice a guy's aspie traits. When it comes to same-gender friendships and work relationships, however, I think aspie women have it rougher. Women are generally expected to be more empathetic, more nurturing, more expressive, and more intuitively social than men. A man can stand in a corner at a party, drink a beer, maybe talk to one or two people the whole evening, and that's considered pretty normal. A woman who does the same is often viewed as an unfriendly witch. Women are expected to circle the room, laughing and smiling and fetching things for people.



Jono
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10 Mar 2015, 3:20 am

YippySkippy wrote:
Judging by the posts on WP, I'd say it's much more often the case that Aspie men hate Aspie women. At any given time, there are likely to be at least 3 or 4 severely misogynistic threads running, often many pages long and filled with vitriol and offensive memes and videos. Granted, the posters don't usually differentiate between NT and Aspie women, but that only leads me to believe they hate all women equally.


Out of all the threads currently displayed on the first page of the Love and Dating forum, which ones are misogynistic?



YippySkippy
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10 Mar 2015, 7:15 am

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Out of all the threads currently displayed on the first page of the Love and Dating forum, which ones are misogynistic?


I didn't mention Love and Dating in my post. The idea that this board is particularly misogynistic originates with you.
Why do you think this board is misogynistic? ;)



Edna3362
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10 Mar 2015, 10:38 pm

I can't hate what I never encountered. :D


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yellowtamarin
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11 Mar 2015, 4:10 am

GoofyGreatDane wrote:
I have seen aspie women write things like "aspie women are so much milder than men, men with aspergers are HORRIBLE and creepy. Aspergers is SO much worse in men - I would never date an aspie man."

I doubt it. Please don't exaggerate. Post an actual quote of someone saying something like that, or paraphrase more accurately.



a_dork
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12 Mar 2015, 1:29 am

I don't hate any group of people. I judge each person individually.


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26 Mar 2015, 9:30 am

One would be required to speak in direct specific terms to be with an Aspien.

I have seen a few women do this in my tiny lifetime but it seems not to be the prefered method of seduction.

I don't know much, but my first guess would be that women can not get away with as much with an Aspien as they can with a NT.



f9
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26 Mar 2015, 12:25 pm

Aspie Women -Do You Hate Aspie Men???

Not particularly, no.

Don't believe anyone on super open public places like Yahoo Answers saying they are Aspians…

I agree with most of previous answers/ comments on this thread.

Including evaluating people as individuals not as groups and the bullying bit (I wouldn't want to go back to my age 8 to 18!)!

As for generalizations I tend to get along quite well with other Aspians, including men.

:)



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01 Apr 2015, 11:19 am

I don't hate men on the spectrum -sure there's a few individuals I haven't gotten along with but that was more about not having anything in common with them or not liking their attitude not about them being on the spectrum.

Just because we're all autistic doesn't mean we're all going to be best friends. I've met some people on the spectrum (males and females) that I've been great friends with and others that I don't get along with at all.

Are some females on the spectrum negative towards autistic males? Probably. But you can't say we all are because that's not true.



Haruhi_79
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09 Apr 2015, 12:29 am

No I don't hate them. Some apsie men are more abrasive than others, but my other half is better at navigating socially than I am, although he is also on the spectrum.



cathylynn
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09 Apr 2015, 12:36 am

i was in love with an aspie guy while we were both in school. didn't work out due to religious differences. we were still best friends for four years.



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11 Apr 2015, 7:51 pm

Sunny55 wrote:
No, I don't hate Aspie men. I belong to an AS support group and most of the others in the group are men. I like them all, some more than others, as would be usual in any social group.


I belong to an ASD support group as well, and I don't hate the men, though naturally I like some of them better than others.

We did find, though, that we wanted to start a separate women's-only group, which has been going strong for two and a half years now, because we found that some of the women were not getting heard, and were made uncomfortable by what I shall call the unwanted romantic interest expressed by a handful (a dedicated and consistent handful) of the men. This, of course, makes ASD men no different, except perhaps in degree, from men everywhere. It also felt different because the meetings were/are intended to be a safe space to be ourselves.

As someone noted, societal expectations for women and men are so different that it has often seemed to me that any mixed group has to watch itself so that it doesn't end up playing out a me-Tarzan-you-Jane group dynamic.


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Uncanny_Valerie
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13 Apr 2015, 7:21 pm

No, I like them, and I feel like I'm on the same wavelength with them in a lot of ways.