Spying on a friend for his girlfriend?

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Ettina
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02 Jun 2016, 5:48 pm

OK, so my brother has a close friend who is at his house a lot. This friend has a girlfriend who is kind of clingy and pushy towards him. She and I kind of hit it off regarding a mutual interest in ASL, and she asked me for a favor. She and I exchanged phone numbers and she'll text me to ask if her boyfriend is at our house, because he ignores his phone while gaming. He knows that she's doing this and hasn't complained, but I don't know if he would complain if it bothered him. I do know that I sometimes feel a bit uncomfortable about doing this.
Is it really strange to ask someone else to report on your boyfriend's location like this? Do you think I should stop answering when she texts me? I'm kind of afraid of how she might act if she's mad at me, and currently we get along OK, but if her clinginess is crossing a line I don't want to be a party to it. Sometimes I also worry that she might be testing me and if I don't give the right answers she might think I'm cheating with her boyfriend, but I have no idea if that's just paranoia or an actual possibility.



kraftiekortie
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02 Jun 2016, 5:51 pm

To be honest, I don't think you should be doing this. I would probably refused this request.

Their relationship is their problem.



TheSpectrum
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02 Jun 2016, 5:52 pm

I would stay out of this. It's up to them to sort it out, and it might well be a test.

EDIT: Edited due to realising you're a girl :P I have a habit of reading things gender neutral here at times.


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rdos
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03 Jun 2016, 2:42 am

Given that they are already together, and she probably is clingy and jealous, I'd take no part in this whatsoever. It would be different if she wanted you to check him out before a possible relationship.



izzeme
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03 Jun 2016, 4:22 am

Don't assist in this.

If there is this little trust in their relationship, it is their problem, you don't want to get involved, for several reasons



TomS
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03 Jun 2016, 2:11 pm

Yeah, she is, in practical terms, using you as a spy. She might see it as what friends do, but somehow I doubt it fits in this situation. You didn't become friends on your own, but thru association.

So I would suggest backing away from it. How you do so depends on what your comfortable with. You can be direct, try to finesse it, or use a deception and maybe win an Oscar. (ie. My phone broke! Boo-Hoo)

Good luck!



0_equals_true
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03 Jun 2016, 2:39 pm

This isn't your responsibility, you have no responsibility to keep tabs on him.