Reacting badly to moving to a different area
My step-dad is Irish so my family will be moving over there in about 3 or 4 years and want me to come with them. I'll have finished university by then and, apart from family, I don't really know anyone round here anyway, so I don't have many reasons to want to stay. My main problem is, I react very badly to change (due to AS) so I don't know how I will deal with this. I do want to move over there (I live in Manchester, England at the moment) but I'm not sure how I will react to it when it happens.
My mum thinks it will be better for me over there as we'd be moving to a much quieter area and I've been over there before and like it. So I just wanted to ask if anyone else has had problems moving to a completely different area before and, whether it is a good idea?
I have moved house a couple of times, but I am still living in the same area and family still live in the house I originally lived in so I still go over there. I didn't deal with it very well when we did move then, although I have got used to it now. So I do actually want to move there at some point as there aren't many reasons other than my AS that would make me want to stay here. I guess I'm just worried that, if I do go over there, I will completely mess up and end up depressed or something. Has anyone else ever moved to a completely different area and reacted particularly badly to that? And, if so, does it eventually improve or am I likely to be messed up permanently?
hartzofspace
Supporting Member
Joined: 14 Apr 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,138
Location: On the Road Less Traveled
I once moved from one state to another, for a new job. I lost considerable weight, and was so stressed out that I had trouble eating solid, healthy foods for at least a month before and after the move. I also became severely anemic. The combination of living in a new house, a new state, and starting a new job was enormously stressful. It did pass, however, after a month or two, and I learned to love my new place in life. While it is a big change, the more familiarity you keep around you, the better; family, familiar possessions, and habits. Hope that helps.
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Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born.
-- Dr. Dale Turner
I have moved quite a few times since I left home at 24. I had lived in the same house for 17 years and the same place for 22 years. So, I know what it is to uproot yourself. The first move was the best, I was single and could start clean, so to speak. I could do things I enjoyed on my own schedule. You can immerse yourself in Ireland or you can dip your toes in a bit at a time. You might want to check and make sure of any cultural differences that you might need to adjust to before you go.
One move to Indiana didn't go well at all and we never got used to it. The weather, the topography and people were just too different for us. The only friends we made were from other parts of the country (and they left Indiana when we did).
I think the main thing is to figure out what the local culture is like and how they'll treat you when you live there versus as a tourist.
I have moved around a lot too and I have held it fairly well. The reason I think I did ok was that I moved with my family so I was not alone and my mom talked about before hand so I would be ready. What helps me when we move is to be involved in it, like learning about the place I'm moving to, what my new room will be like, being there when the movers start packing, knowing that I will see everything soon, being allowed time to unpack, and knowing that I'm not alone because my family is with me. I'm not saying it is easy from me to move each time but I have learned how to deal with it.
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