Is this unethical?

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So what I'm getting is that you're only dating this girl so you can say you have a girlfriend?
End it. She deserves better than to be a prop for your ego.

If you are not in a committed relationship, then no, it isn't exactly unethical. But she does deserve to know that you are dating others, so that she can make decisions for herself, based on the truth, and not based on what you're leading her to believe.

I understand that you think that she isn't physically attractive. Physical attraction is nice, but it isn't the only type of attraction. If you can't find anything else in this girl that makes you attracted to her, then I don't see why you should waste her time, or yours. She isn't an experiment. She's a person. She might also have her own difficulties in relationships, which would make it even more unfair for you to use her.

Relationships haven't come easy for me, either. I have also learned the hard way, that when you try to force it, with someone you aren't compatible with, neither of you will be happy. It will just be a lot of stress that will make it that much harder to enter a relationship with someone who is better suited to you, in the future.

Something to consider..

You keep saying that you don't know how women think or what they want.. Stop trying to figure that out. You never will. They are all unique and individual, with their own wants and desires. Yes, a lot will expect you to treat them a certain way and "be a man". But you aren't that type of "man". You are simply you. Any woman with those standards just isn't going to be for you. I know this, because they aren't going to be for me, either. Believe it or not, there really are some women out there, who don't care about standard dating and social cues.. They really don't have those expectations. And sometimes, all it takes, is telling her upfront, that you don't understand these things, and that anything she wants, she's going to have to tell you, or you'll never figure it out. Again, most won't understand this or care to understand. And that's fine, because you only need one who will.

I personally am socially awkward, immature, lacking in experience, and completely stupid when it comes to understanding relationships and dating.. I got started later, too.. And I do get where you're coming from. But I can tell you that I went through two relationships, in 5 years time, that I would actually consider to be a terrible ordeal, rather than something that felt good and taught me things. In fact, these relationships just made me think less of myself, and want to give up even more.

I can tell you, that it actually does get easier, when you give up trying to figure out how to please others, and just try to please yourself. Look for what you want in a relationship, first... I never thought that anybody could love me for who I am.. I always thought that I had to bend over backwards trying to please the other person, at the expense of my own happiness.. And I think that lack of experience at younger ages, and wanting desperately to just experience any type of a relationship, tends to put us in this position. I'm telling you this now, because I wish that I'd considered years ago, before the other two relationships, that I can be wanted and loved, too... That I don't have to try so hard to please someone else.

Forcing relationships, or practicing on someone, is just generally a bad idea, no matter the circumstance. People always end up getting hurt. Everyone keeps telling you that she could get hurt by your actions, but you are at risk for getting hurt, too.

Your experience with one person, will also teach you nothing about the next. People are not that simple.

Back in September, I finally did end up in a relationship with someone who was willing to understand me, and work with me. She's not what people would consider to be physically attractive, but she's beautiful to me. She's also immature and socially awkward.. And enjoys doing a lot of the same things that I like to do. Relationships really don't have to be that complicated.. for any of us.

The last thing that I want to say.. And you might laugh at the suggestion.. But if you're not happy with online dating sites, and you're wanting something where it's easier for guys than it is for girls, try virtual chat. In these programs, the male to female ratio is severely unbalanced, in the male's favor. If you're looking to rush, in taking things to meeting in person, this probably won't be for you. But if you're wanting more experience in relating to women, this will provide that. And if you make a real connection to someone, it very much can lead to meeting in person. I've done this before, and I know a few others who have had successful relationships that way.

I know this was long, but I hope it helps, at least a little. I actually created an account, just to respond to this, because I've been in your position, and I get it. Do what you think will make you happy. But try to be careful with everyone, including yourself.

I once dated a guy who was hurting over being dumped by a previous girlfriend. He could be fun sometimes but looking back I think that he was mainly interested in me as a way of making up for the rejection of his ex. He wasn't that attracted to me and after about a year he finally realized it and broke up with me.

It can really hurt a person's self-esteem to be in that position. Please don't do this.

Virtual chat? Back in the day I met a couple of women through IRC and had a lovely time. I did learn one quasi-unfortunate lesson, though. Back then, a lot of the kinds of women cruising IRC channels and other chat rooms who were up for meeting me were hiding behind the internet for a reason. After getting to know these girls a little bit IRL it didn't take long to realize there would not be a second date.

If I were going to get back into that, I'd go with something like Second Life or Inworlds, which is just relay chat with 3D graphics.

It will only help with your confidence, if the relationship is good. For me, I slipped further behind, got more down on myself.. I felt like I couldn't do anything right, and shouldn't even bother. I was questioning my own words and actions more than I had before my first relationship. One thing that people like us have to look out for, that I never considered, is that there are others who actually want relationships with us, because they feel that they can boss us around and treat us bad, and we won't leave, because they see us as that desperate. Which was actually the standard for my first relationship. And sadly, she was right. I wasn't going anywhere. I was in my late 20's and believed this was my one chance. I also thought that if I just tried harder, I could make her happy, and she'd love me, too. I know now that I didn't love her. But I didn't know that, at the time. Yes, I am aware how pathetic I sound. But, I did it to myself, so I don't really have anyone to blame but me.

Virtual chat would be things like Second Life or IMVU. There's others out there, but those are the two big ones that I know of. Just dress your avatar up nice, or get someone to help you dress it up, if you don't feel confident to do it yourself. The idea is to be attracted to the ladies. The male to female ratio is so unbalanced, you should have women wanting to talk to you almost immediately. I do caution to take your time and get to know them. Do not assume that because someone is in a female avatar, that they are female in real life. Just like anywhere else online, you have people who have fake pics, or claim they are single when they are married.. That sort of thing. So yes.. Just take it slow and keep your options open, until you really know you have a strong connection with someone.

Based on your recent posts, I think that you have a lot to learn about how to develop a meaningful relationship.

JakJak going on second life or IMVU sounds like an excellent idea for me (when I have the time, I know people say there's always time for dating but I'm doing a double paced TAFE class and a 3/4 full time job. My rest time is literally for resting. I'm not a quick study and the only remedy is to study longer).

If I could ask more questions about it, is it voice chat or text chat? Is there a way to narrow the search down to girls from Adelaide, not the other side of the world?