How you come across online vs. in real life

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Communicating online is easier for me. You have time to think about what you're going to say. Plus, I think I come across as less awkward online as opposed to IRL.

I think for the most part I am the same in either place. Out in public my pointedness and intimidating looks work against me sometimes but on here the looks don't matter and my pointedness is subdued by the fact that most of us are a little more to the point than most people. In either setting though, I am eager to help, share, and I always try to be respectful. Although I tend not to by as cynical on here as I am in real life. Maybe it's the subject matter that I respond to...but offline I can be a real wise-ass. Kind Regards Shark

Great thread question by the way!! !

I would agree that communicating online is a lot easier, in real life I have a whole lot of issues I'm sure you folks are all to familiar with. More anxious, less engaging, more in my own head, I don't know how I come off to other people to be honest. Online isn't easy tho, it use to be easier I thought as I use to have friends online but not so much anymore which I think social media is partly to blame but for some reason I've regressed as well. I feel like I can 'preform' in person socially and be on in short bursts with people I am comfortable with . I don't know how others perceive me.

I don't know how I come across to people online or offline. If I knew, I wouldn't be autistic.

I communicate far better in writing than through speech. I do well giving prepared speeches in Toastmasters, but small talk continues to make me anxious.

Thanks for all the comments here - it's really helping me to understand this issue better!

What I've learned over the years is that "just being myself" online is a recipe for failure. So my challenge is to learn how to express myself honestly, but in a way that comes across better, and prevents misunderstandings.

Things I've learned the hard way:
- Don't overuse smilies. Some people find that annoying.
- If someone is rude to me, try to be honest but polite in return.

Things I still need to work on:
- How to offer support in a way that is helpful.

I'm particularly terrible at that last one. I care deeply about people who are going through a difficult time, but when I try to offer encouragement, suggestions, or commiseration, it's usually not at all what the person wanted to hear. So I think I'll quietly observe how other people offer support, and see if I can identify what works, and what doesn't.

I know I'm annoyingly analytical about all this. But it's how I make progress!

I think I come off as more social online. In person, I am incredibly shy and rarely speak unless spoken to first. I also probably appear higher-functioning online than in person. No one can see me flapping my arms, rocking back and forth all the time, and making little noises constantly through a computer or my tablet. Because of that, I feel more confident. Plus, I think that the people here understand me much more than the people I know in real life, so I'm less afraid to be myself and I come out of my shell (so to speak).

Speaking of guinea pigs, I have two and they are absolutely adorable!

I feel more welcomed online, like I can join almost any conversation and people care what I say as much as they care what other people say. At school I'm the weird one always one minute behind every conversation, asking unrelated questions and ranting about my opinions on things, and at home and with friends I'm continuously making noises and stimming.

Definitely an awesome guinea pig! Reminds me of a Pink Fairy Armadillo:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pink_fairy_armadillo

Back on topic, I'm realizing that I am capable of learning better social interaction skills online, and that it's possible I might learn to 'connect' better here, in a way that reflects who I truly am, and how I feel - whereas in real life I see that as a hopelessly impossible goal, and so I just keep smiling and nodding and trying to fit in.