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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 8:47 am

I had to fire my tutor yesterday. It wasn't working out and she was getting kinda political. She's supposedly coming back today to pick up a book she loaned me, and I'm making myself sick thinking about it. I wish I could just mail her the book back but she is one of those people who won't listen to someone with a differing opinion. She called me stupid but is denying it. She DID. I think she is going senile and loosing her memory. She DID apologize for her outburst. She also basically insulted my religion and called my mother a "fundamentalist". She didn't apologize for that.


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SaveFerris
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09 Feb 2017, 9:08 am

MagicMeerkat wrote:
I had to fire my tutor yesterday. It wasn't working out and she was getting kinda political. She's supposedly coming back today to pick up a book she loaned me, and I'm making myself sick thinking about it. I wish I could just mail her the book back but she is one of those people who won't listen to someone with a differing opinion. She called me stupid but is denying it. She DID. I think she is going senile and loosing her memory. She DID apologize for her outburst. She also basically insulted my religion and called my mother a "fundamentalist". She didn't apologize for that.


Thats a difficult situation. Firstly I would not let her in the house unless you have someone with you , would give her the book on the doorstop and say "Some things are just not meant to be" , If she starts having a go at you I would politely say "Can I just stop you there" , then point behind her as if to warn her of something , when she looks , close the door and move on.


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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 9:20 am

SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:
I had to fire my tutor yesterday. It wasn't working out and she was getting kinda political. She's supposedly coming back today to pick up a book she loaned me, and I'm making myself sick thinking about it. I wish I could just mail her the book back but she is one of those people who won't listen to someone with a differing opinion. She called me stupid but is denying it. She DID. I think she is going senile and loosing her memory. She DID apologize for her outburst. She also basically insulted my religion and called my mother a "fundamentalist". She didn't apologize for that.


Thats a difficult situation. Firstly I would not let her in the house unless you have someone with you , would give her the book on the doorstop and say "Some things are just not meant to be" , If she starts having a go at you I would politely say "Can I just stop you there" , then point behind her as if to warn her of something , when she looks , close the door and move on.


I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


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SaveFerris
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09 Feb 2017, 9:31 am

MagicMeerkat wrote:

I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


Just throw the book at her from the 3rd floor then :lol: ( This is a joke :mrgreen: )

You could take headphones with you so if she starts , you can just drown her out as you walk away. Depending on how strongly you feel about the situation you should maybe report her to relevant education authorities as she clearly seems ignorant when it comes to religion.


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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 9:35 am

SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:

I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


Just throw the book at her from the 3rd floor then :lol: ( This is a joke :mrgreen: )

You could take headphones with you so if she starts , you can just drown her out as you walk away. Depending on how strongly you feel about the situation you should maybe report her to relevant education authorities as she clearly seems ignorant when it comes to religion.


What if she chases after me? I really doubt she would but you never know. Honestly, I think it would be hilarious to see her try to chase me up the stairs.


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SaveFerris
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09 Feb 2017, 9:44 am

MagicMeerkat wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:

I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


Just throw the book at her from the 3rd floor then :lol: ( This is a joke :mrgreen: )

You could take headphones with you so if she starts , you can just drown her out as you walk away. Depending on how strongly you feel about the situation you should maybe report her to relevant education authorities as she clearly seems ignorant when it comes to religion.


What if she chases after me? I really doubt she would but you never know. Honestly, I think it would be hilarious to see her try to chase me up the stairs.


You have to promise me that if she chases after you , you video it and post it here so would can all have a good laugh.

To be honest it sounds like your letting your anxiety wind you up by going through all the worst case scenario's in your head. I'm sure it will be fine but if you're that worried - have you got anyone to do it for you or be there with you.


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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 10:38 am

SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:

I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


Just throw the book at her from the 3rd floor then :lol: ( This is a joke :mrgreen: )

You could take headphones with you so if she starts , you can just drown her out as you walk away. Depending on how strongly you feel about the situation you should maybe report her to relevant education authorities as she clearly seems ignorant when it comes to religion.


What if she chases after me? I really doubt she would but you never know. Honestly, I think it would be hilarious to see her try to chase me up the stairs.


You have to promise me that if she chases after you , you video it and post it here so would can all have a good laugh.

To be honest it sounds like your letting your anxiety wind you up by going through all the worst case scenario's in your head. I'm sure it will be fine but if you're that worried - have you got anyone to do it for you or be there with you.


LOL! I'd set it to this music:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg


I do have PTSD so I do project "what if's"...even if they are unrealistic. No, it's just me.


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SaveFerris
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09 Feb 2017, 12:01 pm

MagicMeerkat wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:

I think she wants to meet on the porch of my apartment. I live on the third floor and she is disabled. I could just run back upstairs.


Just throw the book at her from the 3rd floor then :lol: ( This is a joke :mrgreen: )

You could take headphones with you so if she starts , you can just drown her out as you walk away. Depending on how strongly you feel about the situation you should maybe report her to relevant education authorities as she clearly seems ignorant when it comes to religion.


What if she chases after me? I really doubt she would but you never know. Honestly, I think it would be hilarious to see her try to chase me up the stairs.


You have to promise me that if she chases after you , you video it and post it here so would can all have a good laugh.

To be honest it sounds like your letting your anxiety wind you up by going through all the worst case scenario's in your head. I'm sure it will be fine but if you're that worried - have you got anyone to do it for you or be there with you.


LOL! I'd set it to this music:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg


I do have PTSD so I do project "what if's"...even if they are unrealistic. No, it's just me.


Benny Hill would be perfect :lol:

Yeah I do the same , I am for ever catastrophizing about situations and they are never as bad as I imagine but I can't break the cycle ( in me I believe it's partly PTSD and some OCD thinking chucked in for good measure ). I am no psychic but I think everything will be fine , but it's always good to have an exit strategy in your head if you think things will be too stressful , get your running shoes on , it's not as if you have too see the woman again so don't feel bad about running away.


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League_Girl
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09 Feb 2017, 12:18 pm

Just shoot her an email or something and tell her you will be leaving her book on your door step and to come and get it. If you have her address, just mail it to her. Or if you have a friend and you know where she lives, have them go give it to her and they can leave it on her doorstep at her house. Or you can go give it to her and just leave it on her door step, whatever works.


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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 2:01 pm

I asked her if I could just mail it back and she said I could keep it.


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SocOfAutism
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09 Feb 2017, 2:04 pm

MagicMeerkat wrote:
I asked her if I could just mail it back and she said I could keep it.


Even better.

I tutored and taught English as a Second Language for many years. It's in no way okay for people to make personal comments about the clients. We had a lot of conservative Hindu and Muslim students. Most of us were non-religious Americans who really didn't understand faith or different cultures. You just have to be polite and keep your mouth shut about stuff that's different. That's your client and all you're supposed to do is help them learn their specific lessons.



MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 2:37 pm

SocOfAutism wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:
I asked her if I could just mail it back and she said I could keep it.


Even better.

I tutored and taught English as a Second Language for many years. It's in no way okay for people to make personal comments about the clients. We had a lot of conservative Hindu and Muslim students. Most of us were non-religious Americans who really didn't understand faith or different cultures. You just have to be polite and keep your mouth shut about stuff that's different. That's your client and all you're supposed to do is help them learn their specific lessons.


She also flipped out when I told her I didn't want to go to this 22+ high school program she told me about but wanted to finish the credits from when I was home-schooled. She told me that the required Bible study credits were ridiculous, AFTER telling me that in college you sometimes have to take irrelevant courses. Maybe I might actually want to be a missionary in addition to being a veterinarian? Oh, yeah, she also wanted me to take a semester at this veterinary technician program that is two hours away from where I live. I told her it would be impossible to do that everyday and that I would have to move in order to do so. She said I should speak to my case manager about getting section eight and actually moving. What? Just to go there for a semester? I volunteer at an animal hospital and one of the "technicians" has never stepped foot into a veterinary technician program. Legally, he's what you would call a "veterinary assistant", but he does everything a technician would do. I've known other "vet techs" who got their training that way too. People always told me I should be a a veterinary technician because they thought my dyscalculia (undiagnosed at the time) would prevent me from meeting the math requirements in college. That's what the tutor in question was hired to do and she REALLY helped. Mostly because she was able to use my special interests to get the "gears" in my head going and she didn't have a temper tantrum when I got something wrong that I supposedly should "know". She also didn't have the "you can't use a calculator all the time" stick up her butt like most people who tried to teach me math and let me use it whenever I wanted. Eventually, I was able to do some math in my head. But this woman started taking out her frustrations on me. Anyhow, it's not like she was the only tutor in the world and now that I'm in the city, I can seek out others. I am considering the 22+ program she suggested. I don't like to be forced into ANYTHING. I like to have the option to investigate first. I talked to them on the phone and supposedly they have tutors and it's all free, but there's got to be some kind of catch. When something is too good to be true, it usually is. I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet. But I think a lot of stress in my life might disappear with this woman being gone. If she would have just focused on teaching me math instead of trying to me my parental figure. Anyhow, I asked my vet boss if vet school was impossible and he said no. His wife (she's a vet too) said it was challenging but not impossible and more organic chemistry than math.


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The Unleasher
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09 Feb 2017, 4:13 pm

Magic, that sounds rough. Whether you view the classes as worthless or not is up to you. I can certainly tell you my mother never needed algebra and she never took it either (it was optional in the 80's at her school). I might need it, just like you might need the classes you are taking, but I may not.


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League_Girl
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09 Feb 2017, 4:28 pm

MagicMeerkat wrote:
I asked her if I could just mail it back and she said I could keep it.



Good, you have nothing to worry about. You didn't steal it, she gave it to you.


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MagicMeerkat
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09 Feb 2017, 6:21 pm

League_Girl wrote:
MagicMeerkat wrote:
I asked her if I could just mail it back and she said I could keep it.



Good, you have nothing to worry about. You didn't steal it, she gave it to you.


It's a useful informative book too. If she does ask for it back, I can always mail it to her. I think she might be loosing her memory because she claims she never said the stuff she did, but she DID.


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League_Girl
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09 Feb 2017, 7:02 pm

Even if she might be developing dementia, you still have a right to a safe environment and it's good you are giving her the benefit of the doubt knowing she might not be intentionally gaslighting you. I assume she must be an elderly.


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