How do you make an effort to practice social skills?

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K_Kelly
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26 Feb 2017, 3:52 pm

I have always wanted to improve my social skills for some time. I can't make an effort to read peoples nonverbal communication, I struggle with it even coming into mind when I have a conversation with a person. I guess not having your own personal transportation makes it harder to be more social and outgoing. But where should I begin?



League_Girl
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26 Feb 2017, 4:27 pm

K_Kelly wrote:
I have always wanted to improve my social skills for some time. I can't make an effort to read peoples nonverbal communication, I struggle with it even coming into mind when I have a conversation with a person. I guess not having your own personal transportation makes it harder to be more social and outgoing. But where should I begin?



I would start out with learning the names of gestures people use and look those gestures up online and it will tell you why people use them and then the next step is when you see someone use that gesture again, you then remember the definition of that gesture and the reasons why people do it and that should help you figure out what that person could be doing and what they were thinking or what was going on in their mind.

My mother is better at all this stuff than me she can describe facial expressions in detail and I wouldn't be able to describe it.


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I have a quilt of labels. I had a language disorder and a speech disorder. Then communication disorder NOS. My other diagnoses have been Language Processing disorder, dyspraxia, SPD, OCD, ADD, Asperger’s, anxiety disorder, adjustment disorder, anorexia nervosa. My mom’s labels of me are: eating disorder, anorexia, social anxiety, PTSD, just being sensitive and having the victim complex when I was a kid. And of course she says I’m normal and says the only thing I had as a child was language. Huh? I must have been a shitty person then and maybe a difficult child I was who had to be labeled because of incompetent school staff and mean kids who didn’t accept differences and because I was trying to be “normal.” :/

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K_Kelly
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26 Feb 2017, 4:34 pm

I have read the website guide for Daniel Wendler's "Improve Your Social Skills" which I found linked on this forum a long time ago. I think he does a pretty good job explaining everything, and he explains that it's difficult to memorize all the different gestures and instead grouped them into two categories.



Dear_one
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26 Feb 2017, 4:42 pm

You don't meet people in a car, although you can get to meetings. Begging for rides is good social practice if you tire of cycling, cabs, or busses. Why not try walking around? The exercise is good anyway, and you can practice the basics of being friendly. Say a few extra words to store clerks, or think of nice things to say to your neighbors when you meet them. Try a park for people with nothing better to do than talk to you. Ask enough questions to make sure you don't talk more than half the time. Watch out for some who want to do all the talking, though.



BettaPonic
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26 Feb 2017, 6:12 pm

I go to DnD club. It is pretty relaxed there. I can make darker jokes and not worry about crossing the line.



K_Kelly
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26 Feb 2017, 6:52 pm

I'm not into DnD or any games like that.



BettaPonic
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26 Feb 2017, 7:09 pm

K_Kelly wrote:
I'm not into DnD or any games like that.


You should look for a group you would like to join. DnD seems to work for me because I am pretty sure I am not the only special needs or autistic person there.