Page 1 of 1 [ 10 posts ] 

DevilKisses
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jul 2010
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,083
Location: Canada

09 Feb 2016, 12:50 pm

I'm taking a DNA test to see what genetic weaknesses I have. I basically have to take 23andme to get the raw data and input that raw data into a program that will process it. I don't know what the program is, but my doctor does know. It's pretty simple to me.

I've tried explaining this to my mom several times, but she won't get it. I already ordered the kit and sent it back to the lab. I normally wouldn't get annoyed at her getting confused, but she's getting very annoying about it. She keeps asking if I've done the other test or all of the steps.

It's really pissing me off because I've done all the steps I need to do. She's also worried that we'll lose money if they fail to analyze my DNA. We won't actually lose money. They'll send us another kit for free. :wall: :wall:

At least I've ruled out one job. I wasn't thinking of being a teacher or professor to begin with, but I now know it's a terrible idea. I believe teachers should be able to explain as many ways as possible and be patient with people who aren't getting something. I'm definitely not patient enough with my mom.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical


Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 40,605
Location: Stendec

09 Feb 2016, 1:26 pm

Who are you doing this for: your mother or yourself?


_________________
 
“I must acknowledge, once and for all, that the
purpose of diplomacy is to prolong a crisis.”

— Leonard Nimoy as Mr. Spock, in the Star Trek
episode "The Mark of Gideon" (ep. 3-16, 1969)


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 64,135
Location: Queens, NYC

09 Feb 2016, 2:26 pm

I hope, if you find out that you have Jewish ancestry, that you don't consider this a "genetic weakness."

If you happen to find that you have a considerable amount of "Amerind"/First Nations/Native American ancestry, I hope you don't consider that a "genetic weakness," either.

It's all very subjective, anyway. What's "weakness" to one person could be "strength" to another.

Just tell your mother you're trying to get to the heart of your origins. You're overage. You're paying for it. There's nothing illegal, or even morally wrong, about what you're doing.

The problem lies, perhaps, in its accuracy.



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 21,764
Location: temperate zone

09 Feb 2016, 3:34 pm

Why ARE you doing it?

I gather that its because youre curious about both your possible health issues, and you're curious about your ethnic ancestry. Both of those are common reasons folks take those kind of tests. So just say youre doing it for those two reasons. Period. Don't see why that wouldnt make sense to your mom.

And you dont hafta go into that thorny stuff about how your "obsessed with Judaism, and obsessed with being obsessed with Judaism, and obsessed with being with being obsessed...etc...".If THATs the problem. Just keep it brief.



BirdInFlight
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jun 2013
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,590
Location: If not here, then where?

09 Feb 2016, 7:55 pm

I agree with the last post -- you have two reasons why you're curious, they're the same reasons everyone else does this test. That's all. It's simple. You're not alone in having these two curiosities: health stuff, and ethnic heritage stuff.

Both of those are things almost everyone would like to know more about themselves, and for obvious reasons. The health stuff could be anything from merely fun to know (someone predisposed to be addicted to coffee) to life-or-death important to know (inheritable conditions or genes marked with proneness to one).

And for ethnic heritage -- genealogy is an ever-expanding obsession with millions of people. Ancestry.com is busting at the seams. People have always been interested in how far back they can trace their roots and if there's anything interesting back there, like other cultures, countries or races. It's very human to be interested in all this.

Just tell your mom there's nothing to explain or be confused about -- you're interested in you family genetic ethnic origins like millions of people are, and you're interested in knowing more about your health and any things you should know about it.

Personally I'm excited for your test and can't wait to hear what you tell us about the results. I love this stuff. I'd like to do this test too.


_________________
~ ~ ~

If you have a problem with something I post, something I believe, something I do or say, something in my sig, or something I am stupid enough to share that I'm struggling with and being caused pain by -- TELL ME TO MY FACE so that I can defend myself, instead of see you make a mockery of or a dig about it later.

On the other hand, friends will never need an explanation, and enemies bent on disliking me will never accept one.

ASD Level 1, PTSD. Plus anxiety with panic attacks, mild sub-clinical situational depression -- and a massive case of sheer freakin' BURNOUT.

~ ~ ~


GodzillaWoman
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2014
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 728
Location: MD, USA

09 Feb 2016, 9:33 pm

sounds like fun. What exactly does she not understand? How the test works, or what happens if the genetic sample is lost or damaged? If she's worried it's lost or damaged, you could always contact the lab. The kit it self sounds inexpensive--it's the analysis that takes a long time.

DNA analysis does take a long time, especially if they have a big workload. I studied genetics in college, and a DNA test is nowhere NEAR as fast as they show in the cop shows. The speed of the test also depends on how thorough the sequencing is, too--basically, if they are checking the entire DNA or spot-checking the locations of common disease genes.

My cousin only had the ethnicity test done, which just tests the Y-chromosome and mitochondrial DNA. It's pretty cool (forgive the geek out)--they can tell migration patterns of ethnic groups based on variations in the genes caused by mutation, and how many generations ago they separated, based on mutation rate. Mutations occur at a pretty steady rate, so they can tell when two groups separated (e.g., when people first left Africa, or when Europeans left the Middle East). They've tested thousands of people around the world, and found that certain versions of genes are more common in certain ethnic groups and even in certain regions (e.g., Northeastern Europe).

Can you ask for certain conditions to be checked, based on family history? I noted that you can participate in studies, too. Are they sequencing the entire DNA, or just spot-checking it for common diseases?

If you want to get into the ethnic migration thing, here's a good intro.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haplogroup


_________________
Diagnosed Bipolar II in 2012, Autism spectrum disorder (moderate) & ADHD in 2015.


Cyllya1
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 26 Apr 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 320
Location: Arizona, USA

09 Feb 2016, 10:10 pm

What sort of thing are you trying to explain? (The replies so far seem incongruous with your post. There's clearly some backstory here, but I'm just going to take the OP on its own.)

It sounds like your mom is confused by the 23andMe process, and she thinks you're doing it incorrectly by omitting some steps? (Not sure if she thinks you don't understand the steps as well as she does, or if she just doesn't realize you have done all the steps and is worried you are going to forget about a step you haven't done yet.)

Well, the service probably provides some kind of handy "this is what you have to do" documentation. Assuming you don't think it's beyond your mom's ability to understand, try printing it out and putting a big check mark next to all the parts you've already done.

Judging by the commercials I've seen for 23andMe, they sound like they try to be layman-friendly. If the company can't explain it to her, you probably can't. So if she just won't get it, you might try the ol' broken-record technique. You can Google "broken record technique assertiveness" for details on what that means, but the idea is that you don't try to explain in depth and instead give the same short polite response every time she pesters you. It doesn't have to be word-for-word identical, just the same idea, and don't waste your energy on an explanation she won't accept.

Bonus points if you make it sound like you're agreeing with her. (Well, that sounds kind of stupid, but I mean, if there is some part of her nagging that you do agree with, focus on that. For example, if her motive for this behavior is that she wants you to have the DNA analysis done correctly, that makes sense, right?) If you sound argumentative, she'll probably feel compelled to justify her behavior and hearing her explanation will just annoy you more, and it creates hard feelings all around.

Example conversation:
Her: "Did you do [insert test] yet? You don't want to forget it."
You: "Yeah, thanks, I took care of all the tests. Now we're waiting for them to send the results back."
Her: "What about [insert some totally irrelevant test you didn't even need to do]?"
You: "Yep, I don't need to do anything else with it until they send the results back."
Her: "Just be careful you don't leave anything out, because I bet if you mess it up, they charge you for the whole thing again and blah blah blah..."
You: "Yeah, the next step is for them to send the results back."

You might have to make adjustments to this depending on exactly what her problem is.

Disclaimer: I know pretty much nothing about the 23andMe process. Just what's on the commercials.


_________________
I have a blog - Here's the post on social skills.


C2V
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Apr 2015
Posts: 2,666

09 Feb 2016, 11:05 pm

Are you as obsessed about this in real life as you are on here? Because there have been a few threads now coming at this one subject from different angles. If so and it's something you talk about all the time, maybe she is just trying to engage with you on a subject you're interested in, and trying to be involved, but doesn't really know what to say? I'm sympathetic to being obsessive, but sometimes we can't see the lines of where our families may be getting tired of it when we're still enthusiastic. Unfortunately, that can sour people on the subject, which may account for the somewhat negative comment that you're going to lose money if it is done incorrectly. It might be insightful to observe if she is the one coming at you with these concerns all the time and bugging you about it, or she is responding to your interest a bit negatively.

Quote:
My cousin only had the ethnicity test done, which just tests the Y-chromosome and mitochondrial DNA. It's pretty cool (forgive the geek out)--they can tell migration patterns of ethnic groups based on variations in the genes caused by mutation, and how many generations ago they separated, based on mutation rate. Mutations occur at a pretty steady rate, so they can tell when two groups separated (e.g., when people first left Africa, or when Europeans left the Middle East). They've tested thousands of people around the world, and found that certain versions of genes are more common in certain ethnic groups and even in certain regions (e.g., Northeastern Europe).

That is cool though. 8)


_________________
Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.


DevilKisses
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jul 2010
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,083
Location: Canada

10 Feb 2016, 1:54 am

C2V wrote:
Are you as obsessed about this in real life as you are on here? Because there have been a few threads now coming at this one subject from different angles. If so and it's something you talk about all the time, maybe she is just trying to engage with you on a subject you're interested in, and trying to be involved, but doesn't really know what to say? I'm sympathetic to being obsessive, but sometimes we can't see the lines of where our families may be getting tired of it when we're still enthusiastic. Unfortunately, that can sour people on the subject, which may account for the somewhat negative comment that you're going to lose money if it is done incorrectly. It might be insightful to observe if she is the one coming at you with these concerns all the time and bugging you about it, or she is responding to your interest a bit negatively.
Quote:
My cousin only had the ethnicity test done, which just tests the Y-chromosome and mitochondrial DNA. It's pretty cool (forgive the geek out)--they can tell migration patterns of ethnic groups based on variations in the genes caused by mutation, and how many generations ago they separated, based on mutation rate. Mutations occur at a pretty steady rate, so they can tell when two groups separated (e.g., when people first left Africa, or when Europeans left the Middle East). They've tested thousands of people around the world, and found that certain versions of genes are more common in certain ethnic groups and even in certain regions (e.g., Northeastern Europe).

That is cool though. 8)

I rarely talk about it in real life. I use WP as an outlet for my obsessions.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical


C2V
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Apr 2015
Posts: 2,666

10 Feb 2016, 6:47 am

Quote:
I rarely talk about it in real life. I use WP as an outlet for my obsessions

That's understandable. But there goes my theory about your mum. :wink:


_________________
Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.