I don't want to date but I get jealous of couples

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diablo
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22 Jan 2017, 4:46 pm

I'm not boyfriend material and women I come across tend to feel the same. Not bitter about it, (at least not anymore) because I'm unorthodox and antisocial and unambitious so its not like anyone else but me is to blame. And relationships appear to be more work than I'm willing to put in.

But even though I thought I transcended to where being independent made me contempt, a couple I know that recently started dating and their PDA stung a bit. So I feel like there is a part of me that still wants a partner.


I feel like the only way I can be happy and satisfied is to get rid of desiring a relationship and going solo in life.

Does anyone else feel similar?


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Luhluhluh
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23 Jan 2017, 7:24 pm

There's nothing out of the ordinary of wanting some company from time to time.

A lot of relationships, as they wear on, become more companionable. They're not necessarily attached at the hip all the time, and they're not all lovey dovey, but there's always someone there to talk to if you want it. Or someone to just sit quietly with while you each do your own thing.

Maybe that's what you're looking for?


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diablo
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24 Jan 2017, 2:01 am

Luhluhluh wrote:
There's nothing out of the ordinary of wanting some company from time to time.

A lot of relationships, as they wear on, become more companionable. They're not necessarily attached at the hip all the time, and they're not all lovey dovey, but there's always someone there to talk to if you want it. Or someone to just sit quietly with while you each do your own thing.

Maybe that's what you're looking for?


Thanks for replying. Actually its the lovey dovey crap I feel I'm missing out on. Relationship stuff a friend couldn't offer. And also companionship. Coming off cold and have a resting b-face was always been working against me in the whole warmth and friendliness category. And that's just scratching the surface of my weird issues. lol


How do people get the mentality where they don't need a romantic partner to feel happy and content? I can't decide if they get that from some inner peace. If experience taught them or if they just became jaded over time and figured out how to be self reliant with their own happiness.
Aside from you know, the bitter ones that fake being alright but harbor resentment to the whole dating scene or the opposite sex. A lot of mgtow for example.


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whatamievendoing
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24 Jan 2017, 4:13 am

diablo wrote:
How do people get the mentality where they don't need a romantic partner to feel happy and content?


If I had to guess, there may be a metric ton of possible scenarios leading to that. To me personally, that happened around the time I met my best friend. I love that guy - so much, in fact, that I even put him before any romantic partner(s) I may or may not have in the future. Our relationship may not be romantic, but it's close enough to what I consider an ideal romantic relationship, only with the obvious exclusion of the romance factor.

(So as to avoid misinterpretations, I'm not homosexual - I was only describing our relationship in comparison to the ideal romantic relationship I'd have with a woman.)


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diablo
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24 Jan 2017, 5:43 pm

whatamievendoing wrote:
diablo wrote:
How do people get the mentality where they don't need a romantic partner to feel happy and content?


If I had to guess, there may be a metric ton of possible scenarios leading to that. To me personally, that happened around the time I met my best friend. I love that guy - so much, in fact, that I even put him before any romantic partner(s) I may or may not have in the future. Our relationship may not be romantic, but it's close enough to what I consider an ideal romantic relationship, only with the obvious exclusion of the romance factor.

(So as to avoid misinterpretations, I'm not homosexual - I was only describing our relationship in comparison to the ideal romantic relationship I'd have with a woman.)


Is that what you'd call a bromance? :wink:

Never had a friend like that before, sounds interesting tbh.


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whatamievendoing
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25 Jan 2017, 1:41 am

diablo wrote:
whatamievendoing wrote:
diablo wrote:
How do people get the mentality where they don't need a romantic partner to feel happy and content?


If I had to guess, there may be a metric ton of possible scenarios leading to that. To me personally, that happened around the time I met my best friend. I love that guy - so much, in fact, that I even put him before any romantic partner(s) I may or may not have in the future. Our relationship may not be romantic, but it's close enough to what I consider an ideal romantic relationship, only with the obvious exclusion of the romance factor.

(So as to avoid misinterpretations, I'm not homosexual - I was only describing our relationship in comparison to the ideal romantic relationship I'd have with a woman.)


Is that what you'd call a bromance? :wink:


It might be. :P


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