Making friends, losing friends

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This is the greatest pain in my life. I can be both extremely extroverted and extremely introverted, and not alot in between. When extrovert Im the life of the party, musician, comediene, etc. People always want to get to know me, start a friendship. The problem is, they never last. Eventually the calls, or visits, or invites gets less. Then one day I realize that Im no longer in the loop at all. Big parties thrown with no invite. Ill hear about so called friends getting married after the fact.

Id like to think this just happens to me, so I can feel really sorry for myself, but I kinda think its maybe more universal than that. Yes?

im not one to really be an extrovert or even really swing back and forth so much in my mannerisms... have you looked into BP maybe?

but of the few good friends i've managed to pick up along the way... i know i've treated them like crap cause when i move away for school or whatever... I SUCK at keeping in touch... and so i'm not surprised that they rarely call me anymore and that i know practically nothing of their life anymore, though i think of them daily.

generally though... when i move someplace new... i'm readily accepted by people... cause i know i'm passible, though not overly extroverted by any means... but i know what you mean when you say you slowly get fewer and fewer invites to social functions...

some days i care... other days i just play wow and work and a draw and surf the net and hike and pretty much do whatever i want w/o giving it a second though.

I swing between extravert and introvert but maybe not to that extreme. I can't say I ever really enjoyed a party, well maybe only one or two.

I can make friends but to try and explain to someone why I want to see them and go out, and talk one week, but feel like 'hiding in my shell' and not seeing anyone the next week is very difficult, and must be very hard to understand. I have a few close friends who do seem to understand but most people don't.

Not BP, at least not the classic sense. Im a bit like the woman portrayed in the Mozart movie. But when I get my feelings hurt, I get devestated and go the complete opposite into introvert side. Hide away and all that.

And I know that Im hard to handle, and can understand people tiring of me, but really wish there was another way to be let go, or rejected, other than through simple avoidance. Maybe just being honest and telling me its getting tiring would be easier.

C'est La Vie

Man, do I understand this pain or what!! ! Seems when I get a little drunk or relaxed, i'm like gravity. People wanna hear what I have to say, laugh out loud and have a good time. But if Im sober or depressed, it aint gonna happen. If Im just normal that day, people avoid me like the plague.

Ive been told Im a good guy, a great writer, funny, and most of all, that I leave an impression. But I too wonder alone, if I leave an impression, why do you forget about me?

Being autistic is a lot like being the jester back in the old days of kingdoms. You're only good enough for an audience when called upon...

Yeah. It reminds me of a line from a song I can't remember the title of - 'players only love you when you're playing', something like that anyway.

nicely put

I think that song was by Fleetwood Mac. Don't remember the name, though.

Tim

Yes it was! Fleetwood Mac's song Dreams - thanks, it was bugging me that I couldn't remember it.

Yeah, very nicely put. sad thing that though. One of the things Ive learned about AS is that the love and the concept of friendship are not the same as "normal" people. I liken it to an old Twilight Zone episode. Group of soldiers in the army, buds, except one guy who is kinda slow but really friendly but kinda stupid but what the hell lets let him come along kinda a guy. They use him for jokes etc. Then one day they come up with this really cool joke. They have a fake grenade, and are going to pretend its a real one, and act like the pins pulled to freak the funny guy out. Except instead of freaking him out, he reacts instinctively and throws his body on top of the grenade and screams "RUN". That guy always struck me as autistic.