What Do You (As An Aspie) Get Out Of WP?

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nurseangela
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15 Sep 2016, 10:41 pm

Howdy! It's me, Miss NT. I was just wondering, if Aspies say they hate socializing and "small talk", what are your reasons for coming on WP?

For me, Miss NT, it is to socialize and do my favorite thing - the dreaded "s" word of "small talk". :mrgreen:

What about you? Inquiring NT minds would like to know.


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Grammar Geek
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15 Sep 2016, 10:52 pm

To talk to like-minded people who understand me and the share the struggles I go through. The world is populated by people many of us don't understand, so it's nice to talk to people who are on the same wavelength as I am.

And socializing on a forum is a heck of a lot different than socializing in real life. You can take as much time as you want on here to formulate a well-thought-out response, whereas in real-life social situations, you have to think on your feet if you don't want to seem like "the slow one."



Britte
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15 Sep 2016, 11:26 pm

_^ what Grammar Geek said, for the most part...

...the games threads.

...the music threads.



Clakker
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15 Sep 2016, 11:36 pm

Quote:
And socializing on a forum is a heck of a lot different than socializing in real life.

I would even go one step further and say that many of the exchanges on WP bypass some social etiquette and NT social behavior, all together. Many of the more impassioned posts seem a bit too blunt for NT socializing. The posts don't tend to sugarcoat things and are more straightforward. There's less use of euphemisms and idiomatic expressions. Even though, I came to know about WP by reading about someone who had been banned for overly aggressive posts bordering on ad hominem attacks, I have, yet, to read anything that even comes close.


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nurseangela
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15 Sep 2016, 11:39 pm

Grammar Geek wrote:
To talk to like-minded people who understand me and the share the struggles I go through. The world is populated by people many of us don't understand, so it's nice to talk to people who are on the same wavelength as I am.

And socializing on a forum is a heck of a lot different than socializing in real life. You can take as much time as you want on here to formulate a well-thought-out response, whereas in real-life social situations, you have to think on your feet if you don't want to seem like "the slow one."


This is a good answer. Since there are "fun" threads on WP such as the "Love" threads and "Game" threads, would you say that Aspies to a small degree do enjoy getting together with others and socializing? There are some problem-solving threads, I know, and informational threads, but there are quite a few threads surrounding social topics like video games, television and sports. This was just something that I have been wondering for awhile. Unless one just comes here to try to get help for a problem, the rest just seems social to me and something that Aspies have said they really don't like. Am I getting it wrong?


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


nurseangela
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15 Sep 2016, 11:43 pm

Clakker wrote:
Quote:
And socializing on a forum is a heck of a lot different than socializing in real life.

I would even go one step further and say that many of the exchanges on WP bypass some social etiquette and NT social behavior, all together. Many of the more impassioned posts seem a bit too blunt for NT socializing. The posts don't tend to sugarcoat things and are more straightforward. There's less use of euphemisms and idiomatic expressions. Even though, I came to know about WP by reading about someone who had been banned for overly aggressive posts bordering on ad hominem attacks, I have, yet, to read anything that even comes close.


I agree with you to a point, however, I have been over on AC and their atmosphere is totally different - more polite. I think that WP relaxes the rules a bit and also ventures out to have such topics as Politics and Religion which are real "hot buttons". I think WP is a much more larger community, as well, an may be harder to patrol than AC.


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Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


kraftiekortie
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15 Sep 2016, 11:50 pm

It's not that Aspie/autistic people don't crave pleasurable human company.

It's that they are somewhat AWKWARD when pursuing pleasurable human company.

Tony Attwood basically says the above.



nurseangela
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16 Sep 2016, 12:11 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
It's not that Aspie/autistic people don't crave pleasurable human company.

It's that they are somewhat AWKWARD when pursuing pleasurable human company.

Tony Attwood basically says the above.


I see forums as more "social" than actual human contact. There really isn't any human contact such as eye contact, touch or even voice - just words and sometimes pictures if someone is open enough to post one. That could be why no real "bonds" are made.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


Clakker
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16 Sep 2016, 12:55 am

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I have been over on AC and their atmosphere is totally different - more polite.

What's AC? I'm a recluse and new to forums. I'm here to understand what does it actually mean to be ASD for other people? I have never met anybody who has said they're Asperger/HFA but I'm in Germany and Germans are weird (i.e. many Aspie traits seem to be their normal behavior- tantrums because things aren't going according to plan, insisting on following the rules, prosody, egocentric worldview, knowitall-ism, forgetting to be nice :lol:)


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nurseangela
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16 Sep 2016, 1:20 am

Clakker wrote:
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I have been over on AC and their atmosphere is totally different - more polite.

What's AC? I'm a recluse and new to forums. I'm here to understand what does it actually mean to be ASD for other people? I have never met anybody who has said they're Asperger/HFA but I'm in Germany and Germans are weird (i.e. many Aspie traits seem to be their normal behavior- tantrums because things aren't going according to plan, insisting on following the rules, prosody, egocentric worldview, knowitall-ism, forgetting to be nice :lol:)


Aspies Central. It's a forum too. I'm a hermit, kinda sounds the same as your recluse. :mrgreen:
I'm 25% German too, and 75% I have no freaking clue. (Hey! That rhymed!) :mrgreen:


_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


SpaceAgeBushRanger
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16 Sep 2016, 1:29 am

The way people talk on Wrongplanet and other autistic websites feels more relevant to my life than most other forms of media I could consume. The people are nice here, many are good writers, and sometimes and interesting link will turn up.



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16 Sep 2016, 2:02 am

brain exercise


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ArielsSong
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16 Sep 2016, 3:40 am

nurseangela wrote:
Howdy! It's me, Miss NT. I was just wondering, if Aspies say they hate socializing and "small talk", what are your reasons for coming on WP?

For me, Miss NT, it is to socialize and do my favorite thing - the dreaded "s" word of "small talk". :mrgreen:

What about you? Inquiring NT minds would like to know.



For me, it's the opposite. Conversation WITHOUT the small talk.

I've used forums for as long as I've been using the internet. It's always for the thought-provoking questions or in-depth discussions. I don't enjoy chat threads. I like ones that are based on a topic and make me think a bit.

And, others have said, speaking on a forum is very different to 'real life'. Here, you have as long as you want to formulate your responses.



mikeman7918
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16 Sep 2016, 4:40 am

I'm here for a number of reasons.

It's easier to socialize over the Internet then in real life. In the words of Alex Plank: "it's almost as if the Internet were designed for autistic people". Being able to take your time to plan out everything carefully and not having to worry about deciphering or producing body language, face expressions, vocal inflection, or anything like that really makes it easier. I usually do most of my socializing through the Internet on any given day.

It's nice to talk to like-minded people. The vast majority of the world's population is made up of people who can't relate with a lot of the things I go through and it's nice to know that I'm not alone. It makes me feel more included then I'm used to and it's great to not be the weird one for once.

I often use forums as a way of controlling my obsessions. If I start obsessing over something then I often go to a corresponding forum and use that to get that out of my system so I don't feel so compelled to talk about that stuff all the time. That's how I ended up on WP in the first place.


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AJisHere
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16 Sep 2016, 5:23 am

I'd hoped to find like-minded people, but found almost none and haven't really been able to follow up much with the few I did locate. After that I tried finding some useful advice on coping with my ASD related problems, but I think that well may have already run dry.

It's been... enlightening, which is good. But it hasn't made me feel very good. Sometimes what you thought might be a solution just turns out to be a new facet of the problem.


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lazyflower
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16 Sep 2016, 6:17 am

I don't have any friends in real life, who are on the autistic spectrum. So really just to communicate and learn more about other aspies.