The Rosie Project

Post Reply New Topic

https://www.textpublishing.com.au/books ... ie-project

I have just read this wonderful novel which is written from the unusual perspective of an adult man who doesn't know he is on the spectrum (though the author knows) and it is very heartwarming. The genetics professor who is the central character very much reminds me of my son-in-law who is also unaware (we think) and is a professor - he could almost have been the model for this novel in his bachelor days.

It's very understanding and sympathetic to all ASD quirks and the problems of living under NT dominance, whether diagnosed or not.. and it has lovely humour too. It deservedly won lots of prizes.

Only gripe is that the author is described as Australian. Not so!! ! He lives in Australia now, but he is a Kiwi, born and bred, from Auckland (where I live

any link for the part 2 book?

Sorry, I don't know of one. I got a copy through the library. Have heard from others since I originally posted who are on the spectrum or married to an HFA and they really liked the novel too.

It's interesting you say that B19. My wife read the book too and said the main character reminded her so much of myself. So I borrowed The Rosie Project from the local library. I just didn't get any of the humour at all that my wife thought was so funny. And I didn't see any connection at all with the main character apart from the fact that we are both scientists.

One of the things that has been most unsettling to me about discovering my own autism in my late 40s is the conversations I have had with my wife about it. We would be reading something about Aspergers as part of understanding my son's diagnosis and she would say that a trait of his was obviously inherited from me--when I did not think of myself as being or seeming like that at all. During the assessment, she said things about me to the doctor which were completely unlike the way I thought of myself and all this helped me to understand that not only am I relatively unskilled in interpreting others, I am also unskilled in understanding how I may come across to others, even my wife.

The good part is that we can talk about it now and she can tell me when I am missing things that are important to her. The bad thing is... being aware of areas of incompetence that I was previously blind to. It's unsettling in a sort of seismic way.

I'm one of the many many descendants of the Scottish poet Burns (he was a busy man!) and his best known one liner is perhaps "Oh to see ourselves as others see us.."

Generally speaking, I doubt that hardly anyone - on or off the spectrum - has 20/20 vision in that respect. 20 different people will see the same person as 20 different people.

I think it was Adrienne Rich who said "We don't see others as they are, we see them as we are". And there seems to me a lot of human truth in that.

My daughter and her husband took turns reading chapters of The Rosie Project aloud to one another. They both collapsed (they said) into hopeless giggles over the chilli icecream (a great favourite of my son-in-law's) and the rigid rota for recipes/meals, in which he saw a reflection of his own behaviour in a new light. It increased understanding in them both, changed the way they saw minor sources of annoyances before into charming quirks, and brought them closer together. In a purely academic sense, my son in law is the cleverest person in the extended family - we all use him as the family knowledge bank when we don't understand something - confident that he will know. And he always does! As a bachelor scientist, pre-marriage, he never saw his routines as exceptional to the norm - it was just what he did and how he did things, and he lived his life perfectly well on that basis. My daughter - very NT but familiar with and used to people on the spectrum (guess why!! she had been surrounded by them since birth) really did kind of grow up with a foot in two worlds, if I can put it like that - like a bilingual person who has spoken two languages from infancy. She is fluent in both, and this novel enabled them to have meaningful mutually affectionate conversations about some differences (and their long ago courtship stage) that they had never had before.

The key to their fairly happy 18 years of marriage has been mutual respect for those differences, on a base of great mutual affection. In every sense, they have pooled their personal resources so that the sum is greater than the parts. But as to the courtship, my daughter long ago realised at an early stage, that if she didn't direct the friendship towards something more (rather than waiting for him to 'woo' her!), they would never get anywhere. In a lot of ways my son-in-law could have been the spark of the idea for the author's novel, though so far as any of us know, they have never met. I suspect that Simsion drew on his own experience to create this endearing portrait of his main character.

PS This is no doubt one reason why I have a bit of an intolerance issue when I read posts on WP from NT spouses who come to WP to complain about their marital partners for being on the spectrum, as if that was an unacceptable insult to themselves somehow. A 'good' marriage IMO isn't putting pressure on someone else to change and mimic onself so that he/she can fill the voids and needs of the 'perfect' partner. That mindset makes me shudder, actually. Not so much a marriage in the true sense of the word as a set of endless expectations and demands. We get those at work, hopefully not from those we marry as nearest and dearest partners in our life journey. But then I am on the spectrum, so what would I know! (lol)

I'd say that out of all the bestselling books written by neurotypical authors about autistic characters, The Rosie Project is my favourite. It is a genuinely amusing novel that would stand on its own merits even if all references to autism were removed.

An interesting thing about this book is that Tillman steals genetic material from Dr Peter Enticott, a character with the same name as a real life Australian autism researcher. This suggests to me that Simsion did his research, and genuinely cares about representing autism accurately, or at least positively. He also hits the right notes in the opening pages, by invoking neurodiversity and with the "Aspies Rule" bit.

One scene that really stood out was where Don Tillman became the world's greatest cocktail mixer overnight. That scene was hilarious, but I'm concerned that neurotypical audiences will think that sort of thing is ordinary for autistics. (It's more fun than counting match sticks, I guess.) The virtuoso cocktail mixing, and the part where he writes a 300 page proposal on autism for a con, seem too ridiculous to be realistic.

Another cringe-worthy bit was when he listed all the problems he had with empathy, I think it was chapter 35. The paragraph where he decided it he ought to respect religion, even though he knew it was incorrect, really irritated me. There are a few lists in the book, like when he considers doing his housework in the first chapter, and that's a trope I've seen in a few neurotypical authored books about autism, like Curious Incident and House Rules. I'm guessing its how authors show their readers that their narrators are logical and meticulous. But it bothers me because I've never seen it replicated in actual autistic writing, like on this site.

I've only read the first book, but I wouldn't be surprised if Don withdrew from the relationship and Rosie logged onto an online forum like this one for advice on how to fix things. The speed with which Don changes his attitude and gets married could well foreshadow a breakdown - it would for me, at least.

Part of what makes Tillman an interesting character is his apparent amorality. He's willing to hack into a university database to book into a restaurant under another academic's name, steal genetic material and use his university's genetic tech without permission for the Father Project. Add that with his martial arts expertise and occasional feats of savantism, and I think you'd have a compelling story if he ever turned to the dark side.

As for me personally, I didn't identify with the character and no one has ever pointed similarities between him and me. Going by how I behave at parties, I'm more of a Mr Darcy from Pride and Prejudice.

https://www.textpublishing.com.au/books ... sie-effect

thanks...... heard it will have a movie adaptation

http://www.theguardian.com/film/2015/ju ... ie-project

I'd never heard of the book before I told my boss I have Asperger's. She was reading the book at the time and ever since she found out I have an ASD, she's been really nice and accommodating towards me.
She's even letting me change desks because where I'm sitting right now is too noisy and I'm seated right near the door - too many people coming and going.

29.99 for an ebook?! That's one in a series?!

I read it for no cost at all, other than the annual property taxes I pay to local government, part of which are used to fund our wonderful libraries where you can take out books for 3 weeks without any charge.

Civilization. Brilliant concept. Thanks for mentioning this, I will go visit that place and see if they have it.