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Which of the following online dating websites best for people on the spectrum
Poll ended at 01 Mar 2015, 5:13 pm
Plenty of fish 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Tinder 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Match 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Ok Cupid 67%  67%  [ 4 ]
Other 33%  33%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 6

Halfmadgenius
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12 Apr 2015, 7:42 pm

Antharis wrote:
IE You may find someone who unequivocally acts like they want a relationship with you does a 180 when you have sex with them, truly not intending for a relationship but getting a thrill off of conning people that aren't given to promiscuity.
.


This is where a 90 day rule comes in handy. My new boyfriend knows and even agrees its a good idea to wait a few months. If they don't want to wait a while then they aren't worth the time anyway.



Antharis
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12 Apr 2015, 8:03 pm

Halfmadgenius wrote:
Antharis wrote:
IE You may find someone who unequivocally acts like they want a relationship with you does a 180 when you have sex with them, truly not intending for a relationship but getting a thrill off of conning people that aren't given to promiscuity.
.


This is where a 90 day rule comes in handy. My new boyfriend knows and even agrees its a good idea to wait a few months. If they don't want to wait a while then they aren't worth the time anyway.



Good advice, the reason it happened in the first place was my taking a calculated risk to challenge my normal assumptions. I calculated wrong and remembered why my assumptions started in the first place.

Online dating is extremely risky for women, that's the reason you don't see as many of them in such sites.



sly279
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12 Apr 2015, 8:16 pm

Halfmadgenius wrote:
Antharis wrote:
IE You may find someone who unequivocally acts like they want a relationship with you does a 180 when you have sex with them, truly not intending for a relationship but getting a thrill off of conning people that aren't given to promiscuity.
.


This is where a 90 day rule comes in handy. My new boyfriend knows and even agrees its a good idea to wait a few months. If they don't want to wait a while then they aren't worth the time anyway.


I can't wait that long. 3 months. I'd never have sex then. and I'll drive here crazy and a way with my overactive sex drive with no release. might work for you and your bf though. I guess I just need to add finding someone with a overactive sex drive to my small list.



Antharis
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12 Apr 2015, 10:14 pm

You could use your hands. If you don't expect things to last beyond 3 months, then it's not like you weren't expecting to go back to them ultimately.



sly279
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13 Apr 2015, 3:21 am

Antharis wrote:
You could use your hands. If you don't expect things to last beyond 3 months, then it's not like you weren't expecting to go back to them ultimately.


feel guilty and disloyal to think of or look at other women when in a relationship. but also disrespectful to think of the person in relationship with.

yeah but while with them could enjoy sex. though that is if I decide to have sex and feel safe opening up to them. with a lot of women wanting sex in 1-5 dates. I feel me wanting it after a month of regularly dating is ok if not apparently too long.



SilverStar
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14 Apr 2015, 4:54 pm

Antharis wrote:
My interactions with people on online dating sites taught me that people will lie not only about who they are and what they are like, but also about what they WANT (sometimes they won't even be aware they're doing so). This is especially true for men because women are fewer in number in those sites and don't need to compete for others' attention as much.

IE You may find someone who unequivocally acts like they want a relationship with you does a 180 when you have sex with them, truly not intending for a relationship but getting a thrill off of conning people that aren't given to promiscuity.

That is not to say there aren't any honest people, the most prominent just happen to be the ones that shotgun creepy messages.

For someone on the spectrum they appeal quite a bit because they simplify the dating process a lot, and a lot of them champion them until they get burned to a crisp by good old NT social dishonesty.
If you're completely infallible at figuring out when people are lying to you, dating sites are probably wonderful though.




Both men and women, lie equally on those sites.


Men's profiles should actually read something like this:

"I am looking for someone to have a good relationship with, but in the meantime, If you have a decent body, and don't annoy me too much, I will still have sex with you."

Women's should go like this:

"I am looking for someone that's smart, sweet and funny, and likes me for who I am, but this only applies to guys that I find attractive...everyone else, leave me alone."



Antharis
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15 Apr 2015, 12:36 am

SilverStar wrote:
Both men and women, lie equally on those sites.


Completely agree, but keep in mind there's a population discrepancy between genders that makes competition much more grueling for men. Ironically this is because a lot of women feel these sites are unsafe.

You also need to consider the following: When you read a profile, you're ultimately relying on the person's self definition, so even if they aren't trying to lie, their views of themselves may be warped, or they may simply have biases that they do not realize. You're already on shaky grounds by design.

Then you get the picture, photoshopped, ages old, of a similar looking sibling, not even theirs or just dolled up to the point it's not representative of what they look like on an average day. It's not much more reliable.

Honesty is just not a natural thing for humans. It's sh***y but their bodies are usually more honest than their minds are.



sly279
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15 Apr 2015, 3:04 am

SilverStar wrote:
Antharis wrote:
My interactions with people on online dating sites taught me that people will lie not only about who they are and what they are like, but also about what they WANT (sometimes they won't even be aware they're doing so). This is especially true for men because women are fewer in number in those sites and don't need to compete for others' attention as much.

IE You may find someone who unequivocally acts like they want a relationship with you does a 180 when you have sex with them, truly not intending for a relationship but getting a thrill off of conning people that aren't given to promiscuity.

That is not to say there aren't any honest people, the most prominent just happen to be the ones that shotgun creepy messages.

For someone on the spectrum they appeal quite a bit because they simplify the dating process a lot, and a lot of them champion them until they get burned to a crisp by good old NT social dishonesty.
If you're completely infallible at figuring out when people are lying to you, dating sites are probably wonderful though.




Both men and women, lie equally on those sites.


Men's profiles should actually read something like this:

"I am looking for someone to have a good relationship with, but in the meantime, If you have a decent body, and don't annoy me too much, I will still have sex with you."

Women's should go like this:

"I am looking for someone that's smart, sweet and funny, and likes me for who I am, but this only applies to guys that I find attractive...everyone else, leave me alone."


forgot and have a decent job along with being attractive.



jhimmichael
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16 Apr 2015, 2:25 am

Cannbismeetnow.com is my dating site where i met awsome people and recreational marijuana users that helped me to be more expressive and made me more creative in many ways.



mattock
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21 Apr 2015, 5:49 pm

I joined Mariya-club.com. and never regret about my decision. I found everything iv been looking for. Friend lover and much more. If you dreaming to create strong family like I did its exactly what you need. Very easy to use it. You can find few more services on this site. Its very easy to get contact information of the person you like. I suggest it to everyone!



Antharis
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22 Apr 2015, 1:16 am

... wow, we're actually getting ads, so sad.



Metal_Man
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23 Apr 2015, 5:34 pm

As someone who used dating sites back in the very early days and just recently started again I can say that things have really changed and not for the better. In the beginning computers and the internet was the exclusive domain of Aspies, nerds, dorks and geeks. I had much success in meeting good, quality women and had some really good, long term relationships. At that time NT's would not be caught dead even looking at a computer let alone be on the internet because it just wasn't cool.

After ending a long term relationship last year I have ventured back into online dating (Match, POF, OKC) after being away from it for 7 years and it is nothing compared to what it used to be. Now that the technology has filtered down into the unclean, barbarian NT hoards online dating is now the exclusive domain of douche bags and party girls. It is very discouraging and what was once a great way for us to meet people has basically shut us out.


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TiffanyBram
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30 Apr 2015, 4:53 am

www.datememe.com is a new Free dating site!
No credit card required, unlimited messaging, no ads, thousands of profiles.
Join Now! :)



vercingetorix451
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30 Apr 2015, 10:55 am

Never had any luck with them, so I don't bother anymore. I might be convinced to try another if it was folks on the spectrum orientated (that is free of cost).



Comets
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01 May 2015, 11:37 am

1df5e76 wrote:
domanticus wrote:
Which online dating website is best for people on the spectrum?


None. They all suck.


I've tried a couple of niche sites, and even those suck quite a bit. My experience with people was that they were largely dishonest in talking to me. I have no idea how people expect to have a healthy relationship based off of dishonesty. Not just hiding a few things that they're insecure about at first, but flat-out making things up about themselves and their interests.



1df5e76
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01 May 2015, 9:50 pm

Comets wrote:
My experience with people was that they were largely dishonest in talking to me.

My experience is that I meet them once and then they fade without a word when I ask them out again. Of course, this is omitting all the people I didn't want to see again :P