Tactics of Manipulation Abusers Use On Women

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People with ASD are particularly vulnerable to abuse from those who are able to hide their intentions well. I would leave if anyone insulted or tried to hit me, but my father was a narcissist and I've always been vulnerable to people with personality disorders due to their specific type of psychological abuse. Being in a situation in which I can't work out someone's intentions still sends me into a tailspin of anxiety. I hate the fact my immediate impulse is to placate the person, as if they, like my father, will launch into unreasonable anger any moment. Because if this, I only like to meet men in familiar environments in which my judgement works well.

Unfortunately, my brother is in an abusive relationship at the moment. He's so stubborn that there's nothing we can do to help him except facilitate him should he wish to leave.

I always told myself I was too smart to end up in an abusive relationship. I had seen so many example of them (men and women both) that I knew there was no way I could fall for it, just like I could never join a cult. Unfortunately reality didn't quite work that way. Like League_Girl said it took me a long time to accept I was being abused because she never actually hit me and when she threw things it was usually several feet away from me. It was more passive aggressive, guilt trips, walking on eggshells, emotional outbursts, etc. in other words, just like my (extended) family.

I was actually talking to my lady, who is a feminist (not man hating) about this very subject last week. We talked about what we would say if we had a daughter to her when she started dating. The biggest thing we discussed is that abusive men/boys will say or do ANYTHING at first to get you in their grasp. They are complete and utter pros at it just like my childhood bully was and know how to fake kindness and empathy. They also know how to emotionally manipulate women to make them feel dependent on them and can do it so smoothly you never see it coming.

The love bombing... how can you tell it apart from the regular honeymoon/infatuation stage? Does it go in the feels too good to be true category?

[color=#00B2FF] My Problem with these types of post is it could be very well that the 'Abuse' they (women) say happens is because they say it.

I've never been in an abusive relationship, but I was psychologically abused by some people in high school. I remember one girl would do the nit picking tactic a lot with me. She would also gaslight, twist around things that I said and make me look like someone that I wasn't. She would try to isolate me too by turning people against me and would try to keep me from making any new friends.

I was psychologically abused by a friend when I was in high school. I guess I wasn't quite normal enough and he was embarrassed of me. The term he would usually use is that I needed to be more like a "regular guy." It worked out for the best though. He decided I wasn't cool enough for him to be friends with, so I had no friends for a little while, but eventually made a few new friends.

I guess there's no real way to tell the difference between love bombing and a genuinely nice person, at least at first. I think that's why abuse is so common and that's why I try to be as least judgmental as I can toward women in abusive relationships because it can happen to anyone. It's more a matter of bad luck than stupidity.

I guess the best way would be to identify the middle steps. For example, there's a difference between constructive criticism or a few negative comments here and there, and a continual pattern of negativity and dismissal.