Aspie guys what do girls do wrong?

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MjrMajorMajor
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05 Sep 2015, 5:47 am

cberg wrote:

I disagree with Oscar Wilde as well, that's a false bifurcation, love and understanding are inseparable. .



I think he was referring to love as romance, rather than any LTR. Romance has an element of mystery and drama because of the unknown. There is a saying that "familiarity breeds contempt". There is a kernel of truth to that statement.

If you've ever read Dorian Grey you see that he did have quite an understanding of society and human nature.



Booyakasha
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05 Sep 2015, 7:01 am

wilburforce wrote:
alex wrote:
Drawyer wrote:
Image

:D :D :D

I like this quote. :)


Why? It's twaddle. Oscar Wilde was gay, so are we really going to go to him for ideas on how women are in relationships and how to treat them? I'm beginning to rethink joining this forum--I don't know how much help I'm ever going to get associating with guys who think like this. I don't think this is the best place to look for help on how to improve my relationships with people, certainly not with women, if this is how you all think. What is with all the sexist men on here?--is that somehow associated with autism in males, and I'm some kind of statistical outlier for not believing these things about women and just trying to think about them like they are people just like me?


Actually Oscar Wilde knew enough about women to marry one, and have two sons with her. Google Constance Wilde.



kraftiekortie
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05 Sep 2015, 7:53 am

Interesting character, that Oscar Wilde.

It should be noted that in the Romantic Period (early 19th century), it was quite fashionable for "macho" dueling-type men like Lord Byron to effect feminine mannerisms and even feminine hairstyles and fashions at times.

And don't forget the time of Shakespeare--when men actually wore stockings!



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05 Sep 2015, 11:52 am

Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
alex wrote:
Drawyer wrote:
Image

:D :D :D

I like this quote. :)


Why? It's twaddle. Oscar Wilde was gay, so are we really going to go to him for ideas on how women are in relationships and how to treat them? I'm beginning to rethink joining this forum--I don't know how much help I'm ever going to get associating with guys who think like this. I don't think this is the best place to look for help on how to improve my relationships with people, certainly not with women, if this is how you all think. What is with all the sexist men on here?--is that somehow associated with autism in males, and I'm some kind of statistical outlier for not believing these things about women and just trying to think about them like they are people just like me?


Actually Oscar Wilde knew enough about women to marry one, and have two sons with her. Google Constance Wilde.

Yes, they are called beards. It's not proof that he understood or had real compassion for women--just ask any woman married to a closeted man who marries a woman and lies to her her whole life so he can keep his own lies in the closet with his shame. That is not what love and understanding looks like. Just because he could write compassionately doesn't mean he could live it.



Booyakasha
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05 Sep 2015, 12:53 pm

wilburforce wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
alex wrote:
Drawyer wrote:
Image

:D :D :D

I like this quote. :)


Why? It's twaddle. Oscar Wilde was gay, so are we really going to go to him for ideas on how women are in relationships and how to treat them? I'm beginning to rethink joining this forum--I don't know how much help I'm ever going to get associating with guys who think like this. I don't think this is the best place to look for help on how to improve my relationships with people, certainly not with women, if this is how you all think. What is with all the sexist men on here?--is that somehow associated with autism in males, and I'm some kind of statistical outlier for not believing these things about women and just trying to think about them like they are people just like me?


Actually Oscar Wilde knew enough about women to marry one, and have two sons with her. Google Constance Wilde.

Yes, they are called beards. It's not proof that he understood or had real compassion for women--just ask any woman married to a closeted man who marries a woman and lies to her her whole life so he can keep his own lies in the closet with his shame. That is not what love and understanding looks like. Just because he could write compassionately doesn't mean he could live it.


what you're saying still doesn't prove that he didn't get them. He was actually very skilled at reading people, so i don't think that the fact that he was gay or a beardo proves anything. I don't think that sexual orientation has anything to do with being able to understand opposite or same gender.



wilburforce
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05 Sep 2015, 1:02 pm

Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
alex wrote:
Drawyer wrote:
Image

:D :D :D

I like this quote. :)


Why? It's twaddle. Oscar Wilde was gay, so are we really going to go to him for ideas on how women are in relationships and how to treat them? I'm beginning to rethink joining this forum--I don't know how much help I'm ever going to get associating with guys who think like this. I don't think this is the best place to look for help on how to improve my relationships with people, certainly not with women, if this is how you all think. What is with all the sexist men on here?--is that somehow associated with autism in males, and I'm some kind of statistical outlier for not believing these things about women and just trying to think about them like they are people just like me?


Actually Oscar Wilde knew enough about women to marry one, and have two sons with her. Google Constance Wilde.

Yes, they are called beards. It's not proof that he understood or had real compassion for women--just ask any woman married to a closeted man who marries a woman and lies to her her whole life so he can keep his own lies in the closet with his shame. That is not what love and understanding looks like. Just because he could write compassionately doesn't mean he could live it.


what you're saying still doesn't prove that he didn't get them. He was actually very skilled at reading people, so i don't think that the fact that he was gay or a beardo proves anything. I don't think that sexual orientation has anything to do with being able to understand opposite or same gender.


Yes, and he also lived in a time and a culture when women still weren't considered people like men were. You can't understand and love people that you don't consider actual people, but something less than.



The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Sep 2015, 1:11 pm

This isn't a "What Oscar Wilde did wrong" thread.



Booyakasha
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05 Sep 2015, 1:18 pm

wilburforce wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
Booyakasha wrote:
wilburforce wrote:
alex wrote:
Drawyer wrote:
Image

:D :D :D

I like this quote. :)


Why? It's twaddle. Oscar Wilde was gay, so are we really going to go to him for ideas on how women are in relationships and how to treat them? I'm beginning to rethink joining this forum--I don't know how much help I'm ever going to get associating with guys who think like this. I don't think this is the best place to look for help on how to improve my relationships with people, certainly not with women, if this is how you all think. What is with all the sexist men on here?--is that somehow associated with autism in males, and I'm some kind of statistical outlier for not believing these things about women and just trying to think about them like they are people just like me?


Actually Oscar Wilde knew enough about women to marry one, and have two sons with her. Google Constance Wilde.

Yes, they are called beards. It's not proof that he understood or had real compassion for women--just ask any woman married to a closeted man who marries a woman and lies to her her whole life so he can keep his own lies in the closet with his shame. That is not what love and understanding looks like. Just because he could write compassionately doesn't mean he could live it.


what you're saying still doesn't prove that he didn't get them. He was actually very skilled at reading people, so i don't think that the fact that he was gay or a beardo proves anything. I don't think that sexual orientation has anything to do with being able to understand opposite or same gender.


Yes, and he also lived in a time and a culture when women still weren't considered people like men were. You can't understand and love people that you don't consider actual people, but something less than.


You don't have any proof that he thought of women as any lesser than men. The fact that he lived in a society that did, means nothing. He was able to think for himself, as his books prove.



Booyakasha
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05 Sep 2015, 1:20 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
This isn't a "What Oscar Wilde did wrong" thread.


oh but we're having so much fun :(

You usually even encourage that your threads become derailed, why is this one any different?



cberg
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05 Sep 2015, 1:36 pm

If we're only here to nitpick, I'd like the girls to make sure this t shirt never goes out of style.
Image


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rdos
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05 Sep 2015, 1:46 pm

The question is kind of imprecise, but since it is geared towards aspie guys, I'm going at assume it is geared at neurodiverse girls. It then becomes really easy to answer: They buy the views of society and culture too much, and go by their natural preferences too little.



SilverStar
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07 Sep 2015, 11:00 pm

Moccu wrote:
1-46, 10/10 truth.


It has a lot of generalizations and stereotypes about men and women, both, and I'm sure some of it doesn't apply to Aspies (shopping, sports, beer, etc.), but there some elements of truth in it.

I have personally experienced the following (with more than one woman, I might add):

2.
3.
4.
5. *
15. *
16.
19. *
27. *
29. *
32. *
35.
37.
42. *
43.
44. *

The ones I marked with an * are the ones that I find most frustrating, though most of these are communication differences.



cberg
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07 Sep 2015, 11:15 pm

I like technology/vehicle shopping, extreme sports and beer. If it weren't obvious enough I'm in the middle of this spectrum. I can see some things wrong about ALL those habits so I feel I'm imposing when I'm encouraged to seek out similar faults among girls. Constructive criticism may be occasionally useful but is it not absurdly dour?


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"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen: