its hard lifec with people doesnt understand you

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carcard
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13 Sep 2015, 11:02 am

all times qaustions as if you are stupid,.



EzraS
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13 Sep 2015, 8:11 pm

Yeah it is really difficult.
When people see me in real life they think I am intellectually disabled.
And even people I know that are intellectually disabled are far smarter than most around them realize.



auntblabby
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14 Sep 2015, 3:51 am

it took me all my life to realize that the most important thing, was that I myself understood me. everybody else can go suck an egg AFAIC. :razz:



iliketrees
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14 Sep 2015, 11:46 am

I can relate to this. Strangers sometimes talk to me as if I'm a toddler. I understand I probably look a bit young for my age, but there is no way I look more than 15 years younger than I am. And yet I get the baby-talk, the talking to my parents about me in front of me, very basic questions asked very slowly. But what you must remember is it's not your fault. They've made a wrong assumption. They assumed, because you're not like them, that you're not there at all. That is their ignorance, and does not make you stupid. It is frustrating. It doesn't matter what they think, it's not the truth and you know that. People who meet you may not understand, but there are members here who do and can relate to your experience.



SocOfAutism
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14 Sep 2015, 2:45 pm

I've had people assume that I'm stupid because I'm having neurological problems, but I've also had to dumb down the way I talk to people who don't get what I'm saying. Sometimes it's not polite to make the other person feel like you're smarter than they are, so you have to hide the fact that they don't understand you.

It's frustrating either way.



goldfish21
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14 Sep 2015, 9:38 pm

EzraS wrote:
Yeah it is really difficult.
When people see me in real life they think I am intellectually disabled.
And even people I know that are intellectually disabled are far smarter than most around them realize.


Yep - people tend to assume physical symptoms of disabilities = intellectually disabled as well.

I never had to deal with that myself.. more like the opposite frustration with people saying "you're SO smart, so why are you being such an idiot??" sort of things. Now that I've figured out how to treat my AS symptoms with great success, I don't tend to get those comments anymore. I still make the odd mistake, but by and large I'm doing pretty good.

Your post reminds me of back in high school when a friend/coworker or two assumed my high school best friend was intellectually disabled just because he's deaf/hard of hearing & his voice sounds different. Man-o-man did that ever irritate me that people could be so stupid. But rather than call them stupid, I educated them about the simple fact that he's merely deaf - not stupid. Doesn't matter what those people think, though.. he's doing fantastic and I'm SO proud of him. Married, two beautiful children, successful business that's growing exponentially right now.


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nick007
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15 Sep 2015, 12:34 am

People would understand you better if your English typing was better.


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Cockroach96
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15 Sep 2015, 12:29 pm

Being an aspie sucks, it sucks the marrow out of your life.


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auntblabby
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15 Sep 2015, 7:24 pm

I take my aspieness as a sort of penance or lesson I must learn in this lifetime.