Page 4 of 4 [ 57 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4

postpaleo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Feb 2007
Age: 69
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,134
Location: North Mirage, Pennsyltucky

14 May 2007, 11:11 pm

lowfreq50 wrote:
One time I said "I guess if you're going to kill someone it should be a kid, because it's not like they're real people yet."


Oops! Should have not said that! And that was IRL.


A mentor of mine was a Reformed Druid (she had a PHD, and was serious, smart as hell and could think out of the box, obviously). My wife asked what the reformed ment. "We don't kill kids anymore."


_________________
Just enjoy what you do, as best you can, and let the dog out once in a while.


TrishC7
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 15 Apr 2007
Age: 61
Gender: Female
Posts: 312
Location: Kansas City area

15 May 2007, 5:37 am

I probably come across as 'weird' to people because I alternate between being pretty quiet (coping mechanism) and blathering on about things, on the rare occasions when I'm in a really social situation. I do have 'good days' where I seem to manage a good balance, but I can never count on it. I'm more comfortable with just a couple or three people, anyway, that I know well.



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 41,728
Location: Houston, Texas

15 May 2007, 4:39 pm

willem wrote:
From http://bcsdesign.com/comedyzone/poop.shtml:

THE POOPIE LIST


GHOST POOPIE:
You feel it come out, but there's no poopie in the toilet!


CLEAN POOPIE:
The poopie comes out and you see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper! Also see UPPER-CLASS POOPIE.


WET POOPIE:
Even after wiping your butt 50 times, it still feels unwiped. You end up putting some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear, so you don't get a nasty poopie stain.


SECOND WAVE POOPIE:
Happens when you stand up after poopie-ing and start to pull your pants up. You suddenly realize that you have to poopie some more.


"POP A VEIN IN YOUR FOREHEAD" POOPIE:
A poopie that causes you to strain so much, you practically have a stroke.


LINCOLN LOG POOPIE:
The poopie is so big, you're afraid to flush without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.


GASSY POOPIE:
So noisy, everyone within earshot starts giggling.


DRINKER POOPIE:
Occurs after a long night of drinking. Most noticeable trait is the skidmarks in the toilet bowl.


CORN POOPIE:
Self explanatory.


NUT POOPIE:
Self explanatory.


"GEE, I WISH I COULD POOPIE" POOPIE:
You'd really like to poopie, but all you do is siton the toilet and fart a few times. Refer to WET POOPIE should you take Ex-Lax® to alleviate the problem.


SPINAL TAP POOPIE:
A poopie that hurts so much on the way out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways!


WET CHEEKS POOPIE:
A poopie that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with toilet water. Also referred to as a Power Dump.


LIQUID POOPIE:
Characterized by a yellowish-brown liquid that shoots out your butt andsplashes all over the toilet bowel. Also see MEXICAN POOPIE.


UPPER-CLASS POOPIE:
Leaves no odor and may also have the characteristics of a CLEAN POOPIE.


SURPRISE POOPIE:
You're not near the toilet and think you are just going to fart ... but oops! ... it's a poopie!!


THE DANGLING POOPIE:
A tough poopie that refuses to drop into the toilet, even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose. Also referred to as a Klingon.


This reminds me of the diarrhea song from the movie Parenthood.

Tim


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!


tomart
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 127
Location: southern New Jersey

20 May 2007, 2:48 am

BazzaMcKenzie wrote:
Maybe I should have said "merchant banker".
tell me if you need help to work that out - lol

Yeah, I needed help to work that out. Richard Cranium is a clever enough substitution with the two keys right there to translate it, as Merle demonstrated, but "merchant banker" means, what, "shopkeeper wanker"? Trader Lender? How's an American supposed to know that when we don't even use the word wanker?

From Wikipedia: "And so the merchant's "benches" (bank is a corruption of the Italian for bench, as in a counter) in the great grain markets became centers for holding money against a bill (billette, a note, a letter of formal exchange, later a bill of exchange, later still, a cheque)."

No, I haven't been too literal my whole life... Only a few decades. :wink:

postpaleo wrote:
My wife asked what the reformed meant. "We don't kill kids anymore."

My smart-as-hell nurse friend would joke like that, between ER stories such as things they had to extract from people's um, how would you English people put it, "mass wholes." Or "class tolls" or "glass voles." :roll:


_________________
Sit simplex stulte (Keep it simple)


tomart
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 127
Location: southern New Jersey

20 May 2007, 3:44 am

Shale wrote:
It comes down to learning how much to say, I think.
Group discussion is like a dance, not a forum. On forums, we can say as much as we please in one post because readers read at different speeds and times.
ONLY continue if they want you to. Get in there with one or two appropriately-timed sentences, make them interesting.
Wait your turn again.
You'll notice there's always one or two star players in the group that ALWAYS get to tell long stories and be the centre of attention. These people, usually, are already respected by the group or have a good method of making what they have to say interesting and relevant to everyone. Read the signs well, and you'll find it easy enough to get to do that every now and again.
People don't need to know your lifelong bibliographical opinion ... no big rants on tender subjects.
...eventually learning generically what will be received well and what won't.
...knowing how to extract one's foot, and then avoid putting it in one's mouth again in the future is an art we ALL have to learn :)
Good summary, Shale :D Wish I'd read it in my youth.


_________________
Sit simplex stulte (Keep it simple)


tomart
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 127
Location: southern New Jersey

20 May 2007, 4:17 am

sinsboldly wrote:
There's a shameless game of moral chicken that war supporters play in which they dare opponents to say the war is a mistake because, they claim, saying so would then dishonor all the men and women who've already died in its cause.

So to spare the dead that ignominy
Not the dead; (I don't think they suffer ignominy) it's for the living, the relatives, who should be rising up and demanding accountability, impeaching and punishing those who ignored the whole world's protests and caused this debacle. In fact I don't believe it was "a mistake." I believe our mendacious and criminal administration KNEW what they were doing and did it anyway, knowing they had the Congress, Judiciary and major media locked up. Fascists love war, and war profits. :x
sinsboldly wrote:
I can't say a thing about the occupation of Iraq at work, I can't even mention it is an occupation instead of a 'war'... it is TABOO.
_______________________________
"When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross"
- Sinclair Lewis


_________________
Sit simplex stulte (Keep it simple)


JakeG
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 653
Location: England

20 May 2007, 9:43 am

BazzaMcKenzie wrote:
But into a conversation and say, "my belly button lint is always blue" and see what happens to the conversation


Most peoples' belly button lint is blue. It is just because most clothes fibres are blue - even in white shirts.



lostartist
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 64
Location: Georgia

21 May 2007, 7:34 am

Bellybutton Lint Collection

Here you go. Enjoy!



9CatMom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,403

21 May 2007, 9:10 am

I thought the POOPIE post was funny!



nb411
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jan 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 597

22 May 2007, 7:52 am

lowfreq50 wrote:
One time I said "I guess if you're going to kill someone it should be a kid, because it's not like they're real people yet."


Oops! Should have not said that! And that was IRL.


I find that hilarious. I don't agree with it but it's funny especially in the context of thread...anyways,

I only say inappropriate things when people ask me questions, either rhetorical types on non-serious and I give them an honest answer. Sometimes they don't like what they hear :) I think I have a very dark sense of humour, sarcastic as well as crude. I often feel myself holding back even on here, because some things I find amusing are a bit of the strong sauce.



tomart
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 127
Location: southern New Jersey

22 May 2007, 1:34 pm

nb411 wrote:
I think I have a very dark sense of humour, sarcastic as well as crude. I often feel myself holding back even on here, because some things I find amusing are a bit of the strong sauce.

Yeah, I often hold back for the same reason. And my nurse friend is even more so, but doesn't hold back.


_________________
Sit simplex stulte (Keep it simple)


Pandora
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jun 2005
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,553
Location: Townsville

07 Aug 2007, 7:51 am

I get into a bit of trouble for talking about taboo subjects like operations, bodily functions, politics (though not always - there is a man who sometimes gets on the same bus as me in the afternoon and he and I have had some good conversations about the gulf war and suchlike - he used to be a soldier but got injured in the leg some years ago), rubbish, dead animals and other grotty topics.

It's not meant to gross people out usually (unless they have p'ed me off) - I think I just mustn't have grown up in some areas. My daughter says I am sick to think fart jokes are hilarious. Even thinking of fart noises is funny.


_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon