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darkphantomx1
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31 May 2015, 7:49 pm

How can anyone be proud of being autistic? You've read the statistics. A good majority of us are unemployed, live on social security benefits, don't drive, have very few to no friends, in our 20s and never dated, don't drive, don't go to college. How can anyone be proud of that? Autism makes you unique? Unique don't mean s**t when you're depressed all the time because you have no friends and can't get a job because of your differences or when you're living on your own off of SSI or Medicaid and unemployed. A good majority of us are losers; we're misunderstood by neurotypicals, we're nerds, we have no friends, we work low pay minimum wage job, our only friends are our parents. Some of us don't even parents to help us anymore.

That's the sad truth for many of you. Half of your autistic brothers and sisters will live a life like this because of autism. Yes, even many of you with HFA will live like this. Because you were born different, because you were born with autism. You never could live up to your full potential.

So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.



justanothersara
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31 May 2015, 7:55 pm

You have to remember that tons of NTs are on medicaid SSI etc and they don't even have the problems that we do. Just because you don't have autism doesn't mean you'd be successful. Everyone has a struggle.



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31 May 2015, 8:03 pm

So basically, just because you feel that way about being Autistic has to mean the rest of us should, too.
Who said I even wanted to date and most people where I live can't get a decent job, NT or not.

Fine. Go drink your bleach or whatever "cure" the quack doctors create next while I continue being proud of being a loser. :roll:

when I was a kid I used to hear how people with all kinds of physical and mental disabilities can live decent lives. People who can't hear or see or get around without a wheelchair have successful, happy lives, so why is it so horrible for people with Autism?



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31 May 2015, 8:14 pm

I don't know...but it would sure as heck feel better to feel proud than it does to feel depressed.


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ASPartOfMe
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31 May 2015, 9:24 pm

As you say we/our autism are misunderstood and even hated. That is their fault not ours or our autisms fault. I can't say I am proud because of the circumstance of what I was born with, but I don't loath myself for it either. As Frank Sinatra sang "Regrets, I've had a few" , truth be told , quite a bit more then a few because of decisions I've made. Society might call me a loser but when I look back, I do take pride what I have accomplished despite a world that is not built for us and throws roadblock after roadblock in our way.


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“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman


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31 May 2015, 9:36 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
...I do take pride what I have accomplished despite a world that is not built for us and throws roadblock after roadblock in our way.

^This
The pride comes from successfully navigating the challenges of autism, not from having it, for me, at least.



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31 May 2015, 9:49 pm

Yes, you do have a point.

By default we start at a disadvantage compared to N.T's.

However, we can feel better about ourselves knowing that others start disadvantaged as well.

Whether you grew up in poverty, a bad country of terrorists, with another mental disability or disability, or something that makes you a minority such as Homosexuality or being a targeted racial minority, etc. you can still find success.

We've got to look at it not by comparing ourselves just to the advantaged, but to our fellow disadvantaged as well.

Not everyone's lucky enough to be born in a rich, prosperous country or life.

If you've made it this far, it means you have survived. I'd be proud aswell.

It's not about looking at your life and seeing it as sh*t, it's about climbing out of the gutter and winning at life...



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31 May 2015, 9:49 pm

Yes, you do have a point.

By default we start at a disadvantage compared to N.T's.

However, we can feel better about ourselves knowing that others start disadvantaged as well.

Whether you grew up in poverty, a bad country of terrorists, with another mental disability or disability, or something that makes you a minority such as Homosexuality or being a targeted racial minority, etc. you can still find success.

We've got to look at it not by comparing ourselves just to the advantaged, but to our fellow disadvantaged as well.

Not everyone's lucky enough to be born in a rich, prosperous country or life.

If you've made it this far, it means you have survived. I'd be proud aswell.

It's not about looking at your life and seeing it as sh*t, it's about climbing out of the gutter and winning at life...



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01 Jun 2015, 10:53 am

Don't believe all the statistics you see. Only 60% of autistic people work, but only 60% of total PEOPLE work. And these are US/UK numbers, keep in mind. If you live somewhere else, there aren't any numbers for how many total people and how many autistic people work. How do I know? I'm currently researching this and I've been looking very, very hard.

My guess is that the other negative information out there for autistic people is about the same-misleading. Sure lots of stuff sucks, but it sucks for other people too. There's tons of stuff that doesn't suck, but it doesn't get the same press that negative things get.

Autistic people as a population have a lot of traits that are gifts and can make them superior to other people. Autistic people tend to have better focus, error finding abilities in visual searches, abstract spatial thought, parallel perception, and are more honest than other people. So if you want a "cure" for your autism, you'll have to give up your superior abilities as well.

If anyone wants to do some reading, PM me and I'll email you the studies I got this information from.



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01 Jun 2015, 10:58 am

I'm proud of the fact that I paid off the mortgage by the time I was 50. even though I could have just bought a house for cash had I not been been married for over a decade.



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01 Jun 2015, 7:26 pm

It bemuses me how people take pride in all sorts of things that are totally unrelated to personal achievement and choices. The flip side of this kind of pride is often shame.

I am guessing that if an NT posted "I am proud of being neurotypical" here there would be condemnation of that attitude, and this condemnation would be loudest, perhaps, and most vehement from those who assert "I am proud of being autistic".

Acceptance of who/what you are (whatever it is) is different from being proud of it; though perhaps the people who claim to be proud are trying to say that they are self-accepting and don't make any distinction between pride and acceptance (I am not sure).



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01 Jun 2015, 10:20 pm

darkphantomx1 wrote:
How can anyone be proud of being autistic? You've read the statistics. A good majority of us are unemployed, live on social security benefits, don't drive, have very few to no friends, in our 20s and never dated, don't drive, don't go to college. How can anyone be proud of that? Autism makes you unique? Unique don't mean s**t when you're depressed all the time because you have no friends and can't get a job because of your differences or when you're living on your own off of SSI or Medicaid and unemployed. A good majority of us are losers; we're misunderstood by neurotypicals, we're nerds, we have no friends, we work low pay minimum wage job, our only friends are our parents. Some of us don't even parents to help us anymore.

That's the sad truth for many of you. Half of your autistic brothers and sisters will live a life like this because of autism. Yes, even many of you with HFA will live like this. Because you were born different, because you were born with autism. You never could live up to your full potential.

So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.



I cannot say I am proud of it...its not an achievement of any kind, it also would not makes sense to me to be proud of my hair color, skin color or eye color ect. I accept that I am on the spectrum have autism and I work with that...works better than trying to fight it or simply act like its not a factor in my interactions and general behaviors. I am on SSI but not only because of the autism I also have had ongoing depression and anxiety since I was a kid and after an incident at my school when I was 16 or 17 I developed PTSD on top of that. I have been to college and it was more the PTSD that proved to ruin that for me if anything the aspergers sort of helps with the kind of analytical thinking to write essays and do in depth research while retaining all the most relevant information, but due to the PTSD being in a school environment even though it was college and not highschool was too much stress.

Autism makes me neurology unique compared to the majority since most people don't have autism...but I don't feel having autism alone gives me some kind of special unique personality. I think it would be more interests and how you express yourself, personality and what not that more determine that, there are plenty of autistic people that strive to be as 'normal' as possible by societies standards...there are some who don't, I'd be in the latter category. I cannot really say I don't have friends though I am kind of afraid to really truly bond with people as I've been stabbed in the back a few times but I have a few people that make a point to spend some amount of time with me and would certainly be friendly if I ran into them if I'm out and about. A lot of people I know would be considered 'losers' by certain people though many within the circle of people I know have jobs, and are doing their best to get by...a lot struggle with on and off homelessness but not out of laziness I guess I just don't really care. I mean sometimes people drive down the street and yell mean things out their car window when I'm with people :roll: though usually it comes out idiotic sounding on their part.

Are we kinda nerds certainly...I mean hell get me and my brother started on the game League of Legends or show Game of Thrones, or LOTR, and you should here him and our other friend/brother talk about Star Wars if you want to know everything about it just listen to them oh and their not autistic...and we all are quite smart our combined IQ might be over 9000 lol(oh that's a dragon ball z reference). I am not prideful of not having a job...though if I did have a job not sure I'd be entirely proud of it, it would likely be more means to an end, that being having money to live on.


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04 Jun 2015, 10:52 pm

BTDT wrote:
I'm proud of the fact that I paid off the mortgage by the time I was 50. even though I could have just bought a house for cash had I not been been married for over a decade.


I paid off my mortgage (funny word that, doesn't "mort" mean death? ex. mortuary, mortician) by the time I was 40. It takes discipline, of the kind that most NT's simply don't have, to do this, so there is one thing right there that is actually good about being a "loser".



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04 Jun 2015, 11:06 pm

darkphantomx1 wrote:
How can anyone be proud of being autistic? You've read the statistics. A good majority of us are unemployed, live on social security benefits, don't drive, have very few to no friends, in our 20s and never dated, don't drive, don't go to college. How can anyone be proud of that? Autism makes you unique? Unique don't mean s**t when you're depressed all the time because you have no friends and can't get a job because of your differences or when you're living on your own off of SSI or Medicaid and unemployed. A good majority of us are losers; we're misunderstood by neurotypicals, we're nerds, we have no friends, we work low pay minimum wage job, our only friends are our parents. Some of us don't even parents to help us anymore.

That's the sad truth for many of you. Half of your autistic brothers and sisters will live a life like this because of autism. Yes, even many of you with HFA will live like this. Because you were born different, because you were born with autism. You never could live up to your full potential.

So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.


Hmmm... let's see how much of this applies to me.
1) Unemployed - yes.
2) Live on social security benefits - yes, that too.
3) Don't drive - no, I actually do drive. Where did the myth that most of us don't drive come from, and why?
4) Have very few to no friends - yes, that's true in my case, but you know what? The main reason why this is the case is due to the fact that most of the people who feigned interest in developing a friendship quickly dropped the act when they found out I was a bit "strange" in their warped view. Who needs narrow-minded bigots for friends? I would rather be friendless.
5) In our 20's and never dated - well, I'm actually in my 40's and have never dated. So what? You can't miss something you have never known.
6) Don't go to college - no, I did go to college.

"Loser" score: 4 out of 6. Hey, I qualify as one! :mrgreen:

One other thing. Why do you think it is the case that we are so 'misunderstood by neurotypicals'? Whose fault is that do you think, in the vast majority of cases?



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05 Jun 2015, 12:15 am

darkphantomx1 wrote:
How can anyone be proud of being autistic? You've read the statistics. A good majority of us are unemployed, live on social security benefits, don't drive, have very few to no friends, in our 20s and never dated, don't drive, don't go to college. How can anyone be proud of that? Autism makes you unique? Unique don't mean s**t when you're depressed all the time because you have no friends and can't get a job because of your differences or when you're living on your own off of SSI or Medicaid and unemployed. A good majority of us are losers; we're misunderstood by neurotypicals, we're nerds, we have no friends, we work low pay minimum wage job, our only friends are our parents. Some of us don't even parents to help us anymore.

That's the sad truth for many of you. Half of your autistic brothers and sisters will live a life like this because of autism. Yes, even many of you with HFA will live like this. Because you were born different, because you were born with autism. You never could live up to your full potential.

So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.


You pretty much described my life in a nutshell. Unemployed, undereducated, never had a real relationship, painfully subsisting on welfare, depressed, almost no social life, unable to drive since I can't afford it, and am afraid that I would screw up really badly if I tried... yeah, I'm a f*****g loser, and the one gift I can offer to humanity, my tech skills, are something I have to go to school to prove my worthiness in.

I still have dreams however. I'd like to travel the world, try pufferfish, maaaaaybe go skydiving, take part in that yearly tomato fight they have in Spain, stuff like that. The only problem is that you need money for this kind of stuff, and I ain't got any. I can't stick out my thumb and hitch a ride on a 747. It seems that unless you're rich, or at least extremely NT and capable of charming people, you can't really do anything remarkable in life.

It's not wrong to be proud of being autistic, I just know that I'm not proud. Maybe I should take up writing music, Kurt Cobain and Richey Edwards were both extremely depressed individuals, and they were able to use this to write some of the greatest songs ever. Unfortunately, they both died at the age of 27...



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05 Jun 2015, 7:03 am

You choose self-loathing, that's fine, that's your decision. I don't judge you for it. I am proud of my achievements and of who I am, the struggles I've faced and overcome and the challenges yet to be conquered. I define my successes, choose how I learn from my failures, and I am the only one on this planet fit to judge me. I am not autism. I am not every autistic man, woman and child. I am no one else's successes, failures, abilities or disabilities nor do I represent them. I do not identify with autism, I happen to be autistic. It ends there. I also happen to be a lot of things, but I am not those things. They are experiences, conditions, ideas, and mere adjectives but they are not me. Autism doesn't make me unique. I make myself unique by working and striving to set myself apart not from other autistics, but other humans. I have suffered from severe depression, anxiety, PTSD, suicidal obsessiveness, and I do not let those factors defeat me or my Will. I and I alone determine what my full potential is, and then I choose to push myself farther.

Value is subjective. We choose the criteria and standards upon which we judge ourselves and our achievements, and we determine our full potential. No one other than myself is qualified to look at me and say "This is how far you will go, and this is how far you would have gone". Such nonsense implies a universal standard of human potential, which simply does not exist.

I choose not to self-loathe because of conditions with which I was born. Instead, I choose to succeed despite the way my brain is wired. While there are plenty of severely autistic people out there who are non-verbal, unable to work or care for themselves, does that mean they are to be marginalized? They didn't choose to be severely autistic. I am a Social Darwinist and even I think that is absurd. There are plenty of autistic savants with more merit than many NTs out there. While it's not autism, I have a friend who has cerebral palsy, is wheelchair-bound, muscle spasms, et alii, who is one of the most brilliant philosophical writers I have ever met and by his own merit earned the esteem of an ever growing population of readers. An autistic person who works and struggles to even learn to speak and succeeds holds more merit to me than a neurotypical who was born into wealth or makes his/her money by exploiting others. Your choice of self-shaming and self-loathing is yours and has nothing to do with anyone else here.