Girls with Asperger's are reading mental scripts always?

Post Reply New Topic

What does this mean? I read this: do most Aspergirls rehearse everything they were going to say ever in advance? Most of what I say I say off the top of my head, not by my own will... I often rehearse conversations to myself, on a daily basis, yet I do not see the fruit of my efforts due to other people having other ideas of what to talk about...

I have quoted stuff from TV when I was younger. How much? I don't know. I don't remember.

Anyways, do Aspergirls mostly script everything they say? How do they do this? Do they prepare for the situations most likely to occur, and how do they know how to do so?

I don't do this all the time, but sometimes I do plan out what I'm going to say before I say it.

Huh? where did you read that? I certainly don't rehearse everything I say in advance, how am I supposed to know what conversations/topics and such will come up to begin with? I might think about something I want to say to someone or talk about with them before I bring it up......but never go as far as rehearsing that sounds like a lot of extra effort for interaction.

But yeah I don't really know what would be meant by that, doesn't seem accurate though.

I take my time when responding to people, but it's not scripting, it's just slow thinking. However when I was a child I would come up with preplanned conversation points and starters. Never really worked all that well though. As I got older I learned how to deal with spontaneity better.

I will rehearse in my mind potential conversations I might have so that I am prepared beforehand and will have a good response. Some things are memorized, but those are short things, such as greetings, how to end phone calls, how to leave messages on a voicemail, etc.

I do this. Like, incessantly. I spend more time having hypothetical conversations than I do speaking to actual people.

I think the same is true for me.

I'm a man.

I find this subject to be quite relevant as it pertains to autism and to how one gains skills in socialization within one's autism.

I used to rehearse, out loud, conversations I would hear in supermarkets. I would also listen to adult conversations (never kid's conversations, for some reason).

I would do this when I had nobody to talk to immediately. Or I might do it when, say, I wanted to talk to a girl.

I am the opposite. I respond off-the-cuff (which isn't necessarily advisable).

There are times when I could be successful just "winging it"--doing it off the cuff.

Many times, though, I become flustered, and I stutter. There are many times when I can't convey my thoughts well at all.

I don't really "rehearse" any longer. However, I believe there are times when "rehearsing" might be to my benefit.

kk, I do it impulsively. I wish I did not. I, too, can become flustered. I only seem to stutter when I am overly tired and/or anxious. I only meant that I answer with the first thing that comes to my mind, genuinely/authentically. But, I do not necessarily advise responding in this manner_

I actually do both. I am quite impulsive, and always say the wrong thing. This is why I feel the need to rehearse conversations beforehand.

I only do it when I know I'll be in a situation where it would be very easy to say the wrong thing and embarrass myself, or when I know I need to keep certain things to myself. Then I will rehearse in my head what to say if someone asks a personal question that I'd rather not answer.

It helps me to be somewhat more prepared in socially exhausting situations.

The only reason why I do okay with "small talk" is because there's a sort of script to it, which I've learned over the years.

Additionally, I have grown to understand why people, sometimes, don't want to say how they are really feeling when asked "How are you doing?" Sometimes, I might be quite sad about something--yet I don't want anybody else to know what I'm feeling.

I feel there's a reason for the "script," while it is, technically and precisely, somewhat phony.

I often rehearse what I will say on the phone before making a phone call. The phone makes me more nervous than talking in person. I appreciate it when I get coached (usually by my husband) through a phone call I have to make to a different kind of company than I have ever called before. For example, I recently had to call a car insurance company because I had been involved in a car accident. My husband let me know what they were going to ask for and what information I needed to have on hand before calling. This was extremely helpful to me.

When I was in high school, I spent a *tremendous* amount of time rehearsing conversations before having them. I treated it like a "choose your own adventure novel", where I would come up with different responses depending on what the other person might say. This proved very helpful to me.

I have rehearsed (internally, not out loud) ordering at a restaurant. It is almost 2nd nature now.

Sometimes I rehearse saying people's names out loud. It doesn't always work. I still freeze. I often think about how I am going to greet someone or what I *want* to say, but often this plan gets derailed because the other person starts talking before I do and the conversation goes down a different trail than I could predict.

My Aspie husband does this too.

Before he was diagnosed, he told me about all the work he has to do in his head just to speak to people. I had never heard anything like that before. He asked me what I do when I have a conversation, and I told him I just talk.

The only time I might think in advance is for a job interview.

What was more interesting, is my husband thought everyone did this massive preplanning just like him. He can't imagine just talking without figuring out how and what to say in advance. My husband calls that his script.

My husband drew out what he meant by his scripts. It is mostly for small talk situations with strangers.

It reminded me of the number factor trees you did in school.

Someone says, "Hello, have you been waiting long?"

That breaks down to choices a or b response.

If the stranger say this...you can pick from c or d.

Basically, it is what a child would learn in a social skills class.

Have you waited in line long? That could be the person inquiring about a statement of fact (length of time) OR they found you interesting and want to chat while waiting OR they want information (length of time) and have a chat.

The suck part is body language, facial expressions and tone of voice sort of dictate whether it is 1, 2 or 3. My husband is horrible at judging any of those instantly. So his scripts are the polite middle of the road.

When he is with strangers, his anxiety sky rockets. The ability to read people plummets, and that is why he thinks the scripts help him.

My husband says be barely does it anymore for family or folks he has known for a long time.