How do you engage with people?

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This is the latest catchcry at work: "You must engage with your clients!"

Only I don't really know what it means to engage with people. Does that mean attract their attention? Maintain eye contact? Keep them interested? Pretend like you're their best friend? Or what??

It all seems rather vague to me.

What is your job?

I feel like they have a particular type of "engagement" in mind that is relative to your line of work; if that's the case, it's hard to advise without a sense of what the gig is.

^ Disability Support.

Prepare a business case for modifying your job duties to minimize your interactions with clients. I did and it worked. (I am really, really, really not a "people person" and my skills are such that my employer was happy amend my responsibilities to suit my needs. My last two employers were too!).

I used to work in disabilities, and this prerequisite is one of the reasons I refuse to work in this sector again, no matter how flat broke I am. I think what they mean is you must chummy up to your clients so they like you personally. This in turn makes the client more comfortable if you're performing personal care for them, instead of feeling they're being handled by some stranger. 'Engage' seems to mean create a kind of superficial friendship with the client. However, from my perspective, this was inappropriate as I'm uncomfortable sharing personal information with people who aren't also in the same situation - like here for example. I don't talk about autism to just anyone, but am fine talking about it to other autistics. It didn't work out because I refused to be "friends" with clients.

^ Ah, I see. So it's basically the old "you must build a rapport with your client" reworded.
Sorry you had a bad time in DS. I find the clients themselves are generally great to work with - it's all the stupid, mumbo jumbo, posturing, opinionated, sketchy, contradictory BS that comes from those who are apparently not disabled that does my head in.
Thanks.

There's a difference between engaging clients and being fake-chummy with them or telling them intimate details of your medical history.

^ This, or perhaps engaging the Borg?

Find something about the "target" that you genuinely like. Maybe it's an old lady who you can once imagine was beautiful, maybe it's a kid who is being a jerk to his parents and the parents deserve it, maybe it's a person with a cool shirt. Whatever. Find something likeable. Find something you like about your target material. Let's say you have to give out fliers for work. Maybe it's for cell phones and you doubt anyone will care and mostly you don't either, but I'm sure something about it is okay. Then connect the thing you like about your stuff and the likeable thing about your target in your head. Think, "That guy with the cool shirt might be interested in streaming Game of Thrones free for a few months" then just talk to him. It doesn't help every time but it makes it easier.

I interpret it as finding out more about them and what they need/want etc. I guess it comes down to what type of stakeholder they are. If they have a high interest in the outcomes of what you are doing and also high influence over them too, then you would want to engage with them regularily and always try and accomodate their needs. Clients are like any relationahip, they need regular comms and care and want to feel valued, listened to and appreciated. Ignore them, and they can become somebody elses clients real easy.

The thing is, a lot of people like superficial, so I give them what they want. The client is always right. Because they pay the bills.

I worked for a retail chain once that emphasized the acronym g.u.e.s.t.: greet, understand, educate, satisfy, & thank. Maybe with the help of our wp community we can invent an acronym for e.n.g.a.g.e. that will knock the socks off of your employers?

My best suggestions:

1. Let your clients talk about themselves. People, generally, like talking about themselves and their families. Let them do that while you sit back and LISTEN. They will tell you what they want.

2. Learn to LISTEN. Look at whoever is talking to you and repeat back to them what they said in different terms.
For example:
Client says, "I bought a new car."
You reply, "What car did you buy?"

3. Ask open ended questions and avoid Yes or No type questions whenever possible. This encourages the other person in the conversation to elaborate and talk more about whatever the topic is. Again, just listen and reply as you need to. Sometimes that is difficult for us, given our ASD, but it CAN be learned.


Good luck!! !


FF

Clients or customers will definitely go elsewhere.

This. I do almost no in-person interactions, but spend a fair amount of time on the telephone with clients. This is great, because when I don't have to try to interpret facial expressions/body language I'm much more capable of "engaging" in conversation, and rules like this were the foundation that let me develop this set of skills.

People like to talk about themselves, and they'll tell you what they want to hear.

I totally can't do this in person, though. Far too much mental processing involved there, and by the time I figure out what they're talking about the conversation's been over for hours.