How to discourage adolescence behaviour?

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vikrampreet
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07 Mar 2015, 6:00 pm

Hello. Our son who is very autistisch adolescence has new habit. He now is removing his diaper in his bed during each night time. We believe he is doing masturbation which our Sikh faith has condemned so it is serious for us. He is low function not verbal and we can not expect him learning we believe this behaviour is wrong but we wish that it stops. The other problem is that when he does not have the diaper he makes waste on his body and bed during his sleeping time which is filth and difficult cleaning. Clean is very important for Sikh people. We can not yet teach him keeping on the diaper. Can this be made possible? If we can not teach him this thing can we make removing diaper not possible for him? Thank you. Vikrampreet.



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07 Mar 2015, 7:43 pm

They make locking plastic pants. Fetware is a place to get them but the company is in the USA so I am not sure how much shipping would be to India.


http://www.fetware.com/locking-waist-pl ... p-112.html


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lostonearth35
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07 Mar 2015, 7:53 pm

This has been bothering me for ages now. Why is masturbation seen as being so wrong and evil when these days having sex with another person can end up killing you? Even people who aren't really religious seem to think it's really sick and something to be ashamed of. Of course the varied opinions I'll get from asking this will just add to my confusion. :(



Sweetleaf
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07 Mar 2015, 8:03 pm

Well unfortunately the honest answer is there is no healthy way to stop adolescent behavior.


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07 Mar 2015, 8:07 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
This has been bothering me for ages now. Why is masturbation seen as being so wrong and evil when these days having sex with another person can end up killing you? Even people who aren't really religious seem to think it's really sick and something to be ashamed of. Of course the varied opinions I'll get from asking this will just add to my confusion. :(


I get the point of your question. However, I'm not sure this is the right place to ask it as this person has clearly stated their religious beliefs and I think we should be respectful, even if we don't understand or agree.

FWIW, most people I know do not think it is sick or something to be ashamed of, just that it is something private. I have no idea how old you really are (lostonearth35) because I understand there are problems with the age calculator, but assuming you are an adult, I think that your choices and views on this topic are totally up to you, and can be kept private, so no one has to know how you feel about it or what your personal choice is.


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07 Mar 2015, 8:16 pm

I thought the OP was concerned about his child removing his diaper and getting his feces and urine all over.


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07 Mar 2015, 8:22 pm

League_Girl wrote:
I thought the OP was concerned about his child removing his diaper and getting his feces and urine all over.


I think it is a combination...but your solution should help all the way around.


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vikrampreet
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07 Mar 2015, 8:42 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
This has been bothering me for ages now. Why is masturbation seen as being so wrong and evil when these days having sex with another person can end up killing you? Even people who aren't really religious seem to think it's really sick and something to be ashamed of. Of course the varied opinions I'll get from asking this will just add to my confusion. :(


Here is something from a Sikh Website that will explain our belief about this:

"What is the Sikh attitude towards masturbation?
Lust or uncontrolled sexual desire is one of the five evils that Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji warns us about time and time again. Masturbation, also referred to as Self-Sex, involves lustful thoughts that inspires or encourages more sexual thoughts and acts, and is therefore not appropriate for a Sikh to engage in. This is mostly seen in adolescence period as they want to satisfy their sexual needs. It is for self pleasure (sexual pleasure using with own or others hands or objects).

In the Sikh way of life masturbation is not considered an acceptable option for quenching physical desire. The Sikh of the Guru has the best option to search for and find the TRUE source of satisfaction and fulfilment in life. Master your mind at this age and you will master the world while quite young."

Yes, my post was concerned about both masturbation and soiling. Thank you very much for the helpful answers.



bb400guy
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07 Mar 2015, 9:00 pm

I'm sorry, I respect all beliefs and faiths, but you have a serious error in judgment. Your son simply cannot be held to your faiths religious standards because of how his ASD affects him. I'd think that would be obvious to any parent, caregiver or god who created and is watching over him.


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Last edited by bb400guy on 07 Mar 2015, 9:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

vikrampreet
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07 Mar 2015, 9:18 pm

We are not expecting him understand the significant of our belief. We simply do not want him doing a thing our belief said is harmful.