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NewTime
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23 Mar 2018, 12:03 pm

People often confuse being asexual with being celibate. Someone who is celibate waits to get married before having sex whereas an asexual will no desire to have sex even when married.



nick007
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23 Mar 2018, 9:54 pm

NewTime wrote:
People often confuse being asexual with being celibate. Someone who is celibate waits to get married before having sex whereas an asexual will no desire to have sex even when married.
There's also demisexual in which people don't desire sex outside of a strong romantic connection. My sexuality is sort of around demi


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SaveFerris
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23 Mar 2018, 9:59 pm

celibacy can also mean abstaining from marriage


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CockneyRebel
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23 Mar 2018, 10:16 pm

I'm asexual or as I like to joke with my friends, peasexual.


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goldfish21
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23 Mar 2018, 11:04 pm

I had to do a google for the definition of celibate. I had no idea it also meant refraining from marriage. I thought it was just about abstaining from sex.

I wouldn't really know.. not having sex isn't my cup of tea. :)


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24 Mar 2018, 3:34 pm

I find it very annoying when people confuse the two. Celibacy is a choice. Being ace isn't any more of a choice than being straight or gay is. I find it even more annoying when they think that if a person doesn't feel sexual attraction then they must not feel any kind of love or emotions at all. Or when they say you just haven't found the right person yet. That's like saying a straight person hasn't found the right gay person yet, or vice versa.



lostonearth35
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25 Apr 2018, 4:53 pm

Thanks to the Toronto ramming incident, however, I know now that some people call themselves "incel", where they want a sexual relationship but can't, so they're full of hate and frustration. :(

I wonder if there's a name for people who are in a sexual relationship but don't want to be in one at all? Insex? :?
No, that sounds too much like "insects".



naturalplastic
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25 Apr 2018, 6:39 pm

NewTime wrote:
People often confuse being asexual with being celibate. Someone who is celibate waits to get married before having sex whereas an asexual will no desire to have sex even when married.


Not exactly.

Yes.

Celibacy is a lifestyle choice, were as asexuality is a condition that you are stuck with that is no more a choice than being hetero, or being gay is a choice.

That part is right.

But (as Merrian Webster says) "celibacy" means "abstaining from all sexual relations, and marriage. Typically for religious reasons."

...and marriage". No sex, no marriage. Married and celibate are mutually exclusive.

IF you become a priest or a nun or a monk and never have sex then that is celibacy. If you plan and hope to have a sexual relationship someday, even if its exclusively within marriage then you are not being "celibate".

Back in the day those were the only two options: sex within marriage, or religious vows of celibacy. It was assumed that you didn't have sex before marriage. Regular folks who waited until marriage and then had families were the opposite of the "celibate" minority who joined religious orders.

So you may ask "what do you call folks who save themselves until marriage, but are not lifelong celibates?".

The answer is that I don't know of any term for that. But for centuries that was just called "normal".

Keep in mind that folks often got married in the mid teens back in the day.