Why do I still hate my younger self?

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Why do I still hate my younger self? People tell me that I was just young and stupid, but the thing is, I did things that I would have known were wrong when I was even younger, like in grade school, so I don't think I could say I didn't know better because I did, I was just impulsive and selectively ignorant.

Don't we all hate our younger selfs in some way? Because we were more annoying,mean, and immature. I sure was. I remembered throwing temper tantrums multiple times a day with yelling at the top of my lungs. I even remember throwing chairs in the classroom. And in 3rd grade called the principal a b***h. You can say I was a bad child back then. And looking back. God I hate my younger self.

Your "younger" self was a "work in progress." You made mistakes. Hopefully, now, you own up to them.

To "hate" your younger self, to me, is a waste of time. It's history. It's in the past.

Think of your younger self as a building being built. Buildings are always ugly while they are being constructed.

Now, as you are older, the building looks more beautiful, and is more finished, and ready to serve a good purpose.

I hate my 4 and 5-year-old self, because I used to have tantrums at school. I remember once I couldn't sit still in story time, and the teacher who was trying to read the story asked one of the other kids to go and get the teacher's assistant to come and take me out. I didn't want to be taken out so I sat very still and hoped they would change their minds. But when the teacher's assistant came and stood me up, I screamed at the top of my lungs and tried to tackle her as she took me out to a quiet room for time out. I bet I made everybody's ears bleed.

I also hate my 13 and 14-year-old self. I did really stupid things, and I knew what I was doing at the time but I still went along with it. It might not have been so embarrassing if I done these things with some friends, but because I done them on my own, I looked like a weird loner or a stalker or something.

Oh God!

But you're past all that now.....

I did some stupid things as a kid, embarrassing things, made lots of mistakes.

Even in my 20's...and even beyond!

I was a "work in progress," just like you were a "work in progress."

the stupid things i did when i was younger bother me so much because it is hard to imagine the child who was there at that time was ME, because i know i would do much differently if i had the choice now.

he and i have very little in common, it's frustrating to think we are the same person.

maybe something similar is happening there.

You ARE the same person----but, as a child, you were developing. You were learning.

As you know, people aren't static beings. People are always evolving. One necessary component of evolution of this nature is "trial and error."

People, usually, have to make foolish mistakes when young in order to learn, in order for them not to make the same mistakes when they get older.

It's much better, in my opinion, when you look foolish at 15 than if you look foolish at 35.

I should know....I looked pretty bad when I was in my 40's.

Don't feel bad. I hate my past self too. I've made some mistakes so stupid that I'm surprised I didn't literally beat myself up over them back in the day. Luckily for myself, I'm not into self-harming.

I still slap myself around sometimes.....even to this day.

OK, I admit most of my old mistakes were due to caring too much about what others say. The person I was before my age was on the clock may not have been perfect, but I don't hate said person, because back then, I didn't care what others said, and I prized my intellect more as a kid than as a teenager. Like, I turned from walking encyclopedia/the walking embodiment of Quora to the walking embodiment of Yahoo! Answers seemingly overnight.

I had a housemate for a while, a few years ago. We worked at the same place, and enjoyed similar music. He needed a place on short notice, and I had a spare room. He was a couple of decades younger than I was, and like me at that age, did not make a very good housemate. I decided that did not mean I had to put up with his tomfoolery. I hated him a little, until I thought about it in that light. Hating oneself rarely makes a good way to spend one's time, and doesn't lead to good outcomes in my experience.

Was that roommate also autistic?

I guess that if in the past, I didn't care about what everyone else said, I'd have less regrets.

I don't think so. He seemed extremely socially fluent.

i know that, but it is just uncanny, to ME, when i realize i can have much more in common with a total stranger today than i did with MYSELF, just 10 years ago.

it's totally natural and unavoidable to evolve, yes. woe to those who don't. and IMO a feeling of unfamiliarity, sometimes morphing into contempt at your past "unevolved" self is natural too.

but may i just ask, why do you think it is better that a teenager embarrass himself, compared to a 35 year old? is the latter age group under more social pressure to have it "together" by that point?



if you were the walking embodiment of quora, does that mean you also were obsessed with tesla cars?

I wanna believe that stress was the main reason for my impulsive decisions, but is that just a flimsy excuse to save my ego?