Sorry if this is a double post. When I tried posting this, it sent me to a blank "Post A New Topic" page.
I have my GED, so I can't go back to high school. I just don't know if I made the right choice or not.
Here are the problems I faced in school.
My IEP was ignored:
One of the things on the IEP was for me to go into a quiet room when I'm upset. The teachers take me to the Special Ed classroom. They lie and tell me that it's going to be quiet in there. The students in there are loud, the TV is always on, and the teachers are talking. That isn't quiet. I don't think it's even quiet for neurotypical people.
They didn't understand that I can't learn by reading:
I struggle with comprehending words when I read them. That's why I almost always fail book assignments, and I struggled with math classes and tech classes. I love what they teach in tech classes, but I can never pass because we have to read the instructions from a book. I can read. I can make out the sounds of every word. I just struggle with comprehending even the simplest of phrases when reading. If you said, "The cat chased the mouse," I would understand what you meant. If I read "The cat chased the mouse," I wouldn't understand it. (This doesn't apply to writing. I know what the words I write mean.) I never understood why this happens.
The staff patronized me:
One thing that bothers me more than being treated like an idiot is when the people who treat you like an idiot say you're smart. Take my counselor, for example. She said I'm smart all the time, but she refused to put me in advanced classes. She thought that the advanced classes were going to be more stressful even though it's not the work that irritates me. It's the students who don't take the work seriously and ruin it for those of us who do. People in advanced classes aren't people who couldn't care less about school and wanted to talk to their friends rather than pay attention to the teacher. In fact, my teachers thought it was a good idea to give me even easier work. I grew resentful to being called smart because of that. I was the smart guy. That was the only good thing people saw in me. I was treated like an idiot, so I was clearly good for nothing. They thought I was the stereotypical autistic person who couldn't read people nor realize when they're treated like an idiot.
I was mistreated by the teachers:
It's bad enough when you're bullied by other students. It's even worse when the teachers are the bullies. Not only did they think I was stupid, they treated me horribly, too. I was picked on, teachers ignored me, I was "forgotten" in a lot of role calls, I got in trouble for things that weren't my fault, and my teachers never cared about my well being. As a nerd, it was expected for me to get bullied. I was the last person to be picked in PE and for groups, excluded from most things, and shunned. During high school, I kept to myself because I knew everyone hated me. I wanted friends, but no one was willing to see me as a good person. I tried talking to people, but my social skills sucked. (They still suck.) So I was bullied, just as expected. I have claustrophobia, and the school knew it. They locked me in a small room. Then they suspended me because I screamed. No one would feel comfortable being locked in a small room. Having Asperger's and claustrophobia just made it worse.
Those are the four main reasons I dropped out. There were a lot of other things at my school that were bad. (intelligence was looked down on, art class didn't allow creativity, everyone was punished when one person did something wrong, etc.)
Did I make a terrible decision by dropping out, or was it reasonable for me? I know dropping out is a bad thing, but is it so bad that it was better for me to stay in school? Maybe this is how school usually is, and I just felt threatened like I usually do. I really don't know.
30 Oct 2015, 9:50 am
