Humor in Autism...

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Hi, I am an Individual Needs Assistant in the UK who works 1-1 with a 5 year old boy with autism in a mainstream school and part time 1-1 with a 3 year old boy with autism in the attached nursery. I have been doing this for a year. I started the job without any experience and without any particular idea as to what would develop. What has entailed has been an extraordinary year that has lead me on a journey of discovery that I could never have imagined. I have had the pleasure of working with some amazing professionals and other care workers, but by far the experience and adventure of working with the 5 year old autistic boy has been the most extraordinary. At first I found it very difficult – the other care worker had been with him for 4 months is an incredibly caring person, also found it really difficult – as did the little boy who was trying to fit into a school system, which made very little sense to him (it doesn’t make that much sense to me!). He had been at a nursery where generally he was in a room on his own to safeguard the other children… To cut a long story short, at present he is a very happy child. He is getting incredible social skills integration, is adored by the other children in the school, by the PE teacher, by the caretaker and most teachers... He has gone from mainly non-verbal to chatterbox, draws, makes models, and is beginning to write stories. He also does maths, spelling, in his own way of course. He is, at the top of the list, completely hilarious! His sense of humour is brilliant. That is of course on a good day… every day throws up events that can lead to frustration and raised stress levels, anger, sadness and aggression. The key to getting him back is humour and creativity, once his curiosity is pricked by something and he laughs – bang, stress levels drop and we’re off again. It’s a joy!

Why am I posting here? Well, as well as working as a Needs Assistant, I am a writer and a writing teacher and before that I was a Portfolio Analyst in the City of London. A friend of mine who runs a social enterprise that works with diversity in education (disability/ dyslexia) recently said to me (as I was recounting yet another story about the wonders of working with Autism), that I seemed to have an ability to bring the story to life… a small seed planted in my head. A week later I thought, hold on a minute, I have a lot of skills in analysis, I have writing skills, I love the humour and complete anarchic joy that seems to be part of the job I am doing – why not take this further…

I do not know what role humour plays in an autistic persons or autistic parent’s life. I know the parent of the child I work with find humour in him. I know that humour lowers stress levels in this boy, if I get him to laugh and his says ‘You funny’, then I can get him happy, and then everything becomes possible. So to cut a long story a little bit shorter, I would like to write a book on the humour in Autism, it sounds wrong, but I think in it there is a right! I would like to receive as many stories as possible from people with autism, parents with autistic children, carers/ therapist etc. and then I am going to analyse the stories and start to see which elements are key to them, what humour/emotion/ situation and so forth. Maybe it will reveal patterns, maybe it might not. If it makes someone laugh, that to me is enough in itself. It’s good to laugh, especially in what is a sometimes very difficult world for children/ adults, parents/ friends… so if anyone is willing to share I am willing to receive stories privately, publicly, over the phone, email, any way you like and take it from there. Thanks for reading!

How about no?

Goodbye Pete

This should be in the parents section btw and writing such a wall of text makes most users stop reading

I'm not certain why this post deserved such antagonism?

Personally, I find the topic of 'autistic humor' fascinating, and worth discussing. We tend to have an oddball view of the world, which can be very funny at times. I too believe it's good to laugh at the craziness of it all!

Years ago I got into writing fanfic, and although I was trying to write serious stories at first, they ended up so hilariously stupid that I quickly accepted that humor writing was my niche. And there was often the theme of the characters not seeing the full picture of their situation clearly, and making ridiculous decisions based on faulty half-information. (Basically, the story of my life!)

I'm so glad to hear the boy you're working with is doing so much better. Keep up the great work!

Yeah, I'm not sure why StarFoxx was so offended. Humor is an interesting topic, especially in how it relates to autism (and other disabilities). I've noticed there's this attitude that we can't joke about disability because it will offend people. As an autistic person, I highly disagree. I joke about myself all the time. As long as it's not at the expense of someone, it's fine. It's better than self-pity or permanent depression (which I also joke about). Things that we can't joke about quickly become things we can't talk about at all.

I'm going through a pretty bad episode of seasonal depression right now, and YouTubers like Jacksepticeye and Markiplier who specialize in comedy have helped me avoid a feeling of complete isolation. When I can laugh out loud at something, it gives me energy. It also relieves tension in a much less destructive way than a meltdown, or at least gets me out of a bad frame of mind long enough to think more logically.

Sorry that this isn't really a story and more of a ramble. When I can think of a specific anecdote I'll let you know.

I really like puns... even those jokes that most people drop when they reach high school (example: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He'd gone bananas). I don't know if this is a universal ASD thing but word means tend to be interesting for us.

Thanks for replies. I don't mind what form they take, even if it is go away. There is part of me that feels like a journalist who is sticking a microphone in a soldiers face after a conflict:

"So how did the battle go, son? How was the killing, did you find it brought up emotions for you?"

But, in the UK, autism is rising at a huge rate - and it can't just be a rise in the ability to diagnose. There is little understanding by neurotypicals. When I tell neurotypical people stories of my experiences working with a boy with autism, yes perhaps firstly they hear the humor, but humor is a great ice breaker, then they hear of the wonders of a mind trapped in a world that can't hear him, and the breakthroughs that occur. Prejudice is mainly based on ignorance, this is not unique to autism, but it is in my opinion, something that will be encountered. By all means educate me!!

I'm 68, aspie, and only found out about it at 56. It's been a long, strange trip, but getting a good laugh is one of the few things that let me feel connected and safe around other people. Around age 50, the best available self-help group where I lived was an open Al-anon meeting with a few others from various dysfunctional families. The first time I'd gone to that group, the suggested topic was sex, but we got through OK. A couple of years later, after faithful weekly attendance, it came up again. By then, it was a smaller group, so familiar that most of us skipped the traditional introduction, but a few old timers still always started off with "Hello, I'm Alpha, and I'm from an alcoholic family" or something similar. I was unusually nervous the week before the meeting, but I realized that I had a perfect setup. Everyone else would be nervous, too, and our speaking turns were in order around the room. The "talking stick" was a stack of books we might want to refer to. My turn came, and I pretended to look through the literature, casually saying "Hi, I'm Bob, and I'm wearing plain white briefs." Bounced 'em off 3 mental walls with six words, and got the best laugh ever.

Another winner was on a school bus, bouncing violently along a logging road to make up time on a tour of off-grid housing. After almost hitting the ceiling from a back seat, I called out plaintively "Are we off the grid yet?" A bit later, someone called an inaugural meeting for anyone interested in electric cars. The venue was a craft brewery, and about 40 various bearded and hand-made wool-clad people crammed in, standing. After some time, we broke into 4 discussion groups to brainstorm on how we hoped the group would evolve. After some minutes, I cut off everyone and shouted over the din "Matching Silk Jackets!" The vision of such a transformation got another big laugh.

In my 20s, I worked in appliance repair, and had done a little job for a group of good friends who were keen on Eastern spiritual things. Standing around after, I was getting bored with the usual chatter, and interrupted with "Hey, did I ever show you my 3rd eye detector?" Instant attention. I pulled out a circuit tester from my belt pouch, which was a small flashlight that would light up if a pointed probe completed a circuit with the alligator clip on the end of a wire. I clipped the wire to my wire-frame glasses near one ear, and then slowly drew the probe tip down my forehead from the hair line. I kept my hand low, so everyone could see clearly. Also so that when the tip got to the middle of my forehead, the side of the probe hit the bridge of my glasses, lighting the bulb. Instant sensation! They spent about a minute clipping the wire to their ears and stabbing themselves in the forehead before I explained the trick. They were able to contain their glee better than I.

There may be an aspie brain behind a lot of compulsive comedians and crying clowns. The world really is mostly absurd, but it is impolite to point it out most of the time, unless it can be included in a joke. I was amazed to learn recently that a laugh always translates to "This alarming situation is not dangerous (to me, now.)" We need an unsuppressable signal to tell others that an attack should be called off when not necessary - there's been a misunderstanding in our large, complex heads.

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Humour kept me in good order all my life. It masked my autism for decades. It fitted me into work, school, all sorts of areas, occasionally got me in trouble because the occasion was wrong, but "We all make mistakes sometimes" as the short sighted Dalek said after asking a dustbin for a date.

For some of us, Autism means spotting patterns, or connections which others don't and that is an incredibly rich source for humour.

I don't think autism rates are rising by the way, professionals are now much more aware of the traits and it is being spotted where 45 years ago it wasn't. When I was taken to the shrink age 6, there was no definite conclusion offered, 10 years ago the conclusion offered would probably by "Aspergers", today " Autism Spectrum"

I am an autistic schoolboy. I managed to progress from severe autism to more moderate autism, but certainly no interactive chatterbox by any stretch. Except textually on a forum like this. I have been told I have a good attitude and sense of humour regarding my autism. But I'm not really sure how to share antidotes.

I find humour in my autism through Sgt. Schultz. He's my spirit character. The fictional character that I'm the most like. I also find it through Sid from Flushed Away.

Really. For most of my life, AS just wasn't an available diagnosis. Our only hope was to avoid a misdiagnosis. I remember one interview where I saw the guy starting to make up his mind, so I changed my personality to confuse him and avoid getting drugged. No professional wants to discover a condition they can't "cure," and the drug companies would have had us in the DSM decades earlier if there had been an expensive pill that they could pretend worked.

This is a very touchy subject for some people. Many people on the spectrum were bullied in school. Children and adults laughed AT me and my social blunders. I did not think it was funny. I was confused, frustrated and overwhelmed. Why was it acceptable to laugh at my disability but not laugh when a kid with CP falls over? I never understood jokes as a child and when people were laughing I feared I was the but of someone's joke (because it happened frequently). I would be afraid any book about Autism and humor would be full of stories caregivers found funny.

Laughing is, at least, a signal that a physical attack is not being considered, even if people are feeling spooked. With a reputation as a joker, I got away with quite a few quirks being mistaken for failed humour. I don't think it is easy to learn from instructions, unfortunately, but if you can see yourself as others see you, sometimes you can exaggerate that behaviour and laugh with them, which just makes your normal behaviour a boring performance by comparison, not worth watching or reacting to. There was even a successful comedian capitalizing on his low IQ perspective.

Here's some humor for you: When my sister asked me if I had Asperger's, I thought she said "ass burgers". I was picturing in my head a pair of butt cheeks between two hamburger buns.

I like to have a sense of humour about my autism. It's a lot better than stewing around in a cynical state. I choose to live my life to the fullest, laughing and having fun all the way. I like to see the world as a colourful place. Life is too short to be serious.