Autistic people aren’t really accepted

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Esmerelda Weatherwax
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10 Nov 2017, 9:57 am

@xatrix: you can absolutely speak for me, because you got it exactly right :-). Re the issue of patronizing, and its range - I have an acute memory of attending a (white, suburban, well-off) church 15+ years ago, and listening politely to a family there, who were telling us about their summer trip to Central America. They loaded up the family van with useful stuff and did DIY charity work. I am sure they did help people, yet it felt to me as though they were performing, as though the kindness was meant for an audience - us, then, there. I couldn't help wondering why they didn't stay home and do inner city work - God knows the need was acute, and it was right on their doorstep. I kept quiet; there was no kind or positive way for me to ask that.

Some time later I stumbled across the concept of "impression management", and I think that's what I was seeing. I now believe much charity falls into that area, so I try to welcome any good results while steering clear of manipulation... and fundraising appeals.

@B19: I honestly enjoyed reading your comments as much as I enjoyed the original article.

@traven: I'm sure you didn't intend this, but: in reading your post I could not help wondering if you are a published poet? The way you expressed your thoughts had as strong an impact as the thoughts themselves.

Re the idea of an Aspie nation - I'd just be happy if we had an Aspie-welcoming culture...

Virtual hugs to anyone who would like one.


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"I believe you find life such a problem because you think there are the good people and the bad people," said the man. "You're wrong, of course. There are, always and only, the bad people, but some of them are on opposite sides."
-- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!


BTDT
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10 Nov 2017, 10:06 am

I think the happiest people on the spectrum are those that have managed to parlay their special talents into meaningful employment.



Meistersinger
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10 Nov 2017, 5:35 pm

BTDT wrote:
I think the happiest people on the spectrum are those that have managed to parlay their special talents into meaningful employment.


Boy, isn’t that the truth!

I attended the forever young group This past Wednesday at my church (their monthly meeting and luncheon (usually a potluck)). I was talking to one of the ladies in the church choir that if my parents, brothers would have been more supportive and understanding, I would have never bothered spending the last 30-odd years in IT and library science, and stayed in music full time. Instead, I kept hearing the old refrain, “Money isn’t everything: IT’S THE ONLY THING!”

When I worked at the Pentagon, my coworkers and I were called into our supervisors office for a discussion. This supervisor, who retired as a Major in the Army, got to discussing career goals. He took a look at me, and knowing I had a BA in Music History, asked me why was I here, and not performing either with a symphony or the National Opera. I replied “Because there is no money in it!” He comes back, “The hell with the money, just do what you love, the money will come later. I responded back, “You don’t have the student loan load that I have.” He still comes back, “The hell with the money, just do what you love, the money will come later.” This conversation continued like this for the next half hour. Finally, I replied, “I don’t know why I’m here, to tell you the truth.” He finally came back, “Then you should really go back to your first love, the money will come later.”

How I wish I would have followed his advice...