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enz
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29 Sep 2015, 7:34 pm

Should I say I want to be friends first or should I keep it non verbal?

Cheers


*oops sorry should be in dating section*



Drawyer
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29 Sep 2015, 8:19 pm

You said if you *date* with a girl...

If she starts contacting with you knowing that she's "dating" with you, the least words she wants to hear from you is you want to be friends with her.

Even if she/or you pursue only friendship, I think it's better idea to keep "the words of friendship things" to yourself. Those term would easily be misunderstood by her assuming that you don't want her even as a friend. You'd better not say anything.

Friendship or partnership is not something that follows after someone's plan or determination. ...Being in undetermined relationship would lead to more friendly and easygoing date IMO.


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enz
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29 Sep 2015, 8:23 pm

I've got the flu and not thinking straight. I mean if I'm courting a girl and want to go slow how should I do that



Drawyer
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29 Sep 2015, 8:29 pm

In that situation, you should not say friendship or serious partnership things. It's better let the relationship flow as natural as possible with it undetermined for a while until she wants to hear from you about that matter, then you should say that you expect longterm relationship with her if you think that's possible.


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MissZahara
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30 Sep 2015, 9:44 am

enz wrote:
Should I say I want to be friends first or should I keep it non verbal?

Cheers


*oops sorry should be in dating section*


If you want to be friends-only, tell her so. If you'd like to date her, tell her so. Life's too short to play head games.



enz
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30 Sep 2015, 9:36 pm

my last relationship we did it on the first night. I want to try taking it slow for next time but ive never done that before. so if im interested i dont say I want to be friends first, what else?



whatamess
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01 Oct 2015, 12:44 am

IMO if you like the girl, don't tell her you want to be friends first or anything related to friends...just enjoy the time. If you mention the word friends and she actually likes you, she will think you don't really like her and possibly move on. Just keep it to yourself. Now if you truly ONLY want to be friends and nothing more EVER, then you can tell her.

PS if you really like her but want to take it slow, just let her know you like her but TAKE IT SLOW...don't make the moves lol but if SHE makes the moves, make sure you stop before it gets too crazy and let her know that you truly like her, but like her enough that you want to take it slow although your body might not want to... :-)



whatamess
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01 Oct 2015, 12:47 am

enz wrote:
my last relationship we did it on the first night. I want to try taking it slow for next time but ive never done that before. so if im interested i dont say I want to be friends first, what else?


I am always just shocked that anyone does it on the first night...wow...