Replies selectively on okcupid

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autismthinker21
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04 May 2015, 8:12 pm

Who_Am_I wrote:
I can't imagine why women wouldn't want to reply to you, OP. Those teasing sluts.


i cant imagine how the site with women have to much detail and how their lives are to complex. some are high school only some are just college. to much info in one profile brings up boring details. i mean hell what is making every women feeling so great. oh i dont message guys that dont like dogs. thats not the case. many men on there message about their dogs to. they just like to ignore all and leave on there. you can report threatening activity and kick them off the site for harassing a member for saying about you might be a victim of my killing spree. and no every website has no background check at all. so they say report when there is a issue.


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autismthinker21
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04 May 2015, 8:13 pm

izzeme wrote:
indeed, most women on okc have red reply flags.
however; most messages send by guys to girls are of the level "hy sxxy, wnna bone?"
if they dont respond to such messages (which they shouldn't, imo), they get red flags.

you want to clean out those that have some form of self-worth which causes them to only respond to serious messages?


heck, i have a red flag on there as well, and i'm a guy... i often get messages from escort services (one reverse image search unmasks them); which i don't take time to respond to either; they have similar first messages (indeed of the "hey, you single, want me to come over" type).
oh thats cool. where do you get messages from women like that? i never did hardly except one.


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autismthinker21
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04 May 2015, 8:14 pm

SabbraCadabra wrote:
autismthinker21 wrote:
what every guy that makes messages of something dirty or something they don't like wont respond at all?


Yeah, that sounds about right.

I've seen and been told about some of the awful messages that girls constantly receive. I think I'd be pretty turned off by dating sites, too, if if I had guys lining up to tell me about the things they like to do with their tongues.[/quote

how many dates have you been on?


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autismthinker21
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04 May 2015, 8:28 pm

SabbraCadabra wrote:
autismthinker21 wrote:
what every guy that makes messages of something dirty or something they don't like wont respond at all?


Yeah, that sounds about right.

I've seen and been told about some of the awful messages that girls constantly receive. I think I'd be pretty turned off by dating sites, too, if if I had guys lining up to tell me about the things they like to do with their tongues.

and you had this happen?


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SabbraCadabra
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04 May 2015, 8:56 pm

I'm not a female.


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Who_Am_I
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05 May 2015, 3:29 am

autismthinker21 wrote:
Who_Am_I wrote:
I can't imagine why women wouldn't want to reply to you, OP. Those teasing sluts.


i cant imagine how the site with women have to much detail and how their lives are to complex. some are high school only some are just college. to much info in one profile brings up boring details. i mean hell what is making every women feeling so great. oh i dont message guys that dont like dogs. thats not the case. many men on there message about their dogs to. they just like to ignore all and leave on there. you can report threatening activity and kick them off the site for harassing a member for saying about you might be a victim of my killing spree. and no every website has no background check at all. so they say report when there is a issue.


... pardon?


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The_Face_of_Boo
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05 May 2015, 3:45 am

*Scratching head* what the....



Agemaki
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07 May 2015, 5:32 am

When I was on OkCupid I met my share of interesting fellows. There are the ones that have to be blocked because they won't take "no" for an answer, the ones that try to manipulate you into liking them by telling you that all other guys play mind games to get sex, the guys who use weird pick up lines instead of actual conversation and the ones who just send out generic "hey sexy" messages. I tended to exchange messages with those had something of substance to say (there were quite a few) but there were just too many of the above sort to reply to all. Since many would keep messaging even if I said I wasn't interested (I therefore had to block them) replying in the first place seemed like it only encouraged them. I met my husband on OKCupid (I messaged him) and he did not experience any of this. I imagine gender has something to do with it.



autismthinker21
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07 May 2015, 5:51 pm

Gender? So I am a bad taste for women on the messed up site. Unbelievable.


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Agemaki
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08 May 2015, 4:50 am

autismthinker21 wrote:
Gender? So I am a bad taste for women on the messed up site. Unbelievable.



I'm not sure I understand what you are saying. There are certainly ways of optimizing first messages to women to have higher response rates and I'd be happy to give any advice. Though of course ultimately I am speaking from my own experience.



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08 May 2015, 7:15 am

Agemaki wrote:
When I was on OkCupid I met my share of interesting fellows. There are the ones that have to be blocked because they won't take "no" for an answer, the ones that try to manipulate you into liking them by telling you that all other guys play mind games to get sex, the guys who use weird pick up lines instead of actual conversation and the ones who just send out generic "hey sexy" messages. I tended to exchange messages with those had something of substance to say (there were quite a few) but there were just too many of the above sort to reply to all. Since many would keep messaging even if I said I wasn't interested (I therefore had to block them) replying in the first place seemed like it only encouraged them. I met my husband on OKCupid (I messaged him) and he did not experience any of this. I imagine gender has something to do with it.



Ok, I will just answer your reply, because yours is the only one I can read. :D

I believe the male to female ratio is a little lopsided on those sites, which gives females a larger selection to pick from than males, which means that there will be more males that get rejected. With more rejection comes more frustration, and more desperation, which is why women get all of these "annoying" messages.

To level out the playing field, and to reduce the superficial tendancies of those sites, they need to have a 50/50 male to female ratio, only allow the females to message the guys first, and not allow photo sharing, until you get to know each other first.



sly279
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08 May 2015, 5:15 pm

SilverStar wrote:
Agemaki wrote:
When I was on OkCupid I met my share of interesting fellows. There are the ones that have to be blocked because they won't take "no" for an answer, the ones that try to manipulate you into liking them by telling you that all other guys play mind games to get sex, the guys who use weird pick up lines instead of actual conversation and the ones who just send out generic "hey sexy" messages. I tended to exchange messages with those had something of substance to say (there were quite a few) but there were just too many of the above sort to reply to all. Since many would keep messaging even if I said I wasn't interested (I therefore had to block them) replying in the first place seemed like it only encouraged them. I met my husband on OKCupid (I messaged him) and he did not experience any of this. I imagine gender has something to do with it.



Ok, I will just answer your reply, because yours is the only one I can read. :D

I believe the male to female ratio is a little lopsided on those sites, which gives females a larger selection to pick from than males, which means that there will be more males that get rejected. With more rejection comes more frustration, and more desperation, which is why women get all of these "annoying" messages.

To level out the playing field, and to reduce the superficial tendancies of those sites, they need to have a 50/50 male to female ratio, only allow the females to message the guys first, and not allow photo sharing, until you get to know each other first.

idk that that would help. it still lets women window shop, making men a object to shop for rather than a mate.
perhaps if women and men from the site started hooking upt and their profiles were removed it might work, but if not the other women would reject men for the guy who already got hooked up not knowing he did.



autismthinker21
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08 May 2015, 6:19 pm

why cant women just say they wanna buy a man on the site. jeez makes things so much easier. but no. they dont message. and thats how the red flags are up.


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Hoggy
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08 May 2015, 6:46 pm

If someone is orange so showing as "replies selectively" Then they reply to 10-35% of their FIRST messages they receive from someone.

Being red is below 10% which the majority of matches will be with the odd oranges and rare green. (If your Male looking at Females)

But if your getting 10-100 messages a day being red is all but a given, especially with all the shotgun messages people send out "hey" "hi how are you" and many other variants. Not counting the rude and sexual posts I've seen girls receive

If your a women looking at guys then the majority will be green.

I'm the same as most guys on there with a dead inbox and people who dont reply. I've never shotgunned messages i always write something relevant to their profile. But that's just how it is on most of these sites so i dont have a big problem with it.



autismthinker21
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08 May 2015, 6:51 pm

The internet is coloredblind.


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