plain milk vs. chocolate milk.

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Whether vanilla or choco, soya milk is superior.
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soy milk is much less thick than regular milk. and i like soy milk more.

never had coconut milk.

almond milk tastes good.

pretty paranoid about my weight.

obsessive compulsive disorder

and i get too obsessed over what i eat lately

nothing better to worry about

no school - finished flunking Structural Engineering

no work - plenty of jobs already fired my worthless corpse

precious lil "friends" dumped me

quite frankly do not see the point in doing jack

feel like the solar system has little or nothing left for me, positively

be aware that although it seems counterintuitive, that eating fat does not necessarily make one fat.

be aware that although it seems counterintuitive, that eating fat does not necessarily make one fat.
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according to the atkins diet, carbs make someone fat. fat does not make one fat.

in Nutrition class, in community college. watched a video where a nutritionist counterintuitively told a woman to eat more fat, and that would make the woman thinnner. the woman did, and it worked.

those are the claims.

however, it does not necessarily follow that eating more fat, in every situation (such as mine), makes someone thinner.

but whatever.

seriously. so what if i am chinese?

there are so few fat chinese people.

but i eat the slightest thing and gain weight.

the chinese people working at chinese restaurants. Panda Express. big deal. they are just as thin as the other chinese people.

seriously maybe i ain't chinese.

i am too gravitationally fat, and academically stupid to be chinese. however, i am socially awkward, vertically short, and uptight enough to be chinese.

but seriously though

sometimes i get so frustrated

i eat the slightest thing and feel totally bloated

wonder if there's something wrong with large and small intestines. or digestive system.

and i hardly ever get hungry either.

but when i start eating, feel like i almost can't stop. almost.

kind of hard to imagine anyone else feels like this

but whatever.

I read that chronic [untreated] systemic infections cause fat retention because the body tries to wall off the infections in fat. I was in that situation, and the only cure was to go adkins for a while, especially give up wheat/barley/rye/oats/sugar in all forms/potatoes/corn/most oils. coconut oil [in the form of pure coconut milk, in the can] and fish oil [omega 3 supplements and plenty of sea food] are the only exceptions. eventually the bloating/moonface/weight went back down, and the muscle mass went up. YMMV but this is generally doable. not easy, but doable. I have faith in your powers to do this.

I read that chronic [untreated] systemic infections cause fat retention because the body tries to wall off the infections in fat. I was in that situation, and the only cure was to go adkins for a while, especially give up wheat/barley/rye/oats/sugar in all forms/potatoes/corn/most oils. coconut oil [in the form of pure coconut milk, in the can] and fish oil [omega 3 supplements and plenty of sea food] are the only exceptions. eventually the bloating/moonface/weight went back down, and the muscle mass went up. YMMV but this is generally doable. not easy, but doable. I have faith in your powers to do this.
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i did not major in biology or anything related. so, something sophisticated like the article that you read, might sound like it makes sense. but i ain't got no framework of education, to correctly evaluate in what way it does or does not make sense.

having said that, numerous medical conditions cause weight gain, weight loss, exhaustion, anemia, clinical depression, anger, hatred, passive aggression, and hatred of all things human.

without a medical doctor telling me an official diagnosis, i can't just jump to one conclusion. although of course. i love to Google exotic diagnoses and imagine getting them.

but whatever

if a medical doctor orders me to go on Atkins, or if someone holds me under gunpoint and orders me to go on Atkins, or in some extreme situation where only food from Atkins is available, or if someone hires me for minimum wage to go on Atkins, then i go on Atkins.

but seriously though

every day, i eat at most 1 serving meat. usually chicken/pork/beef. usually whatever came in the dumplings.

and dairy. about half the days, one serving milk or yogurt.

cheese causes constipation. constipation already takes too long. 3 times a day for one hour each.

although love cheddar

usually eat nine serving fruit/veg total per day. seriously. five liter water a day.

meat tastes ok. once in a while

used to be vegetarian for moral reasons. but that was too socially awkward. having to constantly explain to precious lil "people". and my precious lil "mom" had the nerve to lie to me that something did not contain meat. and it was just too inconvenient

cost benefit analysis

sure it is more moral to be veg than omnivore, all things equal

but how much more moral

and at what cost

there is seriously something wrong with everything

in any event, i do eat meat. but about one serving a day. less than the Food Pyramid recommends.

and yes i feel guilty and ashamed for eating meat.

but you have to balance being idealistic with being practical

oh those poor defenseless veggies! [ ] anyways, the thickness of pure coconut milk is what turned me onto it, as it has even more of the yummy density of raw milk or cream, but in a more usefully nutritious [medium chain triglyerides] form. the body treats MCT like a carb, sort of. you can get fairly quick energy out of this form of fat.

oh those poor defenseless veggies! [ ] anyways, the thickness of pure coconut milk is what turned me onto it, as it has even more of the yummy density of raw milk or cream, but in a more usefully nutritious [medium chain triglyerides] form. the body treats MCT like a carb, sort of. you can get fairly quick energy out of this form of fat.
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what tastes like ice cream, without the fat. frozen banana.

but hey whatever

b/c i ain't the nutritional gatekeeper of the household.

pretty soon i have to panhandle for $$ to waste on whoppers, inari sushi, and et cetera.

but seriously though, i feel so exhausted. so often. and it has been going on for so long. that i seriously doubt the addition or subtraction of one food from ye ol' diet will have much of an effect.

although of course i ain't psychic. and i often say and do wrong things

but whatever

such is "life"

if you could call this a "life"

"life" is going nowhere.

if i am extremely careful and restrained, i eat:

2 serving fruit/veg
3 serving fruit/veg, 1 dessert
2 serving fruit/veg, 1 sushi rice, 1 inari tray
1 serving fruit, 1 serving meat, 1 serving bread
2 more serving of bread/dairy/fruit/veg

otherwise sometimes i gorge

although lately, i eat the slightest thing and feel bloated

I gave up bread first thing, it made a BIG difference. IMHO If you give up ALL bread, in a few weeks you will notice a difference. or my name ain't blabby.

no love for rice milk? (or " milk")

regular milk in more than token amounts tends to make me smelly. but cheese, for some reason, doesn't have that effect. rice milk is too watery for my taste. coconut milk is deliciously thick and creamy, which is why I drink it, aside from the MCT oil in it.

regular cow milk is in the sweet-spot for me, thickness/consistency wise but the taste is meh.

i like rice milk because it is runny and thin, must be my addiction to water. don't take to well to overly thick, creamy stuff.

everything else has to be thin as water except for my milk. to each their own.
also, everything I drink must be ICE cold. no warm drinks for me.

rice milk is pretty thin. pretty good. just relatively expensive. that's all. pretty soon i will end up homeless. especially, if nobody makes the mistake of hiring my worthless corpse. so, it would behoove me not to waste too much money on food.
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having said that, i have an addiction to whoppers. milk chocolate malt balls. peanut butter. chocolate. it's like a drug addiction. or something. it is out of control. it ain't financially expensive. but someone my age/sex/height/weight is only supposed to eat 25 grams of sugar per day. one kit kat has 21 grams already. if i cut out the candy, could lose some weight.
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I gave up bread first thing, it made a BIG difference. IMHO If you give up ALL bread, in a few weeks you will notice a difference. or my name ain't blabby.

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right now i do not eat much bread. lately been addicted to inari sushi. sounds healthy. sushi. but no. sushi rice contains vinegar and sugar, to make it stick together. the inari is tofu. but deep fried. and then wasabi. seriously.

usually do not eat a lot of bread. but Clif bars taste too sweet, all of a sudden. and inari sushi costs too much. maybe i have to start eating more bread, as part of the grain group of the Food Pyramid.

if there were a method of eating less bread while keeping symptoms and costs at a minimum, maybe i would be a bit receptive.

but, obsessive compulsive disorder

I rather have chocolate milk, I found HERSHEY'S SPECIAL DARK Cocoa on Amazon & no sugar.

^^^^