Parents ever threaten to call police/hospital for meltdown?

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LoneLoyalWolf
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22 Jun 2018, 1:22 pm

^That is just pure mental abuse, unacceptable behavior and your mother should be ashamed of herself. Telling your child you think you brought the wrong child home, making him feel like he is unwanted, telling him after your death he might need to be euthanized, is lazy when he is doing his best, has severe problems. It shows a lack of empathy, and she is an outright mentally abusive person, making the situation worse and worse. Where there needs to be support, she shows disrespect and attitude, even threatening behavior.

I myself had only a mother but thank god she always accepted me the way I was and she might not have the most empathic ability and I can't talk to her about much but she always has my back when I need it and that's the way it should be. Wished you had the same and am very sorry you had to deal with this.

People don't know what impact words have, mental abuse is so intense. Those scars always stay with you, in every situation of weakness they haunt you. How a mother can do something like that, is beyond me.

Do know you did nothing wrong and are not a failure whatsoever because people like us doubt ourselves. She is the failure and she knows it and mirrors onto you, that is what these people do.


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nick007
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22 Jun 2018, 1:44 pm

Thanx for the support LoneLoyalWolf :) I think some of it is that things looked different from her perspective. She couldn't grasp my side of things & I could NOT grasp hers. Some of the stuff was probably said out of frustration(like I did when I cursed em out) & she may of been making some bad jokes & saying things she didn't really mean. She has also done a lot for me that most parents wouldn't do for their kids or not do at my age. I'll admit I could of done more to be independent & done more around the house to help out but I think being in that environment kind of made it hard to learn. I probably have Learned Helplessness from the sh!t I went through. I am alot more independent since I moved in with my girlfriend. I'm sure there's other ways I could be even more independent but not quit sure how to go about learning things till situations come up. I only see my parents about 3x a year now. I go down to visit them 2wice a year; 1ce with Cass & 1ce by myself & when I'm by myself I help mom do a major house cleaning. She pays me some for it & the money helps cover both my trips down. My parents also come up here about 1ce a year. We get along OK in small doses for a short time but I have to have thick skin not to be bothered by some of mom's little comments. Cass is more sensitive & gets bothered by things my parents say to me or say about me(for example they say to her "How do you put up with him" & she's thinking "I love him" but won't say that of coarse). I'm a different person not being in that environment & I think our personalities were kind of a bad match & we clashed alot.


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Kiriae
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22 Jun 2018, 2:32 pm

Not only threaten but actually did.

They called an ambulance once (and police came too, because mom said the patient has Asperger and is currently out of control :evil:) but I calmed down by the time they got here so they had no much to do. They checked my pressure, asked me if I want to go to hospital and thats all. It took a long while till I was able to regain my trust towards mom and home didn't feel like home for me for a few following weeks - I didn't feel safe so I acted like I do in school etc. It was tiring. No place to relax and be yourself.

The other time mom took me to a hospital (ER), for the same reason(this one was just crying/self destructive/suicidal meltdown). That time I couldn't calm down till I talked with the doctor. It actually turned out well though - thanks to the intervention I got on meds and received disability pension, thanks to which I have my life in order now. My dad also got his police control back then, due to supposed family abuse (the meltdown started because dad was abusive towards me and the doctor reported it). According to mom it helped a lot but I couldn't see it - he was still abusive towards me so I decided to move out.



LoneLoyalWolf
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22 Jun 2018, 3:45 pm

^Sorry to hear that sweetheart. Rough times. Those things have quite an impact. Glad it turned out okay in the end and you now have your life in order.


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