Advice on dealing with grilfriend and her Bipolar?

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Ok so I went through hell and back, and had a major breakdown. But I am back and need your advice guys as I saw that many of you are experienced with Bipolar. I searched all forum but did not find what I was looking for.

I have been with a girl for 4 of 5 years and we have two boys. Things were always okay, although over the last two years or so there was increasingly more drama at home. Last year we split up as she was depressed, numb or psychotic and emotional and my aspergers made me react with temperament to that change. I moved away, she dyed her hair red, got piercings, tatoos, full house of animals, guitar then she took kids and moved far away.

6 months later she returned crying - like a different person. We got a house, she got a job and I worked hard to make it a home. Then I found out that while she was away she was trying to be: a stripper, a cam girl, and she had guys offering her money for sex on email. I had a breakdown, we had a bad time again, but all was forgiven because we were not together and most of all - it did not suit her as I knew her, it sounded more like a really stupid things she would do.

Christmas came, she got all excited and lively, cooking, baking, making the house. She invited the entire family, organised everything, played games and took absolute lead. Then we went on a holiday, she still led the way. Then she made new friends, bought a dog, asked me to buy another dog.. Then all of sudden all that energy was lost and she crashed...

Things at home became absolute mess for weeks, s**t lying all over everything - If I spent hours making the place okay, she would turn it upside down within 5 minutes. Then she ended up in bed... She slept days, kids running around and she sleeps covered in the middle of the room when I am at work. Then she closed herself in another room, days without end. She had nothing to say to anyone, she seemed either emotionally numb and blank or psychotic and dramatic. She could not stand me talking 2 minutes, she would go away to her room. She would sleep there. She would not eat anything, she went skinny like skeleton. Depression.

We are still in that phase but things went on to extreme: she has not gone to work for weeks, made a lot of debt, left the children and the house and moved out with a dog to her mum's. She says she can't cope with children right now, or anyone for that matter - if anyone talks to her she takes a train and goes away.

We are all aware of the issue now, and so is she. Don't get me wrong guys - she is a good girl and she needs help, but it is so difficult for me to chase her when the house is falling on my head. She is in a phase she does not care about anything, not able to take on responsibility and foresee consequences of her actions. She went to a doctor and they gave her antidepressant. To my knowledge the highs should be treated as these cause the lows. I have swallowed the entire internet recently researching bipolar. One thing strikes me:

How the f**k could I live so many years with her and not come to this conclusion earlier? I mean I must be really fucktarded to have thought all is normal. But what I see is that ASD spectrum people generally get on well with Bipolar? Why would this be?

I want to help her, but I need to yet find strength and hence I am asking you guys about your advice, experiences and opinions, because this forum is always a source of logic, which is so much needed especially when I am dealing with someone else's emotional drama.

Hey jackinblack.

Sounds like she is in a depressive episode. If she has had manic/hypomanic episodes in the past, then she needs to get reevaluated by the physician for bipolar because antidepressants will not help her (assuming she was mistakenly diagnosed with major depressive disorder). It may actually lead to another manic state. She would most likely get prescribed mood stabilizers and/or anti-epileptic meds as these will help manage/prevent the manic and depressive episodes.



Sometimes when we're in the midst of something, we don't see it as well as someone who's observing from the outside, who may have a clearer perspective. I don't know the answer to your second question, so maybe someone else can answer it.