Just diagnosed. Feeling worried about life.

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Hi everyone

Sorry I forgot about this thread so didn't check for responses. To answer your questions, Christmas was awful. I was totally overwhelmed by the amount of social expectations and I ended up totally breaking down and having to leave on Boxing Day. It was horrible and it caused a big problem with me any my boyfriend. He has never seen me like that and it was hard for him to understand why an adult would behave like that.

In general I'm feeling much better now. I'm considering changing my work so I don't work with families any more. I feel I have too many demands coming from too many people and I can't manage all of them so end up letting people down. I am happiest when I am doing computer programming but don't want that to be my career. Once I finish my Masters I'm thinking of trying to PhD funding as I would like to do some research in autism, and I think a more academic focus would work better for me.

I'm still worried about my relationship as I feel like I don't show him enough attention or show him I love him enough or the correct way. I suppose I just have to assume he believes me when I tell him I love him.