How do you help yourself notice things we normally can't?

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From realising that a girl likes me initally, to knowing when and what a girlfriend could want, I've always had a lot of trouble picking up on subtle hints, which I'm sure I'm not alone in.

Does anyone have any tips on how to pick up things we're prone to missing due to being an Aspie?

Keeping in mind that the next relationship I enter (whenever that might be) will be the first I enter aware that I have aspergers.

I'm not sure how much help this will be, but you could read a couple books about body language...

Yeah I'd agree read as many books on body languaege as you can. Personally I find textbooks on body language the easiest to understand.

I would say good luck to you. I had many classes/trainings on body language/non-verbal and still see none of it. It actually seems to backfire when I think I do. I think the ability varies widely so you probably need to see where you fit.

The only thing that seemed to work for me was finding someone who recognized that I didn't pick up on any of it and who started to verbalize everything so I would know what was going on. I don't know how successful you'd be with women being like that. He was extremely rare among NT men. Most men thought I was naive, shy, "cute", babyish, but never figured out that I really couldn't get it. He seemed to be the only one.

I will say that intellectuals tend to deal with it more easily, maybe because they tend to analyze things more and they are more inclined to just accept that your brain is different without worrying about how that affects their own emotions. At least that's what I've found.

for me... it's a person by person experience.

everyone's diff and won't respond to or want the same things.

an intial raport helps... but in the end of all long term relationships... it boils down to patience anyway lol

I've always done a lot of people watching. Seems to have helped - though the majority of my empathy comes through my nose.

Hmmm, my problem would be that just watching someone and trying to guess is when I usually get it rather wrong.

I really need people to tell me things 'cause I'm just hopeless at figuring it out myself.

I always try to nurture communication in my relationsthips to this end, but it's not always successful, people like to not have to tell you everything unfortunately.

But I guess that's fair enough.

Still, doesn't help me much, lol.

You will never learn very well from just watching people, that is precisely the issue. If we could then we wouldn't be here talking about it.

I recommend you check out David de Angelos DVD series. There is absolutely nothing better that exists out there. He has a whole 6? I think it is DVD set on understanding body language in the context of dating.