A lot has happened to me over these past couple days...

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Just like the title suggests, I have been through some crud in the past 4 days. Please read the story, I beg of you:

Day 1: I was in gym, and then there was an educational lockdown. Some boys I didn't know came over to talk to me, and at first I was happy to talk to them, but then they kept asking me to rate one of my (guy) friend's from one to ten based on looks(It made me start thinking of him, since I actually liked him a LOT). I had to lie so they'd get of my back, then I left them. I went over to play kick the football with that same friend and his other buddy, then my legs got tired, so I sat down. I thought that he would keep playing with his other friend, but he sat down next to me. Curiosity got the best of me, and I asked him, "Do you 'like like' me?" (I didn't want to say 'love', because I was already nervous). To my surprise, he said, "Yes, a lot," and he asked me back. I said, "Yes, some guys asked me to rate you, and I said a 6, but you're more like a 9, since I only know you a little bit," and after he heard that, he replied, "I rate you a 10. I love you,"
I just was in loveshock. He kept going on about how he would dream of him and I driving down a road with each other and laying under the stars with each other, alone. He was a very shy guy, but I didn't know he liked me that much. He told me that if anything happened to me, I could tell him and he would do something about it. I mean, I KNEW him, but he wasn't an everyday friend I hung around. After that, the teacher called us over, and said the lockdown lasted so long because someone found a weapon in the building. My eyes were opened very wide, and I had to go home, in my gym clothes, and I didn't get my stuff since it was in the locker room.

Day 2: Now, I already had a boyfriend, which I was with for well over a year, but I wasn't happy with him even before I found out about the other guy. He was super annoying, and kept bugging me about going to social events, and sometimes pressuring me into doing other stuff. I didn't have the courage to break up until the guy during the lockdown confessed his feelings. I went to school the next day and finally broke up with my old bf, but I said we could still be friends. He was so upset that he told everyone I knew I hated him. That hurt my feelings a lot, since I still wanted to be friends, just not bf/gf. He started to text me in the middle of the night that he couldn't handle the break-up. On social media, some of the people I knew started to tell me that I need to change my ways since I broke up with him, "Just to be with another guy," (which is partially true, since he treated me better) and I left the group.
During all of that social media bull, I was at the eye doctor, and the doctor said I needed glasses. I was at the eye doctor since my mother was told that I didn't pass an eye exam at school and a teacher noticed I had trouble looking at the whiteboard. My mother was upset that I 'ruined my eyes', and that only hurt me more.

Day 3: I had butterflies in my stomach the entire day, just thinking about the guy who told me he loved me. He was shy, so he didn't like eye contact or touching, IDK if he's autistic or not, I am but I learned social skills. He never looks people in the eye, but whenever he talks to me, he looks me in the eyes, and we decided to wait a couple of weeks to start dating. I started to draw pictures, daydream, and I wasn't paying attention in class. I usually paid attention in some of my classes, but I was daydreaming in ALL of my classes, and I didn't notice until someone pointed it out. I lost my appetite, I could barely drink fluids too, and I couldn't stop thinking about both of the guys. I decided to calm down by listening to music and laying on my bed.

Day 4: I'm trying not to think of him, and my appetite has improved. I don't want to look obsessive. I decided to make a goal that every morning, I was going to start taking better care of my hygine, not just brushing teeth, hair, and all the basics, but actually doing something with my hair, mouthwashing more often, lotioning, and other extras. I felt this to impress him, even though I know he likes me the way I am.


So, yeah, I have been through a lot, and I need help processing.