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Mack01
Hummingbird
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Joined: 31 Aug 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: United Kingdom

31 Aug 2016, 5:38 pm

Hi all. Hope you are all well.


So as the title suggests, I'd like to offer help to those of you wanting to improve your friend-making skills.

That's the sole reason why Im on this site to be honest. I've never being diagnosed with autism, and am not about to give the impression that i do have it. But for the past decade I've being overcoming my shortcomings in terms of socialising. Also, having only recently discovering the term, I've spent the past 2 years interacting with the social anxiety community online.

Nowadays I'm only focusing on those wanting to improve their social skills and situations. Having helped someone who's getting diagnosed for autism, I thought that others like her might benefit from my help. So here I am!

And so here's the outlay of what I do: the person would attend a weekly social activity for 12 weeks (some activities are more suitable than others regarding the social aims), during which I'd be giving them weekly tasks, based on helping them to integrate, illustrating social aspects and helping learn about their situation so I can help you more. My aim would be to give them the momentum to then continue improving without my assistance. And no, I'm not asking for money.

Now I'm clear that this may not be suitable for particular types of autism. And even for those of you who may find it suitable, take note that your social ills will not all disappear in 12 weeks. But for those who just want to be able to make new friends.... well, as long you're focused, open-minded and committed, then I'll do my best help you achieve your goal. 

Now only 3 people have done the full time requested by myself, and so I'm not guaranteeing anything. But these people who have tried it have all had positive experiences. Their increased confidence also seems to have influenced other areas of their lives. And regarding the autistic person, I do feel her autism may have worked to her advantage in this case. I'm hoping this would happen for other people too.

So for those who want to try the plan out, just let me know via PM, and if you have questions, feel free to ask. Just to let you guys know, im not going to be available in the month of October (I'm travelling). But still, feel free to contact and we can see what can be done.

 
Mack



Jacoby
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Joined: 10 Dec 2007
Age: 32
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Posts: 14,284
Location: Permanently banned by power tripping mods lol this forum is trash

31 Aug 2016, 5:44 pm

Ugh, thanks for the offer. Can I see your qualifications before sending my personal information? :roll:



the_phoenix
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Joined: 30 Jan 2008
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Posts: 2,489
Location: up from the ashes

31 Aug 2016, 5:56 pm

Round trip airfare back and forth across the pond to the UK is included, right? :)

I do see where you're coming from.
I've been taking 8-week painting classes.
Yes, classes, because I liked the first round of classes so much
I signed up for two more.

And because of this, my artwork will now be on display in a public venue
for three months!



Mack01
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 31 Aug 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: United Kingdom

01 Sep 2016, 1:18 pm

Jacoby wrote:
Ugh, thanks for the offer. Can I see your qualifications before sending my personal information? :roll:

Well I don't see how that's relevant since I haven't spoken about being qualified in anything. Well I do have business management and accounting related qualification. Will me scanning the certificates and sending them to you be good enough for you to send me this personal info I never actually asked for?



Mack01
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 31 Aug 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: United Kingdom

01 Sep 2016, 1:40 pm

the_phoenix wrote:
Round trip airfare back and forth across the pond to the UK is included, right? :)

I do see where you're coming from.
I've been taking 8-week painting classes.
Yes, classes, because I liked the first round of classes so much
I signed up for two more.

And because of this, my artwork will now be on display in a public venue
for three months!

Even though I'm more focused on the social aspects, I have to congratulate you on the public artwork display, that's a brilliant achievement to achieve.

Now I know you're all famous now but sadly that gets you no priveleges: if i have to throw in return trips to the UK, it's gonna have to be economy class and nothing more. My genoristy does have its limits, you know!

Seriously though, it's funny because the first person I did help (out of the 3 I mentioned earlier), she took an art class as well. And she loved the activity as well, perhaps more than she liked making friends. To be honest, there's quite a few discussion points it raises but for now, I'm just glad you had a good experience. And I hope you made some friends too.



Mack01
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 31 Aug 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: United Kingdom

03 Sep 2016, 6:44 am

Agh, I don't how to edit my original post. But anyway, as stated before, in October I'm travelling abroad and won't be on the forum. So anyone curious enough might like to try out 2-3 weekly sessions with a social activity accompanied by my guidance during September. This should give you an idea of whether or not you'd like to continue. And when the 3 weeks is done, I'd even welcome your honest feedback on this thread, providing you actually adhered to my guidance (otherwise the opinion wouldn't be fair on myself).

If anyone knows how I can edit my original post to include this addition, I'd appreciate your input. Thanks.



Mack01
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 31 Aug 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: United Kingdom

05 Oct 2016, 8:04 pm

Hi all. 

So I'm in the Caribbean on holiday. Whilst I'd been stuck inside due to Hurricane Matthew (though others had had it a lot worse) I decided to catch up on some private messages. With people asking several times how the communication works, I decided that rather than repeating myself, I'd add it to this thread, to help future readers be more informed.

In order to say what we will be talking about, it may be easier first to inform of what we WON'T be talking about. Bare with me.

One request I would also ask of you is to have a cheap notebook or a Word document. This will be a private “diary”  entirely for your viewing only – this won't be part of our communication, but it is very important by myself that you do this request. For this document, each week I would like for you to write and fill out the following 5 sections:
 
A) The tasks for the social activity session  - these are the essential tasks. I adhere adapt the tasks to reflect yourself and the situation as you progress. The tasks may not even be challenging at all to you. Pushing you to breaking point is NOT my priority. 
B) The results of your attempts at each tasks. This should not be a summarised paragraph.
C) Additional insights/ optional advice & tasks. Although completely optional, doing these will make for a more complete experience. Often these can be set-ups to make future "A" tasks easier. This section would also include my response to the prior week's part D.
D) Questions that you may want to ask me (so that you don't forget).
E) A free from passage of text regarding this journey. You can say whatever you want, but it should be a minimum of 70 words.

And so you would have filled out this each week for 12 weeks. 

Although pretty essential to your success, this diary would be for your eyes only. This template however does aid in illustrating the ideal messaging structure. Using the points above, the basic week should be as follows, but it can be flexible: 

- me messaging A & C
- you adding A & C to your diary
- you going to the social activity sessions, doing task A
- you messaging with B & D
- you filling your diary with B, C and E
- repeat process

Hopefully through this you'll be doing the additional tips for C but that's up to you. And, that's roughly all we'd be doing for 12 weeks, allowing for clarifications where needed of course. Hopefully this way would make things straightforward and easier to follow.