A Bit Rough

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Hi everyone! I could use a bit of support at the moment. It's not something I usually ask for, but I think I might need some and I figure if anyone could help, it would be the lovely people on this forum.
Recently I got rather involved with a friend for a couple months. It was fun and I appreciated the time because I was able to figure out some things about myself that I hadn't had the opportunity to do before because I didn't have history (and therefore established trust) with previous partners. The agreement was that when it came time to part ways when either of us wished to start a real relationship with another person, we would let go of this side of our friendship amicably and return to strictly friends, as we always had been in the past.
My friend recently decided that he wanted something more, and found a girl he wished to start that with. However, he did not mention to me that he was thinking about dating again, or that he had found someone, or that he was starting to see this someone. I didn't hear from him all week, and the next time I saw him he had brought a date to one of our outings with friends.
I was very surprised and a bit upset, because clearly he had been keeping it away from me. I expected him to explain himself shortly after, but again I heard nothing from him. I contacted him and asked to come speak to him the next day, which he agreed to. Once I got there, we did talk. He explained that he wanted to start dating again, and I assured him that if that was something he needed to do and thought it was the right direction for him, then I was happy for him.
I reminded him that we were still friends, as we always had been, and he agreed. I let him know that I expected to still be a part of his life even though he had a girlfriend. I don't need much but I do need to be included and remembered. My good friends and I share that sentiment and I detailed that to him and he seemed to understand and was happy to agree.
It's been a bit of time since then and I've come to the realization that we probably can not be friends anymore. When he has a girlfriend, he puts her above all else, even above his friendships. I don't think that's particularly healthy, but if it works for him I suppose that's all that matters. But it doesn't work for me. I need friends who take the time to fit me into their lives, even if there isn't a lot of space. He isn't doing that for me and so I do not think it best to continue to attempt to waste energy keeping the friendship alive since his priorities aren't changing for the better any time soon.
It's just so incredibly difficult to do. I miss the connection and intimacy very badly. I didn't miss it before because I've never had the opportunity to have it in any quantity before, but now that I have, it scares me that I have to do without it again. I think the Aspergers is the reason why I'm having this difficult a time returning to "normal". Like most Aspies, I keep only a tiny group of carefully selected friends and am very removed from much of the contact other people take for granted, emotional connection, social connection, physical connection. But for this friend I was free and willing to explore all sorts of connection and I loved it but only because it was with that particular person and I trusted and felt safe enough to explore. Now that that door is closed, I have to also close the door on all those new experiences. I realize that in the future I will have the opportunity to explore them once more with another person(s) but at the moment I do not have any people to do that with and am not seeing any prospects and it's very depressing. I know that I will get over that. Time heals wounds. But at the moment I'm very fixated on the notion that I'm taking a step back on the progress ladder. Also it hurts. A lot. I had no idea that connection could be like that. I don't regret going with it but it does make for an unpleasant time when it ends. I can't imagine what I would be like if it had been a legitimate long-term relationship that I was ending instead of this. I'm honestly a bit frightened of that and I will be extremely careful with that, I think.
Thank you for listening to me. I don't need any personal stories, or advice on how to get the friend back (it's not a good fit in the long run anyway), or anything like that. I just wanted to sort through my feelings to understand them better. Until Time starts putting things into better perspective, I will weather through.

I have been there before, so I can understand exactly how you feel. The breakup with my first girlfriend really screwed me up for a while. All that I can say, is that it just takes time, and other distractions, to get your mind away from that feeling.

Update: It's gotten a bit more confusing now. I wanted to double check that we were both leaning towards parting ways entirely so I asked him how he felt about it. Turns out he's having his own issues and is putting way too much pressure on himself and seems to think that the appropriate way to handle that is to just pack up and walk away because it will be "better" for his friends. So... instead of working through my issues, I now have to shove them aside and give it one good shot at setting the boy straight with life in general. I'm not sure how that's going to turn out. Communication is not my strong suit...