People saying nice things, makes me sad?

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Yeah i had this experience here a while back. Ive tried searching on the web for more information.

I've experienced when people say geniuenly nice things about me, like you're a good person, have a good heart and stuff. For some reason it actually makes me really sad and can almost make me cry. Im really not sure why this is.

Maybe its because the truth hurts? or that i just dont believe these things myself?. Maybe i just have low self esteem combined with something?.

At anyrate, any ideas or other input is appreciated.

because it seems like a manipulative deception?

Because at the same time they act like you're air to them?

Although you believe they genuinely mean what they say and you yourself also do believe what they say is true, maybe you feel that that good quality of yours hasn't helped you have a happy life? So maybe it feels empty?

Or maybe you feel that's all you have?

Or even if what they say is true, the fact that they actively mention it to you makes you feel that they are trying to make you feel good about yourself? And that makes you feel pitied?

As I don't know you personally my suggestions are only wild guesses.

Sometimes, compliments make me feel a bit sad, too. Not little ones, like "I like your shirt" or "You look really pretty today", but heavy ones from the people really close to me, such as "I would die for you" and "You are a beautiful, priceless young lady".

I know with me, it's because the unconditional love they give me, for some reason, reminds me of all the mistakes I made that led towards me hurting them, and all the times I made them feel disappointed or dejected. I feel really bad with myself, and even though that's all behind us, it still makes me feel bad.

I kinda have the same thing or something that looks like it.

Whenever people give me compliments I never know what to say and just say thanks but still feel shy.

whenever people give me compliments it seems like they don't really mean it and they're just saying nice things out of pity.

I have trouble accepting compliments. There's a lot of schmooze around and I really don't think many compliments are sincere, though the motives behind them aren't always sinister, sometimes people play up your good side because they want to boost your confidence, and although that doesn't really work on a person who knows what they're doing, I suppose it's nice that they at least want to cheer me up, and if my mood isn't too bad, it can lift my spirits a little.

I also have to admit that I have rather a low opinion of myself and I'm sure that inhibits my acceptance of compliments too. I got a lot of criticism from my primary caregiver in my early years, and very little approval or praise, and I don't suppose I'll ever fully get over that.

But sometimes it's OK. It's good when somebody explains WHY they're impressed with my behaviour, if they explain it in logical way that can't really be refuted. So they might say something like "you were the only person there who bothered to notice and mention that fact, and it saved us all this trouble," and I can see that I really did do that, and that nobody else did, and that it did a lot of good. And sometimes the person who gives me the compliment is so socially inept or crusty that I can't believe they're capable of schmoozing, so I'm inclined to think they must have meant it. If somebody has shown that they're not afraid of criticising my behaviour, then their praise means something.

I get that way too sometimes. If someone makes a compliment and then say that they didn't know anyone else says that to me it makes me feel a little paranoid because it seems like they are just feeling sorry for me. It's almost like they are trying to communicate to me that I'm not liked by others and want to make sure I know it.

Also, when I was in high school some of my classmates would tell me that I did a good job even though I didn't do very well at all. It felt patronizing like they didn't think I could do any better or something. I think some of the people that did that were trying to belittle me, but I think some of them really did mean well. I doesn't bother me so much anymore if I know that they had good intentions behind it though.

Well, it would be either clumsy or downright malicious for somebody to say something nice about you and then say that everybody else felt differently. So if that's what you're getting, it would seem designed to make you feel paranoid, and to build you up and then smash you down. Correct me if I've misunderstood what you're saying.


That happens to me sometimes, and I'm never sure whether it's just a bit of well-intended crap or whether it's my perfectionism - 99 out of 100 is a great result for most people, but when I achieve that, I tend to focus on the 1 percent I got wrong.

It makes me uncomfortable, because I don't know how to respond, but not sad or happy.

My aunt used to say at bedtime something nice that would make a silent tear pop up.

I had a more intellectual(aspie) bond with my dad but from hindsight( even at 10 year-old) my mother was quite non-present, i dunno if that's me. As a teen I tried more bonding with her, but then was allowed to get wasted anyway. It's a strange situation, are you guilty of your first days, even ?