Open about your autism, and happy with the results?
Apart from Alex, I can't think of anyone on this site who is completely open about having autism. The overwhelming majority of members seem to find the best thing to do is to only tell if necessary, and have had bad experiences when telling people.
For me, I've had pretty much nothing but a positive experience from owning and declaring my AS. I guess you could call me "out and proud". Rather than hiding it or only mentioning it if asked, etc., I'll sometimes even let people know when there was no real reason to other than putting it out there. I see it as a sort of educational thing for others. People say not to tell because you will be misunderstood, due to people not knowing much about autism. Well I like to be one of the people who starts educating. People are free to observe me and see that I perhaps don't fit the stereotype they have in their head, and voila! Now they know a bit more about autism.
I realise that it's a risk, because rather than people learning, they might just judge me or treat me poorly. But I can't think of a time this has happened, and I wonder why, considering so many people say it's never a good idea to tell. Maybe it has something to do with the execution method?
Is there anyone else out there who is "out and proud" like me, and finds the experience positive? Does anyone else experience the freedom from it that I do - the inner contentment that comes from just being yourself and letting others know exactly who you are, no holds barred?
I'm newly diagnosed so I still working through this issue. So far I have only talked about my diagnosis with immediate family.
I've been blogging about my disclosure plans here: My Disclosure Planning . Yes blogging is a bit of a giveaway isn't it?
Next on my disclosure list is church. I really need some help there. If it gets negative then I'll up sticks and leave. If I stay quiet I will continue to bump along and struggle with the institution.
I don' think I have anything to be ashamed of. In fact the law says I should not be discriminated against and reasonable adjustments should be made. Indeed something like work or church should be concerned about us living to our full potential. Then we can bring our gifts to life and benefit everyone.
I expect to be out and proud. In time.
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Edgyspirit.com: blogging with the aim of making Church and Christianity more accessible to people on the Autism Spectrum .
I am not secretive, but there is no need for most people to know.
I have found that this method works best: if someone asks me directly or if the situation comes up, i'll admit to my AS, but i will not go out and volunteer the information to everyone.
This way, when i do come out, people will already know me and my quirks, at which point the reaction usually is along the lines of "well, that explains"
BirdInFlight
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It may be that of the people who are in your life, none of them could use the information against you in any negative way.
Other people's individual circumstances might be that someone somewhere in their life will not understand even IF you try to educate them, and the news will only give them ammunition to be or do something negative in your life.
I'm not going to go into details, but TRUST ME, I have people like this in my life, and if they knew, things would actually be worse for me -- yes even though I ought to be protected by laws about this.
I totally get where you're coming from about being part of the agent of change and education. But it's something either ALL of us need to do all at once in a critical mass, or something most of us cannot risk for one reason or another, otherwise individuals will still suffer for the disclosure.
Seriously, law doesn't protect everything, as people still find ways to get around it and even fire you while covering their tracks. Or treat you like sh!t while nothing they've said or done could stand up in a court of law.
I can't afford to make my status on this widely known, and I also don't want the exhaustion of having to then serve as a walking "education." I just want to live my life and keep my privacy.
It does frustrate me to have to hide stuff like this, but I feel like it's not right for me to be "out" as long as I'm self-diagnosed. That's part of why I'm pursuing an official diagnosis.
I am completely open about my autism, and happy with the results. I'm open in interviews, open with coworkers, open with students, open with people I know socially (online or in person). I don't actively tell people right away, but it always comes up, because really, special interest, it'll come up, whether or not I seek out telling someone about myself. Also, they ask about my sensory coping tools.
I've had negative reactions, but almost all negative reactions would have occurred whether or not I was open; they were negative based on my traits, not the word autism. I've had some extremely positive reactions, including some amazing interactions with students. It's always been worth the hard times, and I've gotten many more positive ones.
I'm not open about my diagnosis because I believe I'm more like an NT with Aspie traits than a real Aspie. I used to be open about it, but I find that people understand me better when they don't know about my diagnosis. The people that don't understand me misunderstand me whether they know my diagnosis or not.
It's nice that you want to educate people, I just don't think a lot of people are up to that. I do not want to be a poster child for anything. I just don't want the pressure to be a good representation or role model.
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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical
I'm not "out and proud", but I pretty much am myself - I just don't put a label on it. I think the label would do more harm than good in nearly every case. This is especially true since I don't have an official diagnosis, so people would be more inclined to argue with me about it. I just don't need that.
If anyone asked me "are you autistic/aspie?" I would probably say "yes" (depending on who and why), but no-one has ever asked that.
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I suppose you're asking only Americans and Europeans. The rest of the world aspies mostly live in fear of being found out, as you lose any credibility in Court, likely your driving licence as well, and of course forget about ever finding a job (especially in small countries like mine where word runs fast). The more you disclose your AS, the more lying and covering up you'll have to do later on to be able to continue living.
_________________
There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats - Albert Schweitzer
Last edited by Moondust on 30 Jun 2015, 12:41 am, edited 1 time in total.
Indeed. I'm not in the US either but I'm in a country that is comparatively very accepting of minority groups and such. I'm sure that is a huge factor in my positive experience with disclosure, but I thought there might be more people in a similar position to me. Good to see there are at least a few
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