Aspie Females: If you're considering dating a NT...

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DONT. That is all.

One person's experience is one person's experience. There are other women on here who have NT partners and things are OK.

In my personal experience, it all depends on the individual.

I've dated plenty of NTs. It has been fine.

I've been married over 20 years, and I'm pretty sure my husband is NT.

I once had a crush on a librarian in Northern Maine. She was NT.

Tbh ND dudes are just as obnoxious as NT ones. If I'm gonna date someone I'm much more worried about liking them as a person, not whether or not they at also ND.

I'm guessing this is a vent.

Neurotypical doesn't really exist in any absolute sense. Yes there are more typical behaviour and traits, but this is more of relative concept especially in respect to the trait of a single spectrum.

Both Neurotypical and Neurodiverse are concepts that are not mutually exclusive.

I stand by this, the clue is in the name Neurodiverse.

I've had 2 long term relationships with NT guys and I can tell you that it takes quite an extraordinary NT man (or woman) to navigate a relationship with you.

I think it works with my current partner when I explain to him how my brain works and why I do certain things.

It will be frustrating that he doesn't just know what seems so logical to you or that he doesn't realize that when you say something is important, it really is very important (like preferences for touching, socializing, eating). All I can say is, explain it. I had to be told over and over that I wasn't sharing enough because apparently NTs volunteer information about themselves without being asked on a regular basis. Turns out everything I thought was obvious to him, is not. I can't tell you how many times I've heard, "I can't read your mind" or "why didn't you tell me".

Don't date an NT (or anyone) who resents you for anything, who thinks it's your "fault", or that you should change.

The black and white thinking is also tough. It can be very hard to not know exactly how much the other person cares about you, where you are on the dating scale of seriousness, or where it's going.

My partner said if he didn't want to be with me, Aspergers would never be the reason why. If he thought I was just too hard or too much work, then I wouldn't want to date him anyway. So ideally, date someone who sees you, not you plus your Aspie traits.

This may be controversial, but consider not clearly disclosing it. By all means, don't suppress who you are, but just see how they feel about you without the bias that might form after you label your personality. If you don't like touching, say so, if you only like certain foods, say so, if you struggle with black and white thinking, say so. It is no different than them sharing their likes, dislikes, strengths, and weaknesses. Yours are just more uncommon.

Last tip, try not to make assumptions. For example, don't dismiss someone because they think it's weird you don't have friends. They probably won't understand until you explain to them that you just don't have the same need for them as other people do and this doesn't mean you don't like people or don't want friends. You might just find the whole process too taxing so you don't have any...yet.