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2e4921
Emu Egg
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Joined: 26 Mar 2018
Gender: Male
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26 Mar 2018, 12:57 pm

Hello, I have issues with controlling my anger when something pisses me off. Usually I yell at the other person or I just hang up if I'm arguing on call. Doing this I've hurt my family and my girlfriend. I really don't like this. How do you manage your anger and your meltdowns?



Silas
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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Joined: 30 Sep 2010
Age: 50
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28 Mar 2018, 1:41 pm

My anger issues are related to my meltdowns.

They happened quite a bit when I was young, and don't happen much now, but they still happen.

I get frustrated easily and expect things to come easily to me. Small things annoy me quite a bit, and I don't like dealing with people at work.

I am pretty careful not to get angry with my wife, or yell at her, but I have certainly yelled at strangers, and even co-workers.

Afterwards, I am always embarrassed and feel terrible, but it is difficult to manage this stuff.



Rustifer
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 1 Mar 2018
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28 Mar 2018, 2:28 pm

Well it helped a lot realizing that my anger module is fine so I've not an anger problem, there's just more input going into the module than should be.

Try not to fall into the trap of thinking of it an an "anger problem". Seeing it as an "input sensitivity issue" is a better objective way of looking at it and helps to avoid the guilt spiral associated with feeling like a morally bad person due to being "too angry".

Keep in mind that there are plenty of calm, cool individuals who are complete shitheads despite not showing outward anger to any extreme.



Pillar
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 21 Mar 2018
Age: 27
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Posts: 141

31 Mar 2018, 4:17 am

I suggest not worrying about hurting a family member or a girlfriend in an angry situation. It means you're in a worse condition than theirs and that they should be more understanding. So don't beat yourself up about it too much. That's just my opinion though

Anyway, I can relate. I also have anger issues. I can become irritated or impatient with friends at times.
I have difficulties seeking therapy because of past bad experiences



AnneOleson
Veteran
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Joined: 8 May 2016
Age: 63
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Location: Coventry

31 Mar 2018, 12:43 pm

I yelled at a man in the grocery store today. The aisle was crowded and an employee was trying to stock a shelf. Everyone was stopped waiting for the people at the end of the aisle to move. This guy grabbed my arm to shift me out of his way. I don’t like being touched or pushed. I yelled and embarrassed my husband.

My anger can flash on in an instant.



green0star
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01 Apr 2018, 10:04 am

Maybe you should seek therapy for the anger issues because it can turn into a bad situation really quick. The councilor will tell you how to deal with the triggers and that'll help you to overcome it.