Opinions/Experiences of "Aspie Support Groups"?

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doofy
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23 Oct 2017, 2:11 pm

You know - some health professional or a proactive aspie sets up a group for aspies to get together. What are they like (the groups)?

I s'pose the theory is you are amongst "like minded people", but are you?

As the old saying goes: if you've met one aspie you've, er, met one aspie...

So what's a structured group like? Part of me thinks it might be interesting (not that I'm likely to have access cos of where I live), but most of me thinks: oh god - what if that person wants to talk at me about penguins for 20 minutes.

Any thoughts/experiences?



TheAP
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23 Oct 2017, 2:20 pm

Though I've enjoyed my experience with them for the most part, I can't say I really connected or related to the other people there. They generally had different interests from me and many were more outgoing, which made it hard for me to fit in.



TUAndrew
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24 Oct 2017, 6:53 am

I've been to a few, and that's not including my previous college and university groups.

As every aspie is different, the quality of aspie groups are very dependent on who's there. Some of them are filled with great like-minded people; whereas with other groups we didn't share any interests and we were too introverted to talk about anything else...making me wonder if that group of NTs laughing, having a good time at the other table would be a better place.

In short: certainly try going to them, but it's a roll of the dice as to how good it's going to be.



C2V
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24 Oct 2017, 7:42 am

Pointless.
I went to one which was more of an autism therapies group than a support group, but there was that element. They treated us like we were severely intellectually disabled, even though they knew from our neurological testing (we were a test subjects group) that many of us were of above average cognitive intelligence.
They went into patronizing things like teaching us how to order drinks for ourselves at cafes - I can do that even when I am completely nonverbal.
I was no more able to "connect" with the people there than anywhere else, and like everywhere else, they found me scary and off-putting. I watched as people in the group began to "clique," but was as outside it as always.
The other was a straight up adult autistics social group, run by neurotypical facilitators. All they proposed to do was go to different restaurants and eat. I'm misophonic. No thankyou.


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TUAndrew
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24 Oct 2017, 7:46 am

C2V wrote:
Pointless.
I went to one which was more of an autism therapies group than a support group, but there was that element. They treated us like we were severely intellectually disabled, even though they knew from our neurological testing (we were a test subjects group) that many of us were of above average cognitive intelligence.
They went into patronizing things like teaching us how to order drinks for ourselves at cafes - I can do that even when I am completely nonverbal.
I was no more able to "connect" with the people there than anywhere else, and like everywhere else, they found me scary and off-putting. I watched as people in the group began to "clique," but was as outside it as always.
The other was a straight up adult autistics social group, run by neurotypical facilitators. All they proposed to do was go to different restaurants and eat. I'm misophonic. No thankyou.


Eeew, it's those sort of places that make me paranoid about being patronised. The second club you mentioned sounds great IMO, just as long as autistic people also have the opportunity to be facilitators. Fortunately my regional autism authority/charity does that.



C2V
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24 Oct 2017, 7:55 am

TUAndrew wrote:
Eeew, it's those sort of places that make me paranoid about being patronised. The second club you mentioned sounds great IMO, just as long as autistic people also have the opportunity to be facilitators. Fortunately my regional autism authority/charity does that.

I guess the second one would have benefited people who can socialize. As in, freeform, just throw you in there and do the unstructured smalltalk thing and win people over with your dazzling personality. But I can't do that. If there's no focus, I can't function. If the sole purpose of being there is to socialize, just sit and socialize without any framework to hold onto, just people facing each other and ... what? It's impossible. I don't understand. Can't do it.
But yeah, if you're more functional than I am, something like that might actually be helpful! That was just my experience of it, not an overall condemnation of the idea for everyone. :)


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Esmerelda Weatherwax
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24 Oct 2017, 8:52 am

Thanks for this thread. I've been frustrated at the lack of *anything* for Aspie adults within a reasonable distance of my home. After reading through here I'm less frustrated, because I've already been to enough gatherings where it goes to "cliques" or people are patronized. (Churches, other disability support groups, book clubs...)

When I think about it, I spent more than 30 years in gatherings like that. It was called "my job". But at least I was paid to show up there :-)


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