Can you be asked to not tell people at work your autistic?

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Mbowx
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02 Jun 2016, 7:11 pm

If you've been successfully doing your job for a number of years and then get a aspergers diagnosis, is it ok for your employer to suggest you keep to yourself, just in case they lose business if people find out a believe that you aren't able to to do the job? Does it change things if you lead a team of people who look after severely traumatised children?

I would love to hear the views of others. I can see both sides of the argument but lean towards individual freedom.


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Fnord
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02 Jun 2016, 7:46 pm

It seems like good advice to me. Then again, I've been successful doing my job for a number of years and then got an Asperger's diagnosis. I'm an electrical engineer, and my co-workers think of me as eccentric. If I was to "come out" to them, it is likely that they would think of me as either crazy or ret*d, or both. I can't risk that.


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kraftiekortie
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02 Jun 2016, 7:59 pm

Why do you want to tell people you're Aspergian/Autistic. Is there some activist purpose?

If you do desire to take on the "activist" role, make sure your job is SECURE, and make sure you're indispensable to the company.



Mbowx
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02 Jun 2016, 8:23 pm

I'm not sure I want to be an activist, and whilst I am certainly not indispensable at work I am fairly well protected by employment law. They would need to prove I can't do my job. I am not particularly good at all the cloak and dagger stuff. I work with and direct the treatment for children some of whom are autistic, me being autistic influences my work sometimes positively and some times not so positively. Either way it can be very strange talking about autism and the experience of being autistic in relation to others in a meeting, listening to people suggested that someone can't or won't be able to do this or that or that they must experience things this way or that way. It's scary how many professionals still have very out dated and inaccurate views on autism. I just want to sometimes tell them that they are wrong, that being autistic doesn't mean there is only one future that there are lots of possibilities.

Ok so I started by saying I didn't want to be an activist, seems that might not be wholly accurate, maybe I need to give this some more thought. I think I just want to be accepted for who I am, it can be really hard work hiding it. Not that, that would change if I told people. It makes me sad to think that people I've known for years would see me differently, after all I haven't changed.


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kraftiekortie
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02 Jun 2016, 8:35 pm

All right. Now it makes sense. You work with autistic people. Why not let people know that you have the "inside track," so to speak.

And I do understand, definitely, that you want to be judged by the job that you're doing, rather than some "disorder."

And I realize that you're probably in the UK, which has more teeth in their anti-discrimination laws than the US does.

Still....people are judgmental, and might not receive the fact that you're autistic too well, despite the fact that they (should) have more knowledge pertaining to autism than the average laymen.

Did your boss explain WHY you shouldn't reveal your autism?



carbonmonoxide
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03 Jun 2016, 1:23 am

Your situation seems to be similar to my own. I will pm you later during the day if you don't mind.



izzeme
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03 Jun 2016, 4:30 am

The reasoning given is somewhat iffy, i wouldn't like to hear that reason for keeping things secret.
However, the advice is sound; it is better to keep your diagnosis to yourself, and only disclose to coworkers/bosses/clients and other people on a need-to-know basis: tell them only the specific traits and issues, leaving out the whole "i'm autistic" bit.



Mbowx
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03 Jun 2016, 6:46 am

My boss wasn't very clear about his reasoning, I think they are concerned about the reaction of others. They didn't react to well to finding out I was autistic, the first response was to question whether someone with aspergers could do my job. I'd been doing for 4 years at that point and passed all of my annual evaluations and meet all of the targets I was set. The fear is (and I understand it) that if somebody I manage knows I'm autistic and has a problem they will blame poor management due to the autism and that if the authorities that commission us to do work find out that the person that leads the treatment for their child is autistic they will react as my bosses did and assume I, an autistic person can't do the job. I understand there position, I'm just not sure how it leaves me feeling, I am very good at my job I enjoy it and for all my understanding I guess I think it is fundamentally wrong that I or anyone else should have to hide apart of themselves for fear of judgement or the response of others. I should be judge on what I can do just like everyone else. I know that's not how things are though, so I guess they can ask me not to disclose.


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kraftiekortie
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03 Jun 2016, 7:21 am

Pardon me for saying this:

The people you work for are a business. They want to stay solvent.

Solvency is based upon trusting the employees.

People have these stupid notions about autism. If they find out that an employee is autistic, they might not patronize the business.

Hence, the business becomes insolvent. And you're out of a job.



Mbowx
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03 Jun 2016, 7:44 am

With the best will in the world, the people I work for are a charity and it's a sad world if the argument for being able to carry on in this way is that it hurts business.


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kraftiekortie
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03 Jun 2016, 7:45 am

Of course it's sad.

I'm not advocating that sort of thinking. I don't believe in the crap myself.

I don't like this situation.

But the charity has to remain solvent, too.

To me, "hiding" the fact that you're autistic is the same as "hiding" your personal life outside of work.

You're not being dishonest if you don't reveal what you do outside of work.

You're not being "dishonest" by hiding your autism. Especially since it doesn't affect how you do your job.

Autism is a part of you--but it's not the total you.



kraftiekortie
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03 Jun 2016, 7:52 am

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything.

Is there something to be gained by revealing your autism?

I'm thinking that you want to be honest with people--which is laudable.

And that you can prove that people with autism can "do the job" by revealing that you have autism--which is laudable, too.

Am I right?



Mbowx
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03 Jun 2016, 7:53 am

Yes you are right.


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kraftiekortie
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03 Jun 2016, 7:54 am

I know how you feel.

My life is an open book, and I tend to tell people too much myself.

I can identify with what you're feeling--even though it seems as if I don't.



Mbowx
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03 Jun 2016, 7:55 am

Thank you.


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kraftiekortie
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03 Jun 2016, 7:58 am

There is this principle in drug treatment: the best "treaters" are drug addicts/ex drug-addicts themselves.

Perhaps, people should apply this to autistic people taking care of fellow autistic people.

You have the "inside track"--just like drug addicts in the above illustration.