Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Competing for leader's attention

Page 1 of 1 [ 5 posts ] 

Previous topic | Next topic

ladyelaine
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 26 Apr 2016
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,164
Location: surrounded by cats

23 Jan 2018, 12:08 pm

People seem to love competing for the attention of leaders such as teachers, principals, and pastors. People at my church will have BS sessions with the pastor in the confessional. People will brag about how they had a 30 minute conversation with the pastor. Parents and teachers will try to kiss the principal's butt and be bffs with the principal. Students compete for the attention of their teachers and professors. People will compete for the attention of the most popular couple in a church or other social setting. Have any of you guys noticed this? What are your thoughts on it?



fifasy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Mar 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,264
Location: England

23 Jan 2018, 12:23 pm

I've noticed it. It makes social situations really challenging. I volunteered in thrift stores (for UK readers: charity shops) and the people who had volunteered longer expected me to be really deferential to them and whoever led the team, there was a way you were supposed to speak to them, and if you didn't follow it the other volunteers would start getting passive aggressive, and being rude and hard to work with. I seemed to alwqys upset the other volunteers because I talked to everyone as though we were equals and didn't understand or take part in the pyramid structure they had going with the in jokes and the catchphrases they used.



ladyelaine
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 26 Apr 2016
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,164
Location: surrounded by cats

23 Jan 2018, 1:00 pm

fifasy wrote:
I've noticed it. It makes social situations really challenging. I volunteered in thrift stores (for UK readers: charity shops) and the people who had volunteered longer expected me to be really deferential to them and whoever led the team, there was a way you were supposed to speak to them, and if you didn't follow it the other volunteers would start getting passive aggressive, and being rude and hard to work with. I seemed to alwqys upset the other volunteers because I talked to everyone as though we were equals and didn't understand or take part in the pyramid structure they had going with the in jokes and the catchphrases they used.


I hate that people have to be that way. Why can't people put aside the social nonsense and work together?



fifasy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Mar 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,264
Location: England

23 Jan 2018, 2:21 pm

ladyelaine wrote:
fifasy wrote:
I've noticed it. It makes social situations really challenging. I volunteered in thrift stores (for UK readers: charity shops) and the people who had volunteered longer expected me to be really deferential to them and whoever led the team, there was a way you were supposed to speak to them, and if you didn't follow it the other volunteers would start getting passive aggressive, and being rude and hard to work with. I seemed to alwqys upset the other volunteers because I talked to everyone as though we were equals and didn't understand or take part in the pyramid structure they had going with the in jokes and the catchphrases they used.


I hate that people have to be that way. Why can't people put aside the social nonsense and work together?


A lot of people seem to want to rule the world. They can never be liked by enough people, or have enough money, or social status. It is a constant competition.



ladyelaine
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 26 Apr 2016
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,164
Location: surrounded by cats

23 Jan 2018, 7:05 pm

fifasy wrote:
ladyelaine wrote:
fifasy wrote:
I've noticed it. It makes social situations really challenging. I volunteered in thrift stores (for UK readers: charity shops) and the people who had volunteered longer expected me to be really deferential to them and whoever led the team, there was a way you were supposed to speak to them, and if you didn't follow it the other volunteers would start getting passive aggressive, and being rude and hard to work with. I seemed to alwqys upset the other volunteers because I talked to everyone as though we were equals and didn't understand or take part in the pyramid structure they had going with the in jokes and the catchphrases they used.


I hate that people have to be that way. Why can't people put aside the social nonsense and work together?


A lot of people seem to want to rule the world. They can never be liked by enough people, or have enough money, or social status. It is a constant competition.


There is no satisfying some people.