I'm more confident now, but it's still BS

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Aaendi
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13 Jun 2015, 11:43 am

I got my confidence by making new friends. I didn't get confident by acting like a douchebag, and I didn't make friends by acting like a douchebag either. I made friends by being honest about myself, (which includes telling them when I'm sad, or frustrated) and weeded out anyone judgmental people from my circle of friends. Acting like a douchebag only attracted douchebags.



Beau
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13 Jun 2015, 7:55 pm

Hey Aaendi.

Can you expand on why you believe it's still bs?



Aaendi
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14 Jun 2015, 1:11 am

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/M ... mworksFace

This is how "confident" people are supposed to look like, according to PUAs and other people who hype up the powers of being confidence. Attempt to hold that face for more than a couple minutes and you'll understand why it's BS. It's a strain on your facial muscles, and people don't magically like you being you use that stupid face. In other words it's not worth it, and I still managed to find friends without it, better actually.



Uprising
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14 Jun 2015, 5:40 am

Aaendi wrote:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DreamworksFace

This is how "confident" people are supposed to look like, according to PUAs and other people who hype up the powers of being confidence. Attempt to hold that face for more than a couple minutes and you'll understand why it's BS. It's a strain on your facial muscles, and people don't magically like you being you use that stupid face. In other words it's not worth it, and I still managed to find friends without it, better actually.


I always knew girls loved guys with epic trollfaces sneaking behind them in the dark, I mean it's so confident, so sexy, it's surreal.

Image

Image

Image

His teeth can perhaps go missing, but his pride and self-esteem are forever indestructible.



Aaendi
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14 Jun 2015, 10:25 am

I am not a troll.



WaveOfChange
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14 Jun 2015, 7:22 pm

He was referring to the images in the link you posted, not you. :)
Also, yeah. People don't like douchebags, it's just as a guy sometimes you can get so frustrated that douchebags attract other people with broken personalities. Which leads me to my current task, find someone who's not broken!



886
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15 Jun 2015, 6:10 am

If your standard for being a confident male is based off what you see in PUA articles, give up now. That's all hokey BS designed to manipulate and lie to women. Confidence is just being comfortable with yourself and the decisions you make, and not relying on others to do those things or validate your worth as a person. It's nothing more and nothing less, unless you want to dig deep into body language and other such things, then it's complicated. It's very basic, really.


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Who_Am_I
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15 Jun 2015, 4:48 pm

Aaendi wrote:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DreamworksFace

This is how "confident" people are supposed to look like, according to PUAs and other people who hype up the powers of being confidence. Attempt to hold that face for more than a couple minutes and you'll understand why it's BS. It's a strain on your facial muscles, and people don't magically like you being you use that stupid face. In other words it's not worth it, and I still managed to find friends without it, better actually.


picarddoublefacepalm.jpeg

Being confident is not about what expression you have on your face.


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jdibella
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30 Jun 2015, 9:38 pm

I'm not sure it's possible to be on the spectrum and feel confident. I think the key is to be okay with that and to except yourself as you are, which includes ur lack of confidence. Confidence = certainty. certainty is an illusion. If you can get comfortable with what ever lack of confidence u may have u will be happier. Most nt lack confidence too. They are better at concealing it.