Page 1 of 2 [ 28 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

Torstin
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 15 Dec 2015
Age: 34
Posts: 58

19 Dec 2015, 11:26 pm

So, I still have to fight it, but I'm a lot better at controlling my anger nowadays... or so I think as I haven't been put to the test in this situation in a long time.

What I am referring to is, for instance, I have a washcloth that has a certain place I put it when not in use. One day a roommate knocked it on the ground and it was covered in grass. They left it on the ground. I'm pretty sure one of them used my washcloth as they work in landscaping. I couldn't just ring it out as it reeked of grass.

I was instantly infuriated, and it got worse, as I asked everyone suspected and of course they all denied it. I was yelling and I felt like hitting something or throwing things. Just thinking about it to this day tees me off. I absolutely despise it when people deny their responsibility in wrongdoing. I don't understand why they can't just take responsibility and do the right thing. I would even go so far as to say that I hate people for that.

If something unexpected like that happens to you, do you react similarly? Someone moving your possessions without saying anything, or using them without asking, is what I mean.



slw1990
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Jan 2014
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,406

19 Dec 2015, 11:54 pm

I guess it kind of depends on why they moved it and if they do it to other people or not. I'm usually not very happy about it when it seems like they intentionally do it to target me. I usually don't say anything though because I'm not really sure what to say or how to respond to what they will say or do next once I would confront them. Then I start to feel more frustrated because I didn't stand up for myself like I should.



cathylynn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Aug 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,045
Location: northeast US

20 Dec 2015, 12:10 am

i find it annoying rather than rage-inducing.



Earthling
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2015
Posts: 3,450

20 Dec 2015, 12:54 am

Very very very annoying. I like to find my things where I put them, how I put them.



zkydz
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Nov 2015
Age: 63
Posts: 3,215
Location: USA

20 Dec 2015, 1:24 am

Earthling wrote:
Very very very annoying. I like to find my things where I put them, how I put them.

Perfect reply. Can't add a thing to it for myself.

I have had near meltdowns though when I can't find something that I need (Gotta keep that flow going on the work!!) because it's not in where I put it.


_________________
Diagnosed April 14, 2016
ASD Level 1 without intellectual impairments.

RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8


League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,205
Location: Pacific Northwest

20 Dec 2015, 1:56 am

For me it actually depends on my mood. If I am already overwhelmed and stressed out or having a bad day or been dealing with other things that have taken up my energy like dealing with the chaos in my home; hyperactive son and crying baby, and then I see something of mine has been moved, it really does tick me off. For days my stuff kept being moved because I have young children you know so the TV remote kept being removed from my room and just a few days ago I felt I was going to explode one of these days because I felt the glass was getting full and dealing with my stuff being moved around was getting too much for me to handle which is why I have the strict rule to not touch my things and none of my kids are allowed in my room while I am gone because then my son leaves the door open and my daughter gets in there. It's like being in my childhood again where my brothers would touch my things and mess up my stuff including my playhouse and oh boy would I be crying and screaming and not be able to calm down until it's fixed. I never got violent, it was only yelling and screaming and of course if it got too much, I did my revenge by trying to get my brothers into trouble by doing things and then going to Mom and telling her they did it. :twisted: Then that stopped when they stopping going in my room because they were a little older and my brother understood how much it upset me so he stayed out of my room and kept our brother out too and their friends. They also learned to not mess my stuff up so it was like I had broken them.

My guess is the reason why people deny it is because they don't want to deal with you yelling at them and screaming at them and seeing you have your episode so it's easier for them to deny it. I can remember my brother and their friends going through some silly phase where they would take all the clothes off my Barbies and hang them out the window in my dollhouse. They were in 4th grade. For some reason that didn't upset me just because they took my dolls out and put them there. But they denied it. I don't think they wanted me to scream at them and them go crying to our mother about them touching my property and then I am hard to calm down and I am yelling at everyone like a crazy lady.


_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed.

Daughter: NT, no diagnoses.


0regonGuy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Apr 2015
Posts: 658
Location: Oregon Coast

20 Dec 2015, 6:06 am

Torstin wrote:
So, I still have to fight it, but I'm a lot better at controlling my anger nowadays... or so I think as I haven't been put to the test in this situation in a long time.

What I am referring to is, for instance, I have a washcloth that has a certain place I put it when not in use. One day a roommate knocked it on the ground and it was covered in grass. They left it on the ground. I'm pretty sure one of them used my washcloth as they work in landscaping. I couldn't just ring it out as it reeked of grass.

I was instantly infuriated, and it got worse, as I asked everyone suspected and of course they all denied it. I was yelling and I felt like hitting something or throwing things. Just thinking about it to this day tees me off. I absolutely despise it when people deny their responsibility in wrongdoing. I don't understand why they can't just take responsibility and do the right thing. I would even go so far as to say that I hate people for that.

If something unexpected like that happens to you, do you react similarly? Someone moving your possessions without saying anything, or using them without asking, is what I mean.


If you don't want people touching your stuff, then keep it in your private space. If you leave it it a common area, then it's going to get touched. Sorry, but deal with it.


_________________
Autism Social Forum
A place for autistic people to discuss their interests.


zkydz
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Nov 2015
Age: 63
Posts: 3,215
Location: USA

20 Dec 2015, 6:45 am

0regonGuy wrote:
If you don't want people touching your stuff, then keep it in your private space. If you leave it it a common area, then it's going to get touched. Sorry, but deal with it.

Not always the case. For instance, there is no 'private space' when you're married and living in a small place. So, yeah, not always applicable.


_________________
Diagnosed April 14, 2016
ASD Level 1 without intellectual impairments.

RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8


captain mills
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 19 Oct 2015
Posts: 55

20 Dec 2015, 7:18 am

I understand - I find it really infuriating. I'm the kind of person who will bottle my anger though, so I don't tend to have a go at the person I'm actually angry at. In fact, a lot of the time I don't even recognise it's anger that I'm feeling and then I'm like "ARGH why do I feel so awful?!"


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 121 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 104 of 200
Alexithymia: You show high alexithymic traits.
Female, twenties, UK, recently diagnosed Aspie


whatamess
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 56
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,284

20 Dec 2015, 10:54 am

Yup, it gets on my nerves. I too think people who don't take responsibility for the things they do are a#$%les and not to be trusted at all.



skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,295
Location: my own little world

20 Dec 2015, 11:19 am

That would infuriate me. I don't like that at all. Now if they had to use it and they really did not have a choice, I am ok with that. But I expect them to tell me afterwards. Like if you used my washcloth you'd better tell me. And if you knock it in the dirt and leave it there, we are going to have a fight. But if you tell me, wash it and then replace it to it's place all clean or if you give me another clean one, I am ok with that. But you have to tell me what happened. If I just come home and find my washcloth on the ground and I know there is no way it could have gotten there on it's own, I will have a huge problem with that.


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


DevilKisses
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jul 2010
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,067
Location: Canada

20 Dec 2015, 11:22 am

I really hate it. When no one is around I will scream and swear about it.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical


skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,295
Location: my own little world

20 Dec 2015, 11:28 am

DevilKisses wrote:
I really hate it. When no one is around I will scream and swear about it.
Me too. Sometimes I might even scream in front of them.


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


Pieplup
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Dec 2015
Age: 20
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 2,658
Location: Maine

20 Dec 2015, 11:32 am

I find very annoying especially when I can't find it. Image :pale: :mad:


_________________
ever changing evolving and growing
I am pieplup i have level 3 autism and a number of severe mental illnesses. I am rarely active on here anymore.
I run a discord for moderate-severely autistic people if anyone would like to join. You can also contact me on discord @Pieplup or by email at [email protected]


FutureVet
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 25 Sep 2015
Posts: 36

20 Dec 2015, 3:29 pm

I have a really hard time with this.

I don't put things away so much as I just leave them places in the house. If someone comes through and moves them and I can't find them it makes me really upset. And of course the other person is then mad at me because it's my fault I never put anything away.

I've tried cleaning up and putting things in a certain place and it never works, I can never remember where the new spot is.


_________________
RAADS-R: 192
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 135 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 49 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
AQ: 44

Let me explain: I am not diagnosed nor am I "self-diagnosed," all I know are what my life experiences have been up to this point and a lot of it makes more sense when considered through the lens of autism and sensory processing issues.


Britte
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,136
Location: @

02 Apr 2016, 5:20 pm

A few days, ago, my home and my neighbor's home were broken into while we were at work. Our things were gone through and tossed about. I have always been affected to a degree, when my possessions have been moved, and this was the epitome of that, magnified X billions.