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infilove
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09 Aug 2016, 1:56 am

I've learned some of common causes/reasons that typically make people with Asperger's upset. 1) They sometimes struggle to clearly identify what’s upsetting them. 2) They clearly identified what's upsetting them but have trouble expressing it to others. 3) Being overwealmed. 4) They sometimes feel like they are being neglected- not being cared to be understood. 5) They often feel like they’re different, want to fit in, and be accepted. 6) Heightened sensativity. 7) Being aware of multiple reasons that lead to frustration. Many frustrating situations are caused by more than one frustrating reason instead of just one. 8) When they feel like people don't care. 9) Struggle with "change." 10) "Autism Excelleration". 11) Having a hard for them to snap out of an emotional state. 12) Short term memory struggles- causing everday tasks at school/jobs, following directions, and processing information harder. 13) Emotions can sometimes be more intense and focused. 14) Not knowing why a frustrating or undesirable situation is happening the way it is. 15) They often don’t like getting upset at situations they know other people typically don’t get upset about.

Do you agree or disagree with the mentioned reasons? Do you know any other reasons? Please share your feedback.


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AJisHere
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10 Aug 2016, 2:33 am

Sounds like you've pretty much got it. Those are all fairly normal, from what I've seen and experienced.


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Biscuitman
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10 Aug 2016, 3:35 am

When my days plans are altered at the last minute e.g just before leaving work one day and I am asked to be in a meeting at 9:00am the next morning......in London.

That is waking up early, driving to another town to park, getting a train (4th busiest in the country according to recent report so you push people to get on and stand all the way) getting the underground, change at Oxford Circus, get another underground, walk for 10 minutes near London Bridge to find the office.



ASPartOfMe
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10 Aug 2016, 4:51 am

Failure to live up to expectations from others and themselves to be as "normal" as possible.


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PerrySmider Jr
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10 Aug 2016, 9:04 am

That sounds about right. I fly off the handle over small things like someone's shoes being placed on top of mine, coffee cups not being put in the dishwasher, the hamper being too full. I know those are just triggers and my real problem is having my schedule change from unforeseen circumstances. My anger builds up and I explode. I tend to get violent which is not good for the family. I even though they might be better off without me. I yelled at my child when it was not warranted and I think it is because he started school and it changed what I was used to not doing for three months and it just overwhelmed me. I hate to say this because I was brought up that a man should not be emotional and become frustrated so easily. I try to embody my grandfather and dad, they are so easy going. I just can't be them.



Rachel184
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11 Aug 2016, 6:02 am

That sums it up pretty well, really. There's also the elements of loneliness, abandonment, and friendships turning sour when you make a social mistake. I get that so much, and it sucks pretty bad, but I just have to push through it.



untilwereturn
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11 Aug 2016, 7:27 am

Pretty much all of those things apply to me, too. I think that especially when I was younger, I had a hard time identifying the specific thing that frustrated or overwhelmed me. I'm a little better now at identifying and articulating why I'm upset.

I've also learned to avoid some situations that really wear me down. One of those things is online debates. I used to enjoy challenging people, but when the debate became extended or I got into multiple debates with multiple people in the same day, I'd be absolutely drained and in a foul mood by the end of the day. I didn't always make the connection between the mental energy expense and the bad mood that followed.

I've made peace with the fact that people can be wrong on the Internet, and it's not necessarily my job to set them straight.


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ouroborosUK
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11 Aug 2016, 1:08 pm

I'm skeptical of all attempts to describe things common to "all aspies", but as far as I am concerned this list matches my sources of worries quite accurately.


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12 Aug 2016, 2:52 am

untilwereturn wrote:
Pretty much all of those things apply to me, too. I think that especially when I was younger, I had a hard time identifying the specific thing that frustrated or overwhelmed me. I'm a little better now at identifying and articulating why I'm upset.

I've also learned to avoid some situations that really wear me down. One of those things is online debates. I used to enjoy challenging people, but when the debate became extended or I got into multiple debates with multiple people in the same day, I'd be absolutely drained and in a foul mood by the end of the day. I didn't always make the connection between the mental energy expense and the bad mood that followed.

I've made peace with the fact that people can be wrong on the Internet, and it's not necessarily my job to set them straight.



I identify with this. Even if my daughter texts me too much I start feeling overwhelmed and panicky. I don't even think I'm angry, just distressed, but apparently it comes across as anger.

As for correcting people on the interent - I too have to REALLY restrain myself!! However when it comes to interpersonal relationships, if someone says something like "you're always really difficult" I get really upset/angry and feel like I can't cope because it's not true - I can be difficult 'sometimes' - not all the time. But I find it really hard, in the moment, to explain the strength of my feelings and it's only later on, when I've calmed down, that I rememeber people exaggerate... I exhaust myself sometimes in my quest for the truth and exactitude!



INTPnarwhal
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16 Aug 2016, 1:09 am

The common question, "how are you," is a real stumper for me. I almost always go for the scripted answer of "good". Otherwise I'd take forever to figure it out and keep changing my mind.