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LonelyRabbit
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05 Feb 2017, 5:57 pm

I don't have any confidence in myself physically or emotionally.

I'm really starting to get sick of it, but I just don't know how to gain confidence!

I've had issues with my weight, my hair, and even my nose. I'm not happy with them and it drives me crazy! oh, and now I'm suffering from acne :/

I'm not confident emotionally, like I'm easily influenced, change my mind on beliefs, and completely avoid debating/arguing because I don't stand a chance.

Also, my art suffers, because I don't think I'm good enough and I just want to quit sometimes.

I try to motivate myself and give myself a compliment each day, but it's so hard to believe it.

How does someone get confidence??



hurtloam
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05 Feb 2017, 6:11 pm

I think confidence is only gained over time. The more art you'll do, the more you'll get better at it. Not every piece you do will be good, but that's what practice is about. Trying, failing and learning from the failure so that you can do better next time.

If I feel bad about my appearance I look at classic art and realise that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Marine Antoinette was meant to be very beautiful, but by today's perception those paintings of her make her look like nothing special. Yet she was at the time.

Every one is beautiful to someone.


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Chronos
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05 Feb 2017, 9:34 pm

LonelyRabbit wrote:
I don't have any confidence in myself physically or emotionally.

I'm really starting to get sick of it, but I just don't know how to gain confidence!

I've had issues with my weight, my hair, and even my nose. I'm not happy with them and it drives me crazy! oh, and now I'm suffering from acne :/

I'm not confident emotionally, like I'm easily influenced, change my mind on beliefs, and completely avoid debating/arguing because I don't stand a chance.

Also, my art suffers, because I don't think I'm good enough and I just want to quit sometimes.

I try to motivate myself and give myself a compliment each day, but it's so hard to believe it.

How does someone get confidence??


Here are some observations I've come by over the years.

1. If you like something, whether or not you are the creator of it, then chances are, someone else does too.
2. Artists are frequently unhappy with the art they create, and if they dislike their art, chances are, there is still someone who likes it.
3. Ugly people get dates.
4. People who avoid debates and arguments often do so, not because they don't have valid thoughts on the matter, but because they understand that the issue is actually too complex to debate on the spot.



Britte
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05 Feb 2017, 10:58 pm

I think it is one thing to give yourself compliments, and there's nothing wrong with that, in fact, it's good to notice your positive attributes, and feel good about them, however, confidence must come from inside ourselves, and for that to happen, it has to be built from within, I believe. In terms of myself, I seem to gain a bit more confidence, through healing from experiences that have taught me some type of important life-lesson. It can bring a level of self-empowerment, through the knowledge I acquire, the courage I encounter in myself, and the strength I might witness in myself, that I had no previous awareness of. All, of which contribute to my sense of self-worth and various internal strengths and abilities. You had mentioned being easily swayed. I have had a propensity of the same nature, where by, I could easily lose my own perspective, to someone elses. I have been noticing an evolution taking place, in my ability to hold my own perspective, while, also considering the perspectives of others, and likewise, I have had less difficulty speaking up for myself and my desires, and expressing my views and opinions, without being overly self-aware or as concerned about others opinions of me.



crystaltermination
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07 Feb 2017, 2:15 pm

I think confidence grows over time, but if one's depressed or has severe anxiety: it's all going to hinder that development. I think complimenting yourself everyday sounds like a very good step, according to my old therapist that would be helping build 'positive neural pathways'. Take each day at a time and go easy on yourself; challenge self-inflicted negative thoughts when they appear. I do this a lot and have done for years, sort of see the thoughts themselves as a side effect of past problems, 'confronting' them so to speak, does help.


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shortfatbalduglyman
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29 Mar 2017, 9:21 pm

I don't have any confidence in myself physically or emotionally.

I'm really starting to get sick of it, but I just don't know how to gain confidence!

I've had issues with my weight, my hair, and even my nose. I'm not happy with them and it drives me crazy! oh, and now I'm suffering from acne :/

I'm not confident emotionally, like I'm easily influenced, change my mind on beliefs, and completely avoid debating/arguing because I don't stand a chance.

Also, my art suffers, because I don't think I'm good enough and I just want to quit sometimes.

I try to motivate myself and give myself a compliment each day, but it's so hard to believe it.

How does someone get confidence??

quite frankly, in that description, i am just like you. except that i do not particularly care about hair, and i do not work on art.

what i have noticed, though, is that, for precious little "most people",

8) confidence does not have to be proportional to competence. :mrgreen:

in other words, they can act like they know everything and they are absolutely important. when they turn out factually incorrect, or whatever, they do not have to even apologize, much less make up for it.

read books about confidence.

interact more with precious little "people" that treat you like you want to be treated.

or just come up with a hobby or diversion. an activity you like to do or you are good at doing. or just something addictive. and that activity will help you obsess less over confidence.



ltcvnzl
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29 Mar 2017, 10:16 pm

I struggle with the same :( My lack of confidence goes fro my appearance to my work/studies and it's present in every single aspect of my life, in way it really disturbs me from being a productive person. It's awful.

I sometimes see people who is way below average but have a great confidence and they get a lot of good things because they trust in themselves and aren't afraid to produce something and show to the world and I really envy them, I wish I had that courage.