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Joe90
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09 May 2017, 3:53 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Hope your not going to Drayton Manor http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39862996


No, we're not going there. The one we're going to has a good reputation and I've never known any deaths caused there.


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SaveFerris
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09 May 2017, 4:03 pm

Joe90 wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Hope your not going to Drayton Manor http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39862996


No, we're not going there. The one we're going to has a good reputation and I've never known any deaths caused there.


Read it on the news today and instantly thought of this thread.


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Kiriae
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09 May 2017, 4:49 pm

You won't die. And even if you do - so what? You won't be there anymore to see the consequences. :wink:

If I were you I would just go. It might be a bit irresponsible of me but I have a rule "If someone is letting you in his car for free - don't interfere with his driving style unless you see immediate danger".

Sure, speeding isn't very safe but I stay silent when it's just that. Probably because I am too scared to say anything. LOL
I calm my anxiety with "They drive like this so they probably have trust in their own abilities so I should trust in them too, noone wants to die after all". However I make sure to watch the road to yell "Watch out!" or "Brakes!" if an actual danger appears and I will comment "Red." if I see a red/orange light yet the driver doesn't seem to be slowing down(also yell "Red! RED! RED!" if we are really about to pass the crossing on red). And if I consider the speed way above what the road or weather lets for I won't hesitate to say "Slow down please". Unless the loud music doesn't let me.

Father of my friend tends to drive very fast and recklessly. I am always scared when I travel with him. But it's still way better than rely on the public transport. We literally wouldn't have a way back home from some places if not him because my parents don't care but he will take us home even at 1AM(long after any public transport stopped going), from a city 50kms from home. He will be there for us within 30 mins after our call and will drive me right next to my home. If he wouldn't come we would probably have to find a hotel.
His night drives are even more scary than day ones though. He not only drives fast but also falls asleep and there are times when the car goes off the lane. We need to keep talking to him to keep him awake (and sometimes say "Hey, don't sleep!") and I try to always be ready to grab the wheel or I hope my friend will do if things go bad. LOL

There were times I considered telling him I will drive instead (I have a driving license and he suggests it sometimes, probably as a joke) but I am even more scared driving by myself because I last drove 4 years ago, just for 2 weeks and I never drove during a night. Besides - I don't know that car and learning how to drive it when I am already having sensory overload after a whole day of socializing is not a good idea.
My friend also has a driving license and she knows that car but she has pretty much the same amount of driving experience as I do so she doesn't want to drive either. :ninja:

Anyway what I want to say - even if someone drives recklessly or is a bad driver (another example - my grandpa - he doesn't speed but he is totally clumsy and he can see only with 1 eye so his driving is ridiculous) it doesn't mean you will surely get into an accident and die. Unless the driver wants to kill you and is suicidal himself (or just just drunk) the chance of you getting there and back home safely is much bigger than the chance for an accident occurring. If situation gets dangerous the driver and the person sitting right next to him will use the most of their abilities to avoid or lessen the damage.


BTW: "Loud music and speed makes me nauseous" approach is really worth a try. Noone wants vomit in the car.



Joe90
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09 May 2017, 5:54 pm

I do have a fear of death. I know I won't know anything when dead, but it's still a worrying thought whilst alive. I don't want to be seriously injured either.

This is the first time I've worried about car crashes. There's no other alternative to getting to the theme park, as this boy is going to the theme park with us. I don't usually hang out with boys younger than me, but it's my brother's mate.

It's just that when my mum was young, before I was born, a good friend of her's got killed in a car crash, due to speeding and showing off - and this was the '80s. These days car accidents are even more common than ever.

I do genuinely get sick in cars, and on rides, but I'm prepared for that, as I have bought meds for motion sickness. I love the thrill of rollercoasters, and heights don't scare me. I'm only anxious when I feel there is danger. These rides at this particular theme park go every day, hundreds of times, and I've never heard of a horrific accident on these rides. I've been to this theme park before, some years ago.


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kraftiekortie
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09 May 2017, 5:58 pm

I would still go. But tell the guy not to "show off."

Maybe offer him a few quid for petrol, on condition that he drives safely.

If he doesn't drive safely, withhold the petrol money.

You really have to have fun in life. You can't live in fear all the time.



Joe90
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09 May 2017, 6:22 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I would still go. But tell the guy not to "show off."

Maybe offer him a few quid for petrol, on condition that he drives safely.

If he doesn't drive safely, withhold the petrol money.

You really have to have fun in life. You can't live in fear all the time.


That is true. While my anxiety can be a blessing, it can also be a curse. The good part of it is it makes me very hyperaware of danger, hence why I have never broken a bone in my body, and also I never cut myself when I was angry and depressed a few years back. But the bad part is I think too deeply, and end up worrying more than enjoying myself.

I think it's the way I hear of someone in the UK dying every week, as in an unexpected premature death, and as a pessimistic, I think "why shouldn't it happen to me?" I mean, I'm not invincible.
Sometimes I feel like going out in a suit of armour to protect me from any harm.


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Scorpius14
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09 May 2017, 7:30 pm

I'm guessin by your location you plan on going to Thorpe Park and would probably be around a 40 mile drive which will also probably take you onto the motorway the majority of the trip, in my experience of having my own brother take me to days out to places only about 5 miles who himself is quite a manic driver, a brother who doesn't really respect me made the situation a little more anxious for me, I dunno if he was trying to impress but he too was playing loud music every time we went out. I'd ask myself would I take public transport that would potentially cost over £100 and take 2 hours to get there?

First time was difficult though as i was given a text a week in advance but I straight up agreed to take the ride, where before he could drive, we had to rely on our dad to take us out. I on the other hand have not got my licence, vehicle nor ability to drive; not that i'd be a good driver (I play alot of driving games which may ultimately affect my driving in the real world and not treat real life like GTA).



SaveFerris
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09 May 2017, 10:23 pm

Scorpius14 wrote:
not that i'd be a good driver (I play alot of driving games which may ultimately affect my driving in the real world and not treat real life like GTA).


I'm not so sure that driving games put you at a disadvantage , in fact I think it can teach you the physics of driving & cars quite well.


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kraftiekortie
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10 May 2017, 9:07 am

In my opinion, while they might help, driving games don't put you in the "real world."

Driving in the "real world" is the only way you will really learn to drive.

I've always done poorly in driving games; I do all right driving on the actual road.



Joe90
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13 May 2017, 2:57 am

Just to let you know, I've been and gone to the theme park yesterday, with no car accidents! I'm still alive! :lol:

I must say I enjoyed the rollercoasters. They were intense; high, steep (as in vertical), and very fast. I had great fun...until I started to feel a bit dizzy and sick. I had took motion sickness pills, but I think I got too hungry. But then I didn't feel like eating. Bloody nausea always spoils everything. :(


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kraftiekortie
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13 May 2017, 7:27 am

I'm glad you allowed yourself to enjoy yourself, despite the anxiety. It mean you're really not "that bad" :wink: .



Joe90
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13 May 2017, 9:50 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm glad you allowed yourself to enjoy yourself, despite the anxiety. It mean you're really not "that bad" :wink: .


I know. I'm just a deep thinker. If I get a thought into my head, I keep worrying about it. Although I admit to it, I still can't help myself worrying. :)


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13 May 2017, 11:02 am

How many will ...

and my reading comprehension failed me. Advice after the fact isn't very useful.


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Last edited by Canadian Penguin on 13 May 2017, 12:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

SaveFerris
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13 May 2017, 11:59 am

Joe90 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm glad you allowed yourself to enjoy yourself, despite the anxiety. It mean you're really not "that bad" :wink: .


I know. I'm just a deep thinker. If I get a thought into my head, I keep worrying about it. Although I admit to it, I still can't help myself worrying. :)


The reality is never as bad as your anxiety predicts , next time tell your anxiety if none of it's predictions are correct your going to stop listening to it. Now if I could only follow my own advice things would be great :lol:


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